Stephany Writes

Categories: Life

Grateful

I’ve been in a very blah kind of mood lately. I don’t really know why this is, other than some changes happening in my life and all the bad eating I did this week. I remember listening to the radio one day and a guest they had on talking about negativity and how we need to discover what is good in our lives, instead of focusing on all the bad.

And there is a lot of good in my life…

  • I have a job. Albeit, I’m no longer working with a good friend who I had so much in common with and enjoyed working with, nor am I working with the best 2- and 3-year-olds who will ever live, but I do have a job. My hours have not been drastically cut, even though our numbers are low. And I do get to work with adorable toddlers, ages 13-16 months. Cuteness personified.
  • I have the ability to attend a pretty awesome university with an accredited journalism program. I’ve talked about what my summer is going to look like and it’s not going to be an easy, breezy summer like I had hoped. But this summer gets me one step closer to graduation and offers me the challenge of growing and stretching myself. I’m lucky enough to have a mother who can support me and who does so in every facet of my life.
  • I’m starting to understand this health thing. Granted, I had a bad week last week as I was in a mini-vacation mode. But I’m committed to living a healthier lifestyle and I understand what this entails now. It’s not so much about choosing foods that give me less points, but choosing foods that may be higher in points but as higher in fullness levels and with less bad stuff in them.
  • My 19-month-old nephew, who is an absolute joy. He is at an age where he’s talking more, being silly, and just so much fun to be around. When I take pictures with him, he wraps his arm around my neck and gives the silliest, goofiest grin. He gets angry when we reprimand him and it’s probably the funniest thing you will ever see! I love this little boy with all of my heart and you really cannot ever be in a bad mood around him. He’s too funny!
  • This blog community. I’ve been blogging for years before I started this blog and I never knew about this amazing community of bloggers. I’ve become friends with some amazing people who just make me smile with their supportive comments. I just love reading about your lives and all of you seriously inspire me.

Your turn! What are you grateful for today?

Categories: Life

Sometimes, I Like to Whine

I had a bit of a meltdown on Mother’s Day. And my mom, being the mom she is, took it all in stride. She talked me down from the cliff. On the day where I should have been honoring her, she showed me the utmost support and devotion. (Even as I threw out f-bombs, cried, and freaked out over little things.)

And then I signed up for two more classes.

Basically, my story is that I haven’t taken my language classes yet. When I was an education major, the three years I took Spanish in middle and high school counted as a language credit. But with journalism, and now that I’m going for my B.A. degree (instead of the B.S., as education is), I need to take two college-level language classes. The only way to get out of them is to take an exemption test.

When I signed up for classes in March, I signed up for Spanish I in summer and Spanish II in fall. After seeing what my tuition would cost me for summer, I knew I couldn’t handle paying over $2,000. So I dropped the language class and told myself I would have to teach myself Spanish this summer.

But I freaked out on Sunday. I honestly don’t think it’s possible for me to be fluent in Spanish within a few months where I could pass an exemption test. I don’t even think I was fluent after taking three years of it!

So I signed back up for Spanish for summer. The good news and bad news is that it’s online. Good news because I think it’ll be easier online and bad news because online classes cost about $100 more in tuition. (The in-class version didn’t fit with my schedule.) Yes, it means there will most likely be no awesome vacation for my mom and me this summer. It means my crazy hair change is going to have to wait until late July or August. (And by then, my hair will probably be at my waist. Eek!) But it also means less stress and less worry. I’ve had this weight upon my shoulders about whether or not I’ll be able to graduate in December. And now it’s gone.

In addition, I have to take one exit course. I tried to sign up for an online one in the fall, but it would put me at 19 credit hours which isn’t allowed. So I had to sign up for one in the summer. And I’m not happy about it because it’s a 10-week course. And it’s a night class. And it’s two days a week. Sure, there are worse things in the world. Like job loss. And hunger. And bad haircuts.

I was looking forward to an easy summer. I was looking forward to putting a lot of money towards my credit cards and maybe taking a nice vacation. I was looking forward to sleeping in on Saturdays and spending my weekends doing “me” things. And now my summer will be consumed by school.

I’m holding tight to my December 11th graduation date. I’m going to make it to that date. It’s going to be a struggle. I’m going to fight it. And I might even whine more, just as I did in this post. Just stick with me.

Categories: Life

Successes & Failures

This semester was not easy. Many times, it was not fun. I cried over school more now than I ever had before, excluding my awful final internship. I’ve never been so stressed out in my life. I was stretched beyond belief. I had to step outside my comfort zone more times than ever. I dealt with exhaustion. I began this semester with stars in my eyes. And I ended this semester with stars in my eyes.

