This May, I’m taking on a Buy Nothing challenge.
Honestly, I’m kinda scared about it. Mostly because I have a very complicated relationship with money. I think that’s pretty normal when you grow up as I did, worrying about money from a young age. A lot of the people I know have had very privileged lives – people who didn’t have to take out school loans to afford college, or who received a car for their sixteenth birthday, or who took incredible family vacations just because. (People who are also very aware and recognizant of their privilege, I should say as a disclaimer!)
I try to not compare situations because I know we have to make peace with our past and live in the present. And I don’t want to make it seem like I’m not grateful for all the ways my mom supported me. We may not have had a ton of money, but we had oodles and oodles of love. I got to live at home during college (and living with my mom has always been fun and easy and wonderful), and my mom basically gave up her car to me because I needed it for traveling from work and school.
So money is complicated for me. Even now, when I can support myself and still do (most) of the things I want, I feel weighed down by money, trapped by how much I need it. I can’t go out to a simple dinner with friends without calculating how much everything will cost – and being the lame girl who orders water with dinner because damn drinking is expensive.
I’d like to buy a condo someday in the future, but saving for a down payment is nowhere on my radar.
I’d like to have six months of emergency funds saved, but how do I do that when my bills alone take up more than 60% of my monthly budget?
I’d like to travel a few times a year, but where does that fit in with my longer-term financial goals?
And don’t even get me started about retirement savings or investments or how I’m ever going to afford to have children.
It’s enough to give me a panic attack.
But this is exactly why I want to challenge myself to spend money only on necessities for one month. Because I want to pause my spending, take a step back from my finances, and regroup. I want to challenge myself to say no to spending when I want to say yes. I want to learn more about my money habits and why I want to spend money on XYZ thing – what stories am I telling myself?
And I want to save, save, save. My goal this year is to have $1,000 in emergency savings (I currently have $0, which is a fun way to live your life… if you like to live as if you’re constantly on the top of a roller coaster and just realized you don’t have a seat belt on). I am really interested to see how much money I can save when I’m not spending all of my discretionary income on eating out and Starbucks and Target shopping trips.
So, let’s talk about the logistics of this Buy Nothing month.
What I Can Spend Money On
- Bills (duh)
- Groceries – limiting myself to one visit per week (whimper)
- Gas and any auto-related maintenance – I’m due for an oil change soon, and it might need to get done during May
- Any Dutch-related expenses – food, medication, etc.
- Toiletries – this includes makeup, though I’m very minimalist about my makeup!
What I Cannot Spend Money On
- Restaurants
- Kindle purchases
- Shopping for clothes, household items, accessories, or anything unnecessary
- Starbucks
- Pedicures
- Events that cost money
Basically, anything that is not 100% essential!
The Exceptions for this Month
- My bimonthly hair appointment and eyebrow wax – This appointment was planned months ago.
- Mother’s Day – I’m not sure what we’re doing, but we are doing something.
- Book club – I’m not missing book club due to this challenge. I am absolutely committed to this challenge, but missing book club is like sticking a dagger right into my heart.
- Weekly writing dates – We meet at Starbucks, but instead of my usual breakfast sandwich with a Frappuccino, I’m limiting myself to a tall regular coffee. I’ll put $25 on my card at the beginning of the month and will not be able to reload it again until June!
And that’s that! I am incredibly nervous about this challenge, but I plan on checking in halfway through to discuss how it’s going, what I’ve been struggling with, and any lessons I have learned.
Here we go!
Your best advice for completing a Buy Nothing month for a girl who has a complicated relationship with money?
I’d love to do something like this too someday. I am looking forward to hearing about your results!
I think I committed to a no-buy in February and then it was my most expensive month in a long time. I might try to stick with you for May though! At least the bulk of May – I’m taking a trip the last three days and I will want to enjoy myself then (and my MIL’s birthday, because we’ll go out for dinner for that). We are looking to buy a new house and the thought of all that money is freaking me out.
I do best with groceries when I meal plan (I’m also doing a whole 30-ish thing for May, and I have to be more deliberate about my food for that too) and also making a plan for my week night-wise too. I’m going to get some bath bombs and “plan” nights for myself that involve reading in the bathtub, going for walks with the kids and geocaching. Let’s do this!
