Recurring Series

TGIF (v. 34)

The high of my week was… visiting my mom and stepdad’s new home! They closed on it yesterday and my mom invited me over to see it after work. They’re planning on doing a lot of work before officially moving in (tiling the living room, having new carpet installed in the bedrooms, and painting the bedrooms) and their lease isn’t up until mid-August so they can take their time moving in, which is nice. I got to dip my toes in the pool and I am very excited to spend oodles of time there. 🙂

The low of my week was… watching Florida’s COVID-19 cases continue to rise. We’re now seeing 2,000+ cases on a daily basis and passed the horrific milestone of 3,000 deaths this week. Our governor attributes the rising case numbers to more testing, so he refuses to take any further action. Right now, I’m paying close attention to how many hospital beds we have available. (35 in my county—it was at 61 at the beginning of the week.)

An anti-racism resource I’d like to share is… Anti-Racism Daily, an e-newsletter written by Nicole Cardoza. I believe it is free to subscribe, but I’ve joined her Patreon to support her work. This newsletter gives you one anti-racism task to do every day and explains the why behind it. I have found it instrumental as I go about my own anti-racism work and I truly appreciate what Nicole is doing.

A podcast episode I enjoyed was… American Police by Throughline. (I feel like I am constantly recommending Throughline episodes, but they are just so informative!) This episode talks about the history of American police and it’s as horrific as you might imagine.

The best money I spent was… $80 for my keyboard replacement! My laptop is FIXED and I am oh-so-happy to have it back in working order. I am going to be so careful with keeping open containers on my desk now because I definitely don’t want to go through something like this again. (Especially right now, when I need my laptop to work!)

My plans this weekend include… painting at my mom and stepdad’s new place, a Zoom writing date, and family game night! I’m also planning on doing virtual tours for two apartments… and I’ll talk more about why I’m doing that next week. (Suspense!)

What was the high of your week?

Categories: Recurring Series

A Day in the Life: Monday, June 15, 2020

This year, I have a goal to write one “day in the life” post a quarter, and as Q2 draws swiftly to a close, I realized I needed to document one of my days! I chose Monday, a fairly average day where nothing exciting happened because it was a good look at what life these days looks like for me. Enjoy!

6:30AM: My alarm goes off. I snooze it and then Lila wants to snuggle with me. I’m more than happy to oblige!

6:45AM: I get up and get dressed for a workout. I do one walking loop around my apartment complex (around 15 minutes) and then come back inside for a 30ish-minute strength workout. (In my Notes app, I made a list of around 30 body weight and dumbbell strength moves, and for my strength workouts, I selected 10 of them to do. This way, every workout involves different moves so I don’t get bored!)

7:45AM: I take a shower and it feels AMAZING. I love starting my day with a shower, but I typically only do so when I work out in the morning. Otherwise, I let myself sleep in as long as possible. I also put on my “day pajamas”—this has become my uniform for working from home.

(Excuse my dirty mirror!)

8:10AM: I log into work and send an email to my manager about my to-do list for today. It’s going to be a busy day, but most of the tasks are more “admin-like” and won’t require much brainpower from me. Then, I make breakfast and eat while starting this post.

8:45AM: I start my workday with some admin tasks for one of my sites that launched a new design last week and then edit a blog to send to a client. After that, I listen in on a meeting that took place last week. Since I don’t need to take notes, I can listen while I brush my teeth, put dishes away, and tidy up around the apartment.

10:00AM: I take a break and read two chapters of my book. Then, Ellie starts to loudly meow at me for pets, so I oblige her.

10:20AM: I answer a call from my director who talks to me about a meeting I missed on Friday. (I kept getting kicked off the Zoom call because there were too many people logged in, womp!) The meeting was all about our return to the office. As of right now, the office is reopening on July 7th and will be open twice a week for people to come in and work if they want to. All common areas will be shut down. While I don’t have any desire to go into the office, I would like to go in and clean out my desk a bit! When I left the office in mid-March, I didn’t realize I wouldn’t be back for such a long time!

