Stephany Writes

Categories: About Me

Life With a CPAP Machine: Six Months Later

I’ve been using my CPAP machine for six months now, and I thought it was time to provide an update on how things are going. The short answer: Amazing! I love my CPAP machine so much. It has changed my life and while I hope that I don’t need to be on it long-term (weight loss could solve my sleep apnea, although that’s not a given), I am so glad it has brought so many positive changes. In fact, I now prefer to sleep with my mask because I know it’s going to ensure I get a good night’s rest and that I won’t wake up with a headache. (I almost always wake up with a headache when I don’t use my CPAP machine.)

Let’s dive into what’s been going well and what’s been a challenge over these last six months.

What’s been going well

Getting used to the mask

I was struggling with the mask in the post I wrote after one week on CPAP. I mentioned how it was pressing weirdly against my nose, causing skin irritation, and was genuinely awkward to sleep with. I’m happy to report that I have gotten used to the mask! I bought moisturizer that’s specific for CPAP patients, and I use it whenever I wake up with dry skin around my nose. It works like a charm! I don’t have to use it often, though, because my skin has gotten used to the mask and it doesn’t feel anywhere near as uncomfortable as it used to.

Improved energy levels

I started seeing improvements in my energy levels quickly. Even after just a week on the CPAP machine, I felt the difference. And those energy levels continue to improve! I no longer feel like I need to take a nap to get through the day. Now, I just take a nap because I genuinely love naps! Ha. What’s been amazing is that sometimes all I need is a quick, 30-minute power nap, which never used to do anything for me! I used to get really anxious if I was going to have a busy day where I knew I couldn’t take a nap, which is an awful feeling. I shouldn’t need a nap to make it through the day! But now a nap is just something I take if I feel like it, but it’s not a requirement to make it through the day.

Normal blood oxygen levels

The reason I did a sleep study in the first place is because I noticed that my blood oxygen levels (as measured by my Apple watch) were very low. Sometimes below 90%! I asked my mom to wear her Apple watch to bed one night because I wanted to see what her blood oxygen level was, and hers was 100%! So that’s when I knew there was a problem. It took a while for my blood oxygen levels to improve; I only started seeing normal numbers in the past few months, but I’m finally measuring with a normal level and that feels really good!

Sleeping like a baby*

*one of those magical babies who goes to sleep quickly and sleeps through the night

I sleep so well when I’m wearing my mask. I fall asleep quickly (usually within 10 minutes) and sleep deeply. My deep sleep measurement continues to improve, although I’m still not getting the recommended 90 minutes – 2 hours of deep sleep. I sleep so much better when I’m wearing my mask than when I’m not. I’ve gotten used to sleeping on my back (I used to be a stomach sleeper and I definitely miss those days!) and I think it helps that I can’t toss and turn into different positions throughout the night.

No more morning headaches

I used to wake up on a regular basis with a headache. I always thought it was because I grinded my teeth at night, but it was more likely due to the lack of oxygen my brain was getting when I was asleep. I’ve never woke up with a headache when I use my CPAP mask at night. It’s a pretty amazing improvement! It’s very nice to wake up refreshed and without my head pounding.

What’s still a challenge

My headgear

I’m supposed to replace my headgear (which is what connects the hose that delivers air to my mask) every four months or so, and the new headgear they gave me in January was different from what I was wearing originally. This new headgear is a little more awkward to use and I still wake up a few times a night to readjust it. It’s not annoying enough to do anything about, and I’m hoping I can get something different the next time it’s time for new headgear.

Being lazy about wearing the mask

I only need to wear the mask 21 days out of the month for insurance purposes, and most months I just barely reach that threshold. Even though I know I sleep better when I use my machine, there are so many nights when I decide I’ll go CPAP-free for the night. I just want to be able to sleep on my stomach and put my arms under my pillows and be less restricted! Ideally, the only day of the week I wouldn’t wear my mask would be the night after cleaning the equipment (since it needs time to dry), but this is a work in progress.

