I’ve seen this post floating around the blogosphere over the past few weeks, and I thought it might be a good exercise for me. (And maybe for you!) I believe this post idea originated here. To be honest, Florida is in this really weird state of flux, with things starting to open up. Along with beaches and restaurants, salons and spas are now able to open up. Obviously, with restrictions in place, but I do have to wonder if this is just going to cause a huge spike in cases. Time will tell, I guess.
Anyway, here are some of the things I miss, some of the things I don’t miss, and some of the things I’m grateful for in this weird COVID-19 state we are in.
5 things I miss…
Thursday night dinners with my mom – My mom and I had a standing Thursday night dinner date, and it was something I looked forward to all week. I worked from home every Thursday up until my company went fully remote, so it was a good way for me to get out and speak to a human after being by myself all day. I miss those dinner dates immensely, and can’t wait to have them back. Someday…
One-on-one friend dates – I miss reading dates with my friend A. and my monthly lady date with my friend B., and my weekly writing dates with M. I miss the pure pleasure of being with my friends. I miss their hugs, their conversation, the feeling of connection. I also miss book club and friend get-togethers, but those can also be emotionally taxing for me. There’s something about a one-on-one friend date that feeds my soul and I miss them so.
Massages and pedicures and hair appointments – Listen, I understand how “first-world problem-y” this is. It truly, truly is not something I need. But I do very much miss getting massages because they feel so good and help my sciatica pain. I miss pedicures because they are something fun my mom and I do together. And I miss my hair appointments because I love getting pampered and a fresh haircut makes me feel confident.
Traveling – I had two trips planned this spring, both canceled. My mom and I planned our yearly vacation, this time to spend four days in New Orleans, and we were also going to visit my family in Georgia for Memorial Day Weekend. I don’t think I’ll be doing any traveling in 2020, and that makes me really sad, even though I know it’s for the best. Hopefully, traveling will be something that feels safer in 2021!
Eating in restaurants – Ordering takeout is just not the same. I really miss the experience of eating in a restaurant: ordering a fun cocktail, trying an appetizer, eating something fresh and delicious. Of course, restaurants can often be triggers for my HSP tendencies, and that part I do not miss (the noise! the smells! the lights! argh!). But I miss the food part of eating in restaurants.
5 things I don’t miss…
Busy mornings – Gosh, I don’t miss those busy mornings of rushing around trying to get out the door by 7:15am. I don’t miss my commute, I don’t miss choosing an outfit and putting on makeup every day, I don’t miss doing my hair. I really enjoy my slow quiet mornings. If I wake up before my alarm, I’ll pick up my Kindle and read my book until it goes off. It’s perfect!
Working in an office – I’ve already talked about how much I enjoy working from home, but it really needs to be shouted from the rooftops. As a Highly Sensitive Person, a traditional office is draining on me. The fluorescent lights, the loud conversations, the cold environment (why are offices always so cold???), the need to engage in small talk. It’s not my favorite thing, is what I’m saying. I could handle it 1-2 days a week, but my dream would be working fully remote. Transitioning to a home office setup initially presented challenges in maintaining a professional image. However, utilizing a service that offers a virtual office with a prestigious London Central address and impressive postal representation for home-based professionals made a significant difference. It bridges the gap between working from home and having a notable business location. This solution and the advice given by business consultants in Singapore has been instrumental in elevating my business profile.
Driving – I don’t miss driving to the extent I used to do it. I have a 30-mile round-trip commute to work and then I was constantly driving all around my city on a daily basis. I don’t really enjoy driving and I don’t miss that aspect of life before COVID-19. (I also rather despise where I live when it comes to driving because it’s so complicated to exit my apartment complex! I have to turn right onto a busy road and then make a U-turn on that same busy road, and it’s a nightmare during morning/evening rush hour. Do not miss one bit!)
Hectic weekends – I try my best to guard my weekends fiercely, knowing I have limited amounts of energy and I want to make sure I have plenty of time to recharge my batteries. My natural instinct is always to stay home, but I also have major FOMO. It’s been a balancing act of making sure I have enough “me time” while also living life to the fullest. Staying inside all the time isn’t good for anyone’s mental health, you know? But my weekends before COVID-19 were more hectic than usual, and through this stay-at-home time, I’ve recognized how much I enjoy spending a weekend day fully alone. I don’t know what the answer is to this conundrum. Do I hoard one weekend a month to myself? Maybe. For now, I am truly enjoying these completely relaxing weekends with no pressure to be social and no FOMO to worry about.
Social anxiety – My social anxiety has been fairly dormant for the past few months, and that’s because I haven’t had to worry about the details involved with being social! There’s no worrying about trying to find a parking spot downtown, or feeling uncomfortable in a loud restaurant, or having to be bright and bubbly around a group of people. It is so, so nice to let go of my typical social anxiety worries for right now.