10:30AM: I have a Zoom meeting to discuss the contract for a new client. I am really excited to work on this account because it’s a woman-owned mental health clinic! Talk about my wheelhouse!

11:00AM: The meeting goes a little longer than normal, and once it’s over, I get to work finalizing meeting notes for a meeting that was held last week.

12:00PM: I take a break to leave a video on Marco Polo for a friend, and then heat up pizza for lunch. I eat lunch while reading Reddit and then lay on the couch to read my book. I contemplate taking a nap but decide I’d rather finish up work early than work late today.

1:15PM: Back to work! I read through my emails and then finish up the meeting summary. Once the summary is uploaded to our project management system, I work through some QA tasks for one of my websites.

3:00PM: I need a break from my computer, so I lay on the couch to finish my book. It’s a longer-than-usual break, but ah well, that’s the beauty of work-from-home life! I also make myself a snack of string cheese and Greek yogurt. While I work, the girls enjoy relaxing in the sun. 🙂

3:30PM: Back at it. I work on updating metadata for one of my sites and completing admin tasks for a site that launched last week. That ended up taking much longer than I expected because I needed to create very detailed notes about posting to this client’s website for the writer who will be taking over the account.

5:45PM: Finally done with work. I expected to finish up earlier than this (I don’t really have an “end” time now that I work from home. I typically work until I log a specific number of hours or complete the tasks I assigned myself for the day.), but my last task of the day took longer than I imagined! I log off and hop onto my bed to play Candy Crush and zone out with a podcast. Lila jumps up to nap next to me, which is so cozy and lovely. I also start reading The City Baker’s Guide to Country Living.

7:00PM: I finally get up because my tummy is growling! I heat up spaghetti for dinner. (No, today was not the healthiest. It happens!) I eat while watching a few episodes of Life in Pieces. I also make some break-and-bake cookies for dessert, which were delicious!

8:00PM: I turn off the TV and play with the girls for a while and then give them treats. Then I clean up the kitchen, tidy up around my apartment, and clean out the litter boxes. I brush my teeth before crawling into bed.

9:00PM: I Facetime my mom, but she doesn’t answer, so I scroll through my phone for a while until my mom calls me back. We have a really nice chat, and she’s in a good mood since she closes on her house on Thursday. (!!!) I was feeling a little lonely and anxious and talking to her definitely helped. <3

9:45PM: I read another chapter in my book. It’s not totally grabbing my attention just yet, but I have faith that it will soon.

10:15PM: Lights out! (Unfortunately, it’s a pretty wretched night of sleep and I toss and turn until about midnight when I finally fall asleep, ugh. I haven’t been taking melatonin regularly, and I think I have to get back to doing so.)

Categories: Recurring Series

TGIF (v. 33)

The high of my week was… the return of game night! We had a long hiatus from game night, as we pause our biweekly Saturday night tradition during football season. Usually, we start it back up after the Super Bowl but my brother got the flu and was out of commission for a few weeks and then Coronavirus happened. My brother texted my mom and me on Saturday, asking if we were up for game night, and we were both totally on board! It felt so nice and normal and wonderful to hang out and play games and eat pizza. I’m trying to continue to be cautious about venturing out and being around people, but I feel safe having my mom, stepdad, brother, and nephews in my circle.

The low of my week was… the horrific murder of George Floyd. It feels so trite to call it a “low” of my week, but his murder has been on my mind constantly. It’s not that these deaths are surprising, but they do make me feel so angry. And helpless. As a white woman, I don’t know what my role here should be. I try to educate myself as best as I can on racial injustice through books, articles, and podcasts. I try to educate other white people, although I could definitely do a much better job of that because I know how fragile white people are and I kowtow to their needs more than they deserve. I could also do a better job of lifting up Black voices on social media. Sometimes I worry that I’m just adding to the noise and doing something that doesn’t require any effort on my part. But maybe the point isn’t about my role in this—maybe it’s just about exposing the white people in my circle to Black voices and views in the hopes of breaking them out of their bubble.