The price of using the machine

It is expensive to be a CPAP patient. Right now, I am still paying off the price of my machine. My insurance company paid a portion and I have to pay about $128 a month out of pocket until the machine is fully paid off. I also have to pay whenever I get new parts; those are not free! Again, insurance will pay a portion but I’m responsible for the difference. Having any sort of medical condition is very costly.

More apneas than I’d like

I was really happy with my apnea score at the beginning of CPAP therapy but lately, I’ve felt a little frustrated by the number. A normal apnea score is fewer than 5 events an hour and while my average for March is 4.6, there are some nights where I’m at 6 or 7 apneas an hour, which feels like a lot to have if I’m using the machine! It’s possible something may need to be adjusted, so it’s something I’m keeping my eye on to talk to my doctor about at some point.

Maintaining the equipment

It’s a bit of a pain to maintain the equipment. Once a week, I need to soak all of the parts (hose, headgear, mask, and humidifier tank) in warm, soapy water for at least 30 minutes, and then let it all air dry. Every morning, I need to dump out the humidifier tank with any remaining water and fill up the tank every evening. I also have to keep a jug of distilled water on hand at all times because I can’t use anything else in the humidifier. It’s not a lot of work, but it’s just an additional task in my life.

All in all, things are going really well with my CPAP therapy. I am more energized, sleeping better, and feeling more like a human. It was really hard to feel so tired all the time and think it was just a flaw with me: I wasn’t doing enough to get good sleep. I was lazy. Everyone is tired! Why should I feel like I’m special? Turns out, it was something more and now that my brain is getting the oxygen it needs throughout the night, surprise! I no longer feel exhausted every single day. It’s a really good feeling.

How is your sleep lately? Do you feel like you get enough sleep on a regular basis?

Categories: About Me

Marches of Years Past

Let’s continue our walk down memory lane with today’s post where I’m showing you all of the photos I have (either on Facebook, the blog, or my phone) during the different Marches of my life (March being the month, not the activity). So far, I’ve shown you July, February, and May.

March 2011

My graduation photoshoot! I graduated college in May 2011 and a school friend who was trying to start a photography business offered to take professional photos of me. I loved this photoshoot and it’s so sweet to have these photos to look back on.

March 2012

My heart! This is one of my all-time favorite photos of my mom and my older nephew. He was only three-and-a-half years old here and helping my mom make chocolate chip cookies. Isn’t his smile the cutest? It gets me every time!

March 2013

I have no photos!

March 2014

This collage makes me smile so big because look who makes an appearance! Lisa and I met for the first time in March 2014 when she was in town. We met at Starbucks and had the best time chatting away. This month, I also did Run or Dye, which was a 5K where people threw different-colored dye on you as you ran through the course. It was really fun, even though I remember that it took a while to get all of the dye out of my hair, ha. And here’s a cute photo of my Dutchy-Boy. I miss you, buddy.

March 2015

My mom and I traveled to Savannah in March 2015 so we could participate in a 5K. Mostly, I just wanted an excuse to go back to Savannah. I hated the 5K because I hate running. I kept thinking to myself, “Two more miles and you never have to run again!” “Half a mile and you never have to run again!” Muahaha. It wasn’t my last race (I’ve done walking 5Ks since then) but I did finally give myself permission to stop trying to become a runner!

March 2016

In March 2016, I went on a really fun four-day cruise with Bri, my mom, and my stepdad. Bri and I really had the best time together and I loved our excursion in Mexico where we got to snorkel and sail on a catamaran. I also love the video I got of Bri doing the macarena in front of the whole group, ha!

March 2017

How about some cute photos of Dutch? This month, he turned 15 years old and while he would steadily decline over the year (he died the next February), it was such an honor to be his person and his safe space when he was feeling crummy. <3

March 2018

A month after my soul-dog passed away and it was a hard one. I dog-sat for two adorable beagles, which soothed my soul. I also got a cute haircut and Dutch’s pawprint in the mail.

