Tomorrow begins my month-long break from blogging and social media.
It’s a tradition I started back in 2012 when I was going through a painful time and I needed to step away from the online world for just a little bit, to clear my head, to get back to myself.
It was such a rejuvenating time for me, so exactly what I needed, that I have continued to take month-long breaks from blogging and social media each year (excluding 2014).
Usually, I take the break in August, but this year, I decided to take my break in September because I knew I would be moving and I figured it would be best if I could be present during this time of transition, to step away from the distraction and the loudness of social media.
I won’t lie, though, I am seriously having second thoughts about taking my break. I’m worried about how I’ll handle the move, and wondering if the distraction of social media is exactly what I need.
I usually start a social media break excited to get away, but I have trepidation this year. I am drowning in fear of “what if I feel sad… lonely… scared…?”
It’s scary to be this vulnerable, but being vulnerable and completely open to how I’m feeling is the only way I know how to be. Even when it’s scary to admit how terrified I am of change. Even when it’s good change. Even when I want the change.
So there it is. I am scared. But I am going to take the break anyway. Because I know I need to. I know I need to sit with the uncomfortable feelings of loneliness and fear and sadness and let it be okay to not be okay. The distraction of social media is not helpful; what is helpful is acknowledging my feelings and giving myself buckets of grace to make it through the struggle of transition.
I have a lot of plans for how to use my time away. I want to:
- settle into my new place and make it a home. (And try not to freak out about moving in a freaking tropical depression! ARGH!)
- get back to reading my Bible and really digging into the lessons God is trying to teach me right now. I haven’t been very connected to God lately, mostly due to my own inability to accept grace, and that needs to stop.
- figure out my five pillars of singleness. I loved this post from Leigh Kramer that talked about her ideal single life and identified her five pillars of singleness. This really spoke to me in my unending (or so it feels) journey of singleness.
- write lots of fiction because that’s something I haven’t been doing as regularly as I want.
- figure out an exercising schedule that gets me excited to work out again.
It’ll be a good month. A hard month, a growing month, but a good month. I’m excited to start this new journey and to have a place to make 100% my own.
Have a good September, everyone. I’ll be back in October!