An article I appreciated was… 75 Things White People Can Do for Racial Justice by Corinne Shutack. I encourage every white person to read this list and write down a few of the things you can do to either expose yourself to the Black experience or work on criminal justice initiatives in your community. I know I’ll be looking through this list this weekend and thinking about the steps I can take.

A podcast series I’m enjoying is… In the Dark: Coronavirus in the Delta. I’m way behind on my podcast queue so I’ve only listened to two of the episodes in this series so far, but it’s so very good. (I’d expect nothing less from the In the Dark team!) It’s all about how Coronavirus is affecting people living in the Mississippi Delta. Episode one focused on churches and episode two was about conditions at the prison. It’s unflinchingly honest—truly excellent reporting.

The best money I spent was… $291 on two new bar stools for my apartment! Whew, let’s take a swift left turn on this post. Since I am planning on staying in my apartment through 2021, most likely, as I save up for a down payment on a condo, I have decided to invest in a few things to make my apartment more livable for the time being. The first thing was trading in my rickety bar stool for two more comfortable ones! I found these bar stools on Wayfair available at a deep discount, so I bought two and they arrived yesterday! I have to put them together, which I’m planning on doing tonight. It’ll be so nice to have a comfortable place to sit and eat in my apartment! (And I know the cats will greatly enjoy them, too, and isn’t that the most important thing?)

My plans this weekend include… literally nothing. Ah, that’s how it is these days, right? I know I’ll be putting together my bar stools, doing my weekly grocery store run, and Zooming with a friend. Perhaps I’ll try to take a walk in a nature preserve? I’d like to spend time at the pool, but I doubt people will be properly social distancing there. Ugh.

What was the high of your week?

Categories: Recurring Series

Friday Questions (v. 18)

Happy Friday! I feel like I’m ready to get back to a somewhat normal blogging schedule, although it’s hard not to bring COVID-19 into my posts. But I think that’s natural and okay! This week, I felt the urge to make a blogging schedule (I’ve basically abandoned all blogging plans since mid-March), so I did that and now have a tentative plan through June. Time will tell if I feel like sticking to it, though.

Today, I wanted to return to one of my fave Friday posts – answering questions from the Real Talk Radio podcast! Let’s dive in. 🙂

1) What’s something that makes you feel the most at home?

I’m going to be super corny here: my cats. They make me feel grounded, less alone, and happy. I love having them to come home to—the six months I spent between Dutch’s death and adopting Eloise were some of the loneliest of my life, mostly because coming home to an empty apartment is downright depressing. I love having these silly, happy girls to hang out with all the time.

2) Describe your current favorite outfit: what’s making you feel most like yourself these days?

Listen, are any of us wearing anything fashionable right now? I’m just not one of those people who wants to get dressed and do my hair and makeup to sit in my apartment all day. That said, I have adopted a “day wear” look. It consists of a pair of soft pajama pants (tencel fabric – almost feels like silk!) that have a really fun pattern and a tank top. It’s so comfy! I don’t know if it’s making me feel “most like myself” but it does make me feel really cozy and happy. 🙂

3) What’s something you’re actively working to get better at?

I’m trying to learn how to not take everything so personally. This is one of my most constant struggles, something I’ve spent hours in therapy discussing. I am extremely sensitive—and this doesn’t just relate to being a Highly Sensitive Person. Being an HSP is more about my nervous system and the way my brain processes outside stimuli. But I’m also inwardly sensitive, in which I take things very personally and perceive things as slights that don’t mean to be. The easiest way to explain it is like this: I was planning a movie date with four friends many months ago. (Remember movie dates?) It was at a theater with assigned seating, so one friend bought his ticket and picked a seat. I bought my ticket and picked the seat next to him. Then the other two friends picked the seats on the other side of him, leaving me alone. Did they mean to pick seats away from me? No. Does it mean they don’t actually like me? No. But I took it deeply personally and felt hurt.