March 2019

March 2019 was a great one! My friend Lynn threw a pool party at her house, I was on my first full month of being a cat mom of two, and I met Taylor Jenkins Reid at a book signing in Tampa!

March 2020

There were so many photos I could choose to represent March 2020 and I went with this one. My mom and I went to a pet portrait event at this art studio (that sadly did not survive the pandemic and it breaks my heart!) right before the world shut down and I am so glad we were able to fit in one last social outing. Also, can we talk about my hair in this photo? BANGIN’.

March 2021

What a mix of photographs! I got a spin bike, had a book club picnic (we got close for this photo but otherwise stayed on our own blankets!), and met a two-day-old puppy who would become my little Lucy. Look at how SMOL!

March 2022

I got a new desk chair and the girls were all about it! Sometimes they let me use it. 😉 And I took this photo of my mom and me at The Library for brunch. We were celebrating because the lump she found on her chest a week ago turned out to be a cyst that wasn’t anything to worry about. Whew!

March 2023

My friend Amber and I did a fun knife skills class together at Sur La Table. I learned a lot but I definitely freaked out the instructor when I used the hand holding the chef’s knife to scratch an itch on my forehead. Whoopsie!

March 2024

Look at these cuties! My mom made her podcast debut this time last year and it was so much fun to have her on the podcast to talk about motherhood, her personality, and what a delight it has been to parent an angel like me. (Her words, definitely not mine.)

March 2025

And then there’s this month. A girls’ weekend in Orlando where I got to love on some really cute pets, visit two bookstores, and leave the trip with five more books than I started with.

What’s a photo you would have chosen to represent March 2020?

Categories: About Me

Ask Stephany Anything | Part III

It’s time for another round of Ask Stephany Anything! You can still fill out my form if you have any burning questions you want me to answer. I am pretty much an open book (with some exceptions, of course!). Today, I’m answering questions from Kyria, Cait, and Nicole, all about cruising and books (my two favorite topics!).

Kyria and Cait both had the same question for me, which is: Do you have any cruises planned for 2025?

Yes! My mom and I plan on taking some sort of cruise this summer. We will either do another Caribbean cruise or we may try to do a European one. It all depends on how things shake out financially the way I hope it will (sorry to be vague!). If it does, we’re looking at a cruise that starts in either Rome or Barcelona. We would spend a few days in the city before leaving on the cruise. We haven’t been to Europe since our first time there in 2019 so we are overdue for another visit!

Kyria had some additional cruising questions.

What is your favorite cruise so far?

My second cruise, which I took in May 2012 with my mom. It was a six-day cruise where we went to Key West, Grand Cayman, and Jamaica. I loved Jamaica. It was the first time I went zip-lining (I’ve been four more times!) and I still think Mystic Mountain in Ochos Rios has the best zip-lining course. Not only do you get to take an air tram through the rainforest to get to the mountain, but there are so many fun lines and the tour guides are exceptional.

We also did a bike ride through Key West where neither of us got injured (truly a feat!) and had a fun dolphin encounter in Grand Cayman. We really lived it up with the excursions! The ship was also pretty nice, and we had a really fun dinner group.

If I were going to do a cruise, which company would you recommend and why?

While I have yet to do a cruise on this cruise line, I would recommend Virgin Voyages. First of all, these cruises are for adults only. If you don’t want to be surrounded by screaming kids and babies, then this is the cruise line for you. Second, the food is supposed to be way better. On a typical cruise ship (like Carnival or Royal Caribbean), you go to a dining room for dinner where you select food from a limited menu (or you can go to the buffet). On Virgin, it’s all restaurants, baby! You can choose from a handful of different cuisines depending on your mood (they also offer room service for those nights you just want to take it easy). I believe they also offer helpful discounts for solo travelers, too!