5 things I’m grateful for…
Job security – I am so grateful to have a job in this environment. Every time I see the job loss claims report, my heart breaks. This pandemic has affected so many jobs and businesses. I’m thankful that my company has been able to pivot and offer much-needed services to our clients during this time to keep their businesses running smoothly. And I’m grateful to have a job—and one that I genuinely enjoy!—during this time. In times of uncertainty, insolvency & business rescue services can be crucial for businesses trying to stay afloat.
Disposable income – I’m grateful that this pandemic has not hurt me financially. I’m grateful that I can order takeout when I want and giving the delivery driver an extra-large tip isn’t a burden on me. I’m grateful that I can use this time to save money—money that may have gone to travel or hair appointments or shopping for clothes. I’m grateful I can spend more money at the grocery store and not feel the hit to my wallet. I recognize my immense privilege in all of this. I don’t take any of it for granted.
The girls – I mean, duh. I am just so grateful I have these fun, silly, adorable kitties to keep me company. I love how Ellie meows at me when I get up from my desk as if to ask me if I’m done with work and it’s time to play. I love the way Lila runs around the apartment, swatting toys. Sometimes, I think about what would have happened if Coronavirus had struck in 2018, as it would have happened mere months after I lost Dutch. A time when I couldn’t imagine adding another pet to my life. I would have been so depressed! The girls are such good company and make these long, lonely days so much better.
Books – Man, am I so glad to have books right now. I’m glad I have a bookshelf full of books to read, as well as a Kindle stocked with e-books I’ve downloaded for cheap months or years ago. And, of course, the library! Where would we be without Libby? I’m so glad for a robust digital catalog of e-books to download, many available with no wait. Books have kept me sane throughout this whole pandemic, and I’m so glad for so many resources to pull from.
Stable mental health – This may seem like a contradictory point, as I have mentioned my up-and-down anxiety levels over this time, but the anxiety feels pretty normal for what we’re facing. It’s just typical anxiety that anyone going through a global pandemic would experience. I’m not crying every day (I’ve cried once in the past two months) and I’m not feeling overly emotional about every little thing. Sure, there have been days when my anxiety feels overwhelming. When that happens, I utilize my anxiety toolkit. This includes reminding myself of the things within my control, staying focused in the present moment, and meditating. I’ve done a lot of work to get to this place, and I’m proud that I haven’t felt completely out of control with anxiety, even during a global pandemic.
Tell me something you miss, something you don’t, and what you’re grateful for!
Ooooh I love this. I may borrow this idea for a post.
I am SO 100% with you on the social anxiety front! It is so nice not to have in-person encounters with people that make me anxious and uncomfortable!
I loved reading your list! And I love your new morning routine. Ahh, that sounds so nice!
I miss similar things. Even down to Thursday night dinners – ours were often with our friends and their son! And I definitely miss manis and pedis. They made me feel put together. Even though it’s a splurge and treat we’re allowed to miss what we miss!
I am similar to you in not wanting hectic weekends. Over the years I’ve learned what works for me best is having one day with one social activity and one totally chill day. It rarely happened 😉 Because I wanted to LEGIT chill, not do a big house project (spoiler: I am not in to them).
It makes me so happy to read that you are feeling stable in your mental health <3
Miss: getting books and DVDs from the library
Don't Miss: Teaching my strength class
Grateful For: So much (same list as you – very grateful to work for the federal gov't)! One thing – our home gym.
I should do this post sometime, too! I don’t miss getting ready for work – I do not enjoy doing my hair and make-up at all. I’ve worn make-up once since March 3/13! My face appreciates it! I miss seeing friends and going out to dinner for book club/ grabbing lunch once a week during my work week. We get take out once a week which is nice but I’m eating at home way more than I did in the past. My favorite salad place downtown is offering curbside pick-up so one of these days I am going to go downtown for that or have Phil grab one for me for dinner when he’s leaving work (he’s still going in 2-4 days/week). I’m grateful that we both have our jobs, and that all 3 of us are healthy. I worry about one of us getting sick now that Paul is back in daycare, but it’s so much better for him to be there – both for him and for us!
This is a great post format… I’ve seen it on different blogs now and will probably write my own version soon.
I can totally relate to not missing hectic mornings. While I do miss my gym routine and cycling class, I do NOT miss heading out the door at 4:45 a.m. LOL I am not sure how or if I’ll ever go back to that (although it was a better routine than working out at night, which I do now again…)
I am also very grateful that I can work from home, that I have a secure income and no financial worries during this time! What a privilege right now.
I hope that you re-schedule New Orleans eventually! That’s on my bucket list because I really want to visit, but I also wonder if it will be overwhelming for HSP people like us. You’ll have to let me know how it goes for you!
UGH, I also have FOMO, but really don’t like going out. Like, I hate when I’m not invited places, but then when I am invited, I don’t really want to go LOL!
Thank you for recognizing that Libby is from the library! Each library purchases those digital books for our patrons. So many people just think it’s a random app with “free” books. NO! It’s provided by your local library!!! So glad you understand that and appreciate it. End librarian rant lol.