This is an illogical thought pattern. My friends aren’t going out of their way to hurt me or exclude me! That’s silly. Come on, brain! But it’s a defense mechanism because underlying this sensitivity is low self-esteem. That’s what this kind of sensitivity boils down to. It’s this constant worry that my friends don’t like me, that I’m not worthy of their friendship, that they all talk about me behind my back. (I really would have hoped I would have grown out of this by my 30s, but alas.) Logically, I know that none of that is true, but when my sensitivity kicks in and I feel slighted by something a friend said or did (or didn’t say or didn’t do), all of those fears come rushing to the surface.

I don’t want my friends to feel like they need to walk on eggshells around me, or that my feelings are their responsibility. This is my own internal struggle, something I am working hard on breaking down. I want to be able to have normal relationships where every little thing isn’t always dissected and internalized by my brain. Do you know how exhausting that is? It’s so exhausting. So, I’m working on it. I’m trying to take that illogical thought pattern and challenge it when it pops up. (“What facts do I have that support this thought? What facts do I have that do not support this thought?”) I try to remind myself of all the big and tiny ways my friends have shown their love and care. Sometimes, I’ll even talk to a friend that I trust deeply about how I’m feeling. (“Lately, I’ve just been feeling like I don’t matter.”) There’s something really powerful about taking my inner critic out of my head.

4) When you look back on the past few months, what do you feel particularly proud about?

I’m proud that I’ve been able to manage my anxiety quite effectively, even through this global pandemic. I haven’t fallen down rabbit holes of worrying about worst-case scenarios and have remained fairly optimistic through this whole thing. My anxiety definitely has its moments and my sleep has been affected in myriad ways, but overall, it hasn’t been too bad all things considered. This type of situation can wreak havoc on anxiety sufferers because everything feels completely out of our control (especially since our country is led by buffoons) and there’s no clear timeline of what happens next. Florida is reopening, but what happens if cases explode? What is the summer going to look like? the fall? Will I feel safe planning any sort of trip (driving distance) away this year? Will football be back in September? What will it look like if it is? When will I feel safe eating at a restaurant? But even listing out all these questions doesn’t make my anxiety rise. The truth is, the answer to all of them is, I don’t know. And that’s okay.

5) Who’s one person you love following on social media?

I’ve probably mentioned this account before, but it bears repeating because it’s probably the best “dogstagram” – it’s Crusoe the Celebrity Dachshund! Crusoe looks exactly like my Dutchy-Boy, which is probably why I love his account so much, but it’s also such a fun, light-hearted, hilarious Instagram! In the last year, Crusoe became a big brother to Daphne, who has her own account and she lights up my world just as much. (Probably because I dream of having an English cream dachshund one day!) Crusoe also has a Youtube channel and his videos are always hilarious and incredibly well-produced. My mom and I always text each other after a video is released to talk about it and relay our favorite parts! (We’re obsessed.) Anyway, if you want an account to follow that’s just going to make you smile, I definitely suggest Crusoe and Daphne!

Tell me someone you love following on social media!

Categories: Recurring Series

Monthly Budget Update | February 2020

Happy Friday, friends! It’s the end of the month, which means it’s time for another budget check-in. February was a bit of a spend-y month, as I let myself have a little more free rein with my budget because of the sweet tax refund that was deposited in my bank account early last week. Eh, it happens!

I’m still not quite sure I’m budgeting correctly. Scratch that. I know I am not. I am not really following specific parameters for different areas of my finances, which is something I really want to work on in March. It’s just sometimes hard to know when something unexpected is going to pop up! I’m thinking that implementing a cash budget system for “fun money” might help me be more mindful of how much money I’m spending. It’s always a lot harder to keep track of what I’m spending when I use cash, though. Any and all thoughts (well, please be kind, of course) are appreciated!

Anyway, here’s how my spending broke down in February:

Debts (31% – was 33.7% in January) – In the overall picture of my budget, paying off debt was slightly lower than last month but I put a larger chunk of money toward my credit card in February – $1,500 to be exact. (Thanks, tax refund!) This category also comprises my student loans.