I’ve had multiple friends cruise on Virgin and they are total converts that it’s the only way to cruise. My mom and I plan to book a Virgin cruise this year so I can give firsthand knowledge of what I think very soon!

And Nicole had some bookish questions for me.

What are your top five favourite books of all time, as an adult? What about as a child?

Nicole, this is such a cruel question but I am going to try my best to answer it. These are not in any particular order and I am certain I’m going to be mad at myself for not including so-and-so book as I look back on this post, but here we go:

  • Homegoing by Yaa Gyasi – I want everyone I know to read this book.
  • A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Hosseini – Ditto. Such a powerful story.
  • Tiny Beautiful Things by Cheryl Strayed – I’ve reread this one a few times because the advice means so much to me.
  • This is How It Always Is by Laurie Frankel – Ughhh, I just couldn’t get enough of this book!
  • The Hating Game by Sally Thorne – I have to include at least one romance novel on this list, and this one is my all-time fave.

Now, as a child, I was not reading great fiction. I read a lot of series with my favorites being The Baby-Sitter’s Club and Sweet Valley, of course. (I tried reading a Sweet Valley book a couple of years ago and hoo boy, it did not stand the test of time.) Other favorites included the American Girl series and the Dear America series, which probably fueled my love for historical fiction. I read a bit of Nancy Drew and Goosebumps. Oh, and my foray into romance novels definitely started with the Love Stories series. Does anyone remember those? Gah, I was obsessed with them and I remember the teen room at my library having one of those plastic spinning book displays with all of their trade paperbacks shoved into every nook and cranny. I loved those books and would reread them over and over again. I also read a lot of Christian series books like Christy Miller and the Mandie books.

My mom tried to get me to read at least one biography every month or so, and I remember tearing through biographies about the Magnificent Seven (the 1996 women’s gymnastics team) and Tara Lipinski/Michelle Kwan. I was also enthralled with Clara Barton for some reason.

What is the least appropriate book you ever read when you were young? (thinking about this as I am going to reread Flowers in the Attic, which I read at about age 11 or 12)

I remember there was an afternoon where I was at my great-grandma’s house and I must have been feeling unwell because I was cooped up in her bedroom. Somehow, I found a very raunchy romance novel that involved a woman giving birth on the side of the road and a very nice hunky man being there to help her. It was my first-ever romance novel and I don’t even remember how old I was when I read it (probably no more than 12). There were definitely some explicit sex scenes in that book that I was not supposed to be reading (and it also shocked me that my prim and proper great-grandma had these kinds of books on hand!), but wowwww, did I want to read more of these books!

If you’ve been on a Virgin Voyages cruise, do you have any further insight for Kyria? Did you read any inappropriate-for-your-age books when you were young?

Categories: About Me

Ask Stephany Anything | Part II

During NaBloPoMo in November, I asked you guys to send me questions to answer. Annnd… I answered just a handful of questions and promptly forget to answer the rest. My bad! Today, I’m answering the questions that Engie submitted to my form.

Which cat is your favorite?

I refuse to answer this question! Both cats are my favorites for very different reasons. Eloise is my Velcro Kitty who never leaves my side, sleeps in between my legs (or on top of me) at night, and will let me pick her up and kiss her face. She’s also much easier to get into a carrier! But damn, sometimes I’m like, “Girl, can you not sit right in front of my keyboard all day long? Can I have some SPACE?!” (But then when she does give me space, I miss her.)

I feel so honored to be chosen by Lila. She does not give her love easily or freely (it’s only in the last few months that she’s even allowed my mom to pet her). She does not let me pick her up and is a straight-up menace to get into a carrier. But when she wants to give me love, oh boy, is it the absolute sweetest thing in the world. I will literally drop everything I’m doing when she jumps up on the couch and shows me her belly or head-butts my hand when I’m trying to work.