I succeeded in ways I never imagined. I did things I never thought I could do. I stepped out of my comfort zone and found a new Stephany. One who is confident in her abilities. One who is creative. One who has a critical eye to design and editing. One who can take a blank page and make it into a piece of art. One who is perky and bright. One who takes on unfamiliar projects and succeeds. One who forgets all the limits she has placed on herself. One who is proud of herself and isn’t afraid to say so.

I put more hours this semester into homework and studying for tests than I ever have before. I spent entire weekends, working on assignment after assignment. In past semesters, I could put in a few hours on Saturday and be good for the week. I have never worked so hard in my life.

I had meltdowns over this semester. I wondered how I was going to manage to do it all. I knew I was stretching myself thin, between working 25 hours at my job, 10 hours at my internship, and my 3 classes. These classes involved more work and more dedication than I have ever taken. By the end of January, I began to hate my life and question whether I could do this.

But I did it. I succeeded. I put my heart and soul into my magazine project. I studied my brains out for my law exams. And I learned more about the editing process that just made me love writing all the more.

With those successes, come failures. I found myself confused more often than not. I wrote some very crappy stories that I’m a little embarrassed to tie my name to. I wrote a term report on a subject I knew nothing about, yet did nothing to familiarize myself with the topic. I rushed through some assignments. I didn’t do my best work. I didn’t try hard enough. This will be my worst semester since I started in the journalism program, grades-wise.

Still, I can’t be upset with myself. Even if this won’t be a straight-A semester like I’ve had previously in the journalism program, it will be a semester where I worked my hardest. And if I make a B in a class where I did my very best work? A B in a class I thought I would fail? I’m fine with that. After all, a B is nothing to be ashamed of.

Categories: Life

By The Numbers…

I’ve seen other bloggers do these type of blog posts but never felt as if there was anything that significant I was counting down to. But I definitely am now:

16 hours until I’m finished with Spring Semester 2010

2 days until my Recuperate Day (where I’ll spend the majority of my time cozied up in bed, reading and relaxing.)

12 days until my advanced reporting class starts, a 6-week intense class

25 days until I complete The 30-Day Shred challenge

2 months until a (tentative) weekend trip to Orlando

3.5 months until my (hopefully!) last semester of college begins

7 months, 1 week, and 3 days until graduation

What special events are YOU counting down to?

 

Categories: Life

Because I’m Too Worn Out For a Real Post

  • I took a little unannounced blogging break, mainly because I worked all last weekend on my law term paper (about a topic I was clueless on) and finishing up some law journals to hand in on Thursday. And then I was busy with that little magazine project you might have heard me mention a time or two. The semester is slowwwly winding down (only 10 days left!) so I’ll be blogging less until I get my feet back from under me.
  • In completely awesome news, I finished my magazine today! It has to be the best feeling ever to know I am done and still have over a week to tweak it until it’s due. I’m going to send the file to my professor so he can give me his opinion and critique so I know exactly what I need to fix. This project caused me so much stress and tension but once I found out that my professor liked my magazine, it became so much fun! It didn’t feel like I was doing homework when I was working on this project. And I’m super happy with the way it’s turned out.
  • I signed up for 4 courses over the summer, forgetting that my scholarship doesn’t pay for summer classes and my financial aid still hasn’t been reinstated. So I might have freaked out a little bit when I saw my tuition would be around $2,500 which is just a little unaffordable. So I’ll be taking two classes and then hoping to get my scholarship back/financial aid reinstated for fall so I can take 5 classes and finish up my undergraduate degree!
  • I’ve made a lot of changes to this blog while on my “break.” First off, I changed the layout and I love, love, love it! And since I paid money for it, I’m hoping I don’t get bored with it in a month. I tend to do that. I also fixed my blogroll and made a new 101 days list. I loved how clean and simple Lauren’s looked and went for one like hers with the categories which makes it so much easier for me to look at. I had to make some new goals for the ones I already completed, since I started my 1,001 days over, so check it out!
  • I have a short three-day workweek next week which I’m thrilled about! That’s two days where I don’t have to wake up before 5am! I took those two days to help with getting everything completed before finals weeks starts and I think I’m going to manage to do everything. Wow! (And the week after that, I took Friday off to recuperate from this semester. I can’t wait!)
  • In May, I’m taking on The 30-Day Shred challenge. I think I need a challenge for my exercise life, since I do everything in my power to get out of it. Anyone up to doing the challenge with me? Pretty please?