I would like to do a challenge like this some time, maybe later this summer after the move is behind me. I think it would be interesting to see how little I could spend in the span of the month. I am pretty frugal and responsible with my money but I still end up buying things that I don’t truly need.
I feel like it took me until my late 20s to really get serious about my finances. I was always responsible with my money as my parents really instilled that in us from an early age, but I definitely had a lot of room for improvement as I want not saving nearly as much as I should. And meeting Phil was another game changer for me as he had no student loan debt (although his parents paid for his undergrad; mine didn’t) while I had sooo much grad school debt outstanding. So I made some big sacrifices in terms of spending and really focused on paying down those loans so I could save more. I work in an industry that has a lower level of job stability so having savings is really important because there’s always a real chance that my job will be eliminated, which is part of the reason that people in my industry are well-compensated. I definitely still have room for improvement, though. But I do want to get to the point where I can find a balance between the right amount of ‘treats/splurges’ and the right amount of frugality. I would say that Phil is on the super frugality end of the spectrum so we are probably good influences on each other! 😉
Good luck with this challenge! I’ll be curious to see how it goes!!
I love this and I know you can do it! It’s scary and hard but I found it to be really freeing to keep my debit card tucked away and not pull it out to buy this or that, “just because.” I kept a journal of what I wanted to spend money on and why, how much I saved (estimated) each time and it was empowering to see the $ add up in our bank account. Most of my notes were “tired, didn’t want to cook, wanted to eat out but cooked anyway.” I also learned when I didn’t spend $ that not all my dinners have to be fancy or gorgeous, it can be breakfast for dinner or simple grilled cheese sandwiches.
Here if you need encouragement or if you need anything. I know it can be challenging but you got this! Just think of all that “extra” money you’ll have at the end of the month.
oh, and p.s.: I drink water or club soda when I go out. Drinking IS expensive. I feel you on that and you aren’t lame 🙂
It’s good that you made rules for yourself. When I’ve done a no-spend challenge, I found that helpful, as well as anticipating things that might come up during the month. My 2 words of advice: don’t feel badly if you have to spend outside of your rules, especially for unforeseen circumstances. Also, when the month is up, try to keep the rules in mind so you aren’t just reverting back to old habits. This is still something I struggle with, particularly with clothes on sale! But nothing feels as good as having extra dough in the savings account or paying off a credit card, not even an inexpensive pair of jeans! you can do this!
I’ve never done an “official” no-spend month, but there have been a few times in my life where I’ve had to really cut my spending down. I’ve taken my debit and credit cards out of my wallet and gave myself a cash allowance for the month (I think it was $40), so any random spending (like Starbucks or lunches) had to come out of that. I’d only use my cards for groceries and other necessities. I think you’re on the right track to having a pretty successful May by reading the rules you’ve set up for yourself! It can be scary and stressful “not having” money, but sometimes it’s the best way to go about saving up too.
I like this!! Imagine me on the sidelines chanting your name!
I’ve been really good at not spending so much the last half year because of my new job situation (half employed, half gig pursuing).
My new challenge is how to earn more and start paying my student loans again. Also, to put retirement back in the mix eventually! Ug, retirement makes me panic too!
I think this is great. It gives you an opportunity to really evaluate your spending and your impulses… and by just keeping it to a month (for now), you can kinda treat it like a “game” that you’re trying to win.
Challenges like this are not meant to be kept up forever, but I think they’re a great opportunity to really see where your priorities lie and where you might be able to be more frugal in the future.
Good luck with this. I am looking forward to hearing about your progress this month.
Good luck with your challenge! I’m working on significantly reducing my spending from now on, too, (April was so expensive for me!) I have so much to save for this year; I really should have started buckling down back in January. 😛
So excited to follow along with you on this! I have been paying more attention to my money these days too and saving is something on my mind. Rooting for you!
I always want to do one of these & then every month seems like a bad month for it, so I never do, but that’s sort of the point, isn’t it? No month is necessarily a “good month” to put your social life on hold to save money, BUT IT’S IMPORTANT… Good luck!