They are both my favorites because they are two very different cats with their own personalities, and I am obsessively in love with them.

Are you going to stay in Florida (after the hurricanes, election, etc.)?

I have no plans to leave Florida. It’s not exactly easy to uproot one’s entire life and move to an entirely different state, and I have no desire to do so. My family is here, my friends are here, my community is here. I love Florida, even though our politics suck (I am grateful to live in a blue area of a red state, though!). And while last year’s hurricane season was a difficult one, it was the first time in the 37 years I’ve lived in Florida that we’ve really had to contend with hurricane damage and loss. And even though my car flooded and I had to go through the rigamarole of the insurance process, it wasn’t nearly as terrible as the loss other people are experiencing. Will my tune change if our hurricane seasons get worse? For sure. But for now, I’m staying put in Florida.

What are you looking for in a life partner?

I want someone who is kind and will go out of their way to treat people well. I want someone who will do little things to make my life better, whether that’s picking up a treat for me because they know I’ll love it or making a call that I don’t want to make. I want someone who is liberal and happy to discuss politics with me. I want someone who is ambitious in whatever way that looks like for them, whether that’s ambitious with their career or their personal goals or their relationships. I want someone who has hobbies and invests time in the things they like to do. They don’t have to be a reader, but that would be a bonus. I want someone who feels like home, who pushes me to be better, and who is willing to have deep conversations about personality types.

What’s a dealbreaker in your dating life?

Trump supporters. Republicans in general. Smokers. People with kids. People who are allergic to cats. Apolitical people.

I have more than a few, it seems.

What book do you recommend to non-readers to get them to like reading?

Hmm, this is hard. Can I tell you something? I don’t believe that everyone needs to be a reader. While it’s my favorite hobby, I’m A-OK with people finding other ways to fill their time. However, I do think that, many times, people who think they don’t like reading just haven’t found the right book. And for those people who may want to dip their toes into the reading waters, I might recommend:

  • A great romance that’s not too spicy and has some depth, like one of Taylor Jenkins Reid’s earlier novels (I’m partial to One True Loves personally)
  • A propulsive thriller they can’t put down, like maybe one of TJ Newman’s books (her debut, Falling, is excellent) or Wrong Place, Wrong Time by Gillian McAllister
  • A fascinating memoir like Between Two Kingdoms by Suleika Jaouad or The Sound of Gravel by Ruth Wariner
  • Or maybe I’d just shove Homegoing by Yaa Gyasi in their hands since it’s one of my all-time favorite books

What’s your go-to book recommendation? If you have burning questions for me, fill out my form!

Categories: About Me

Thirty-Seven

It’s my birthday! And Thanksgiving! It’s birthsgiving.

Today, I’m 37 years old. A few nights ago, I was lying in bed and had to do the math. How old am I going to be? For some reason, I thought I was turning 38 so there’s a kindness that I’m only 37.

If I think back to myself as a young person—a conservative Christian who thought she was going to get married young and have lots of babies—I wonder if that younger me would be upset at the way her life has turned out. Unmarried. No babies (just four-legged ones). And no longer a Christian.

I also think about the me I am today, and who I would be if that life had turned out the way I expected it to. What if I had gotten married in my early twenties and was a mother to multiple children? Would my marriage be a healthy one? How would I feel about motherhood? Would I still be a conservative Christian and… shudder… a Republican?

I’m quickly zooming past the age where I can have children. If I got pregnant today, it would be considered a geriatric pregnancy. I don’t think I want to have kids at this stage of my life, but it’s not something that’s totally off the table. I don’t feel any tug toward motherhood, which is probably the sign that I shouldn’t have kids. I don’t think I have the energy for kids, nor do I think my little anxious heart could handle it.

