Remember two weeks ago, when I said I was going to lose weight on my own by becoming a healthier person? And I was going to take small steps but didn’t feel like counting calories? Remember that?
Well, I lied.
Because after a week and a half of doing absolutely nothing right and feeling like an absolute failure and waste of space, I woke up bright and early on Sunday morning to attend a Weight Watchers meeting.
My mom had decided, after gaining some of her weight back over the holidays, decided she had to go back because it’s a program that works. And as I sat on my couch on Saturday, drinking my second can of Coke before 2 p.m., I knew I needed a kick in the pants. I needed something that would give me the motivation I needed to lose weight and learn how to eat healthier.
And when I thought about it, there has been one time in my life where I have been successful at weight loss. It was in 2007 and I was attending Weight Watchers. I lost 20 pounds, dropped from a size 8 to a size 2, and felt so great about myself.
Amber also left a comment on that blog posting that stuck with me. She said: “You know, it takes TIME to make those healthy habits stick. When I first lost weight in the spring of 2008 I did it by counting calories. It’s just now, almost 2 years later, that I’m finally at a place where I can eat intuitively and not have to worry about tracking all my food!” And she’s right. It does take time and if I knew how to do it on my own, I wouldn’t find myself in this position.
So I’m back and I’m not going to worry about all the other times I’ve failed. I’m going to focus on this time. My mom re-joined, too, and we’re both on board with eating healthier, being more active, and supporting each other. I’m not going to beat myself up if I have a bad day or even a bad week. This time will be different.
It’s funny but this week I have felt the most in control of my eating habits this week, more than I ever have this entire year. I feel more on track now that I have to count every morsel of food that goes into my mouth and exercise regularly. I’ve been drinking more water than I ever have and eating pretty well. Not perfect, but better than before. So I guess this is what I needed to kick-start my new, healthy life.
It’s going to work this time. It has to.