Housing (17.6% – was 31.1% in January) – Most of my housing costs remained the same in February, but I didn’t have an Internet bill this month. I have no idea why! It’s really weird, but hey, I’m not going to question it.

Auto (11.1% – was 1.2% in January) – A much higher percentage of my budget this month because my biyearly car insurance was due. This category also included two gas fill-ups.

Spa (5.4% – was 1.1% in January) – I knew this category would be much higher in February because I had a hair appointment scheduled (highlights, cut, blowout—the whole shebang). This also includes a pedicure and the tip for my monthly massage.

Shopping (5.3% – was .9% in January) – Oof, shopping took a way higher percentage this month! This is mainly because I invested in two new bras from Thirdlove ($129 total). I also bought a necklace, two books, new shoes and a shirt for the mud race, a shirt for my book club’s photo shoot, a new purse, and a wallet. Eeks! Definitely need to be more mindful of my spending in March.

Pets (5.2% – was 3.1% in January) – Both girls had their annual vet appointments this month, so I knew this category would bump up a bit. When I had Dutch, he was on Banfield’s “insurance” plan so I never had to worry about paying for office visits, shots, etc., so I wasn’t sure what to expect with the cost of these vet appointments. I was pleasantly surprised! Two office visits and two shots (for Lila; Ellie wasn’t due for any) were around $200. This category also comprises a big bag of litter and a new carrier. (Previously, I was using a very bulky plastic kennel that was awkward to carry. Plus it takes up so much space! After using it for Ellie’s appointment and hating it, I splurged on this carrier that I can hang on my shoulder and folds up easily.)

Eating Out (4.1% – was 3.6% in January) – Lots of eating out this month, but the total percentage is less than I imagined. My food budget is something I’m constantly working on, mostly because I hate to cook and would much rather pick up takeout.

Groceries (4% – was 5.9% in January) – I spent less on groceries this month so that was nice. (But I also ate out more—it all balances out, I guess.)

Savings (3.7% – was 5.6% in January) – I’m pretty sure I saved around the same amount of money as last month, but it was less of my overall budget. This includes dropping $50 into a car savings account, $100 into my apartment savings account, and another $50 into my “no-spend” fund.

Home (2.6% – was 0% in January) – This wasn’t included in my January budget roundup because I didn’t buy anything for my apartment that month. But this month, I used part of my tax refund to buy a cordless vacuum. I also bought a desk organizer and these fun little hexagon-shaped bulletin pieces to hang up over the eventual desk I’m going to have in my room. (This is one of my big goals for March!)

Phone (2.6% – was 4.4% in January) – I spent the same amount on my phone bill this month as last month, but overall, it worked out to be a smaller portion of my budget.

Subscriptions (1.9% – was 2.8% in January) – Just like my phone, I spent the same amount in February as January, just shakes out differently percentage-wise. This includes my subscriptions to Netflix, Spotify, and PicMonkey; my massage membership; my Sephora PLAY! subscription; and the two podcasts I support on Patreon.

Financial (1.2% – was 0% in January) – Another new category for this month. This includes an interest charge on my credit card (ugh) and paying for TurboTax to do my taxes.

Gifts (1.2% – was 0% in January) – Yet another new category! 🙂 This month, I bought a little gift for my “gal”entine as well as a birthday gift for my nephew.

Health (0.9% – was 2.2% in January) – This includes my gym membership as well as some health essentials—ibuprofen, contact solution, and re-wetting drops for contacts. (I could have used my FSA card for the contact essentials, but I totally forgot to swipe the card when I was at Target. Oh well.)

Beauty (0.8% – was 1.3% in January) – This includes micellar water, face wash, toner, a new tube of mascara, BB cream, makeup brush cleaner, and a blending sponge.

Toiletries (0.8% – was 1.5% in January) – This includes many bottles of body wash (for bubble baths), conditioner, and mouthwash.

Donations (0.4% – was 0.6% in January) – My monthly $20 donation to Elizabeth Warren’s campaign.

Household supplies (0.4% – was 0% in January) – I bought toilet paper and a few bottles of hand soap.