Marriage, though, is still something I deeply desire. I think about having a wedding and having a person who feels like home. I think about building a life with someone else and having someone to lean on when times are hard. I want that. I hope I get to experience that someday. (I was recently watching a game show and one of the women on the show was in her 70s and talked about her husband. “How long have you been married?” the host asked. “Thirty years!” She said proudly. She got married in her 40s! It gave me hope that I, too, could find my person later in life.)

At age 36, my body started to fall apart. Okay, fine, that’s dramatic but I dealt with two new diagnoses: scalp psoriasis and severe obstructive sleep apnea.

The scalp psoriasis is finally under control, thanks to getting steroid injections in my scalp. It’s so painful but it’s so much better than the constant itching and dry skin I was dealing with. I would get injections every month to keep those symptoms at bay, if I had to. Thankfully, it appears that one treatment was all I needed. I’m also using specialized shampoo once a week and a liquid steroid multiple times a week, which keeps everything in maintenance mode.

Being diagnosed with severe obstructive sleep apnea was both terrifying and relieving. Terrifying because, hello, I stop breathing 40+ times an hour when I sleep! That’s crazy! But relieving because now I understand why I am so tired all of the time and it’s not because I’m lazy or have terrible sleep hygiene or need to stop eating so much sugar. Nope. It’s because I have a diagnosed sleep condition. It was a long road to getting on CPAP therapy (my original sleep study was in April and I didn’t get my CPAP machine until the end of August), but now that I’ve been on CPAP, my life has changed dramatically. I have energy and focus. I don’t need a nap to get through every day. My afternoon brain fog has lifted. I’m hoping I’ll also see improved blood work numbers, too, as the lack of oxygen can cause upward trends with heart disease numbers. It feels good to feel good.

This year brought a major shift to my work life when my boss announced that she was leaving the company. I was devastated to put it plainly. She has been such an amazing mentor for me and has championed my growth in the company more than anyone. She is also someone I just liked and enjoyed working for. She was smart and funny and not too corporate-y. She is someone I felt I could be honest with about my struggles, both personally and professionally. We loved ending our 1:1 meetings by chatting about what we were reading. I thought the world of her and while I was happy for her to spread her wings to do something else, I was so sad that I wouldn’t be working directly with her anymore.

I was also nervous. Who would be her replacement and would I like them? How would this change our department? Senior leadership changes like this can have drastic effects, and although our department runs like a well-oiled machine, I wasn’t sure if there would be changes implemented that I wouldn’t like.

My new boss started the last week of October and there was an almost-immediate connection. She already has some really interesting ideas for shaking things up in our department—in a good way. She’s easy to talk to and I can already tell that we’re going to have a great working relationship. I’m excited to get to know her better and hopefully make some much-needed changes to our department!

There were hard things about this year. There was Hurricane Helene that flooded my car and destroyed the homes of two of my close friends. And then Milton two weeks later that prompted an evacuation. There was my non-existent dating life (one date-from-hell and then a few dates with someone who always left me feeling disappointed, meh). My uncle died from cancer and we got a hard diagnosis for another family member. Trump was re-elected. My mental health was up and down, and there were some changes in friendship dynamics that I’m still processing.

But there were good, good things. There was a trip to New Orleans with my mom and a weekend in Chicago with Kim. There was the Popcast Live! There were incredible book club experiences (flower arranging and candle making and murder mysteries!). I joined a gym and saw so many gains in my fitness level, including using heavier weights and making it through HIIT classes without wanting to die. I got bangs again and started dyeing my hair at home (with the help of friends). I got a nose ring! I got a promotion to senior manager. I created a cute reading nook in my bedroom.

What do I want out of this next year of my life? It’s hard to know where I will be a year from now. Will I have found some success in my dating life? Maybe. Will I have lost some weight? I’d like it because I want to be off CPAP and have better blood work results. Will I be typing up this birthday post next year from a beautiful, two-bedroom apartment? I really hope so. Mostly, though, I hope I continue to be satisfied and happy with the life I have built for myself. It took hard work to get here, and I am so proud of the person I am and the life I get to live.