1) Read later FTW
A few weeks ago, Elisabeth talked about how she uses the “read later” function on Feedly to mark the blogs she’s read and wants to comment on. She usually reads blog posts on her phone and then waits to comment until she’s in front of a computer. I thought this was a such a great idea! First, it opens up the world of reading blogs from my phone. It’s something I never do because I don’t like commenting from my phone, but now I can just hit “read later” and voila, problem solved! Second, it allows me to read blogs faster because I don’t have to worry about commenting right away. I just click “read later” and come back to it when I have time to comment. Elisabeth, you are a genius!
2) A special birthday
My mom had a very special birthday on Monday, and my brother and I got to celebrate with her on Sunday afternoon. I booked us time at The Candle Pour where we could make candles (this is my third time making candles. I made a coffee-scented candle this time that smells amazing). Then, we went out for dinner in downtown St. Pete and got ice cream at our favorite local shop. It was a great day celebrating the best person I know! It was also really special to have my brother there; we didn’t think he’d be interested in making candles with us but when my mom asked if he wanted to come with us, he said yes. What a delight!
3) Anxiety, my old friend
I haven’t had a major anxiety spiral in quite a while, so I guess I was due for one. This anxiety spiral happened because I couldn’t get ahold of my mom on Saturday so I was convinced she died in her sleep overnight. When these anxiety spirals happen, logic just does not work for me. Sure, I can tell myself that my mom is in good health (better health than me, even!) and she likes to sleep in on Saturdays, and there is a super small chance that she’ll have a brain aneurysm and die suddenly. But it’s that small chance that my anxiety brain will clamp onto. And clamp it did.
Here’s what happened: I texted my mom at 11:00 a.m. to tell her I had booked the workout class we were taking tomorrow. She usually texts back immediately, especially for something like this. Then, I recorded a podcast episode with Bri, all the while keeping an eye on my watch to see if my mom had texted me back. When we finished recording, it had been an hour since I had texted my mom so I Facetimed her. No answer. After 30 minutes, I Facetimed her again. No answer. I was already spiraling, but I started spiraling even more. Thankfully, I was spiraling at Bri’s house. I had come over to record a couple of podcast episodes, and we took a break after the first one to have lunch. Somehow, I managed to choke down the tacos Bri had cooked (not a slight to Bri! I was just so deep in my anxiety that it was hard to eat), and then I knew I wouldn’t be able to do anything productive until my mom called me back. This isn’t the first anxiety spiral Bri has witnessed from me, so she knew the drill. We sat in front of the TV (her husband was watching the EuroCup, which was a great distraction) and Bri also distracted me with conversation. Even though I didn’t contribute much to the conversation, it helped me step outside myself for a bit. In a recent book I read (Abby Jimenez’s Just for the Summer), the author talked about how the main character would get “small” when she was going through a mental health crisis, and that was accurate for me. I felt like I was fully curled up within myself, safely hiding inside my shell, as my brain conjured up all sorts of terrible scenarios. I am so glad I spiraled with Bri because she was able to give me the support I needed.
Eventually, though, my mom did call me. It was only 2 1/2 hours since my original text, which I know for most people isn’t that long to wait for a text back. Sometimes, I take that long to text back! But my mom and I have a different sort of relationship (some may call it co-dependent…) and while I have been doing better about not spiraling when she takes longer to call me back, sometimes the brain is having an off day. It’s a reminder to stay vigilant about my mental health and the next time it happens, to make sure there’s a friend who can be there for me. Being with Bri and Sean made this spiral a bit less stressful and terrible.
4) A decade in the making
Yesterday, I noticed that I had a comment on one of my Goodreads reviews from a long time ago – a whole decade ago, in fact. It was a pretty scathing review for a Harlequin romance, and while I don’t think I would leave such an unkind review today, I was shocked to learn that the author of the book left a snarky comment on my review. Listen, I stand by my review. While I don’t remember anything about this book, if I felt like it was terribly written, it probably was. I didn’t attack this author personally in the review; I was simply honest about how I felt about the book. I don’t leave reviews like this anymore, but 2014 was a different time in the book world. Let this be a lesson to authors: stop reading reviews of your books! Do not under any circumstance read 1-star reviews of your books! And remember, Goodreads is for readers, not authors. *steps off soapbox*
5) Weekend plans
This weekend should be a good one! Tonight, I have plans with a few friends to go see Inside Out 2 (yes, we’re in our thirties without children, and yes, this is what we choose to do on a Friday night). Tomorrow, I have my writing date with Mikaela and then game night with the fam. And Sunday, all I have on the agenda is a workout class. Yay!
ROTFL that it took the author ONE DECADE to come up with a response to your comment. Just sayin’ that alone validates your review. Of course there are things that all of us wish that we hadn’t said on the internets, but also they can’t all be 5 star reviews.
It’s just not healthy to go seeking out those 1-star reviews and leaving comments. I just wanted to tell this author to get off the Internet for today, oof.
I’ve never tried the “read later” function on Feedly and couldn’t tell you why I’ve never used it. New days, new ways.
I want to see Inside Out 2, too. I’m child-free but I don’t see why that should stop me! Happy Weekend.
I only used “Read Later” to bookmark posts but then I never actually used them after bookmarking them, so I cleared it out and started using it as my commenting backlog. I love it!
Oh, I actually feel really sad for that author, that they felt the need to do that 10 years later. I mean, I’m really glad you felt the way you did about it, that it didn’t bother you! And you’re totally right that Goodreads is for readers and not authors. But, oh, that person’s head can’t be in a good place right now.
I really wonder what caused her to start looking up reviews of her books! That’s not a healthy space to be!
Well, my husband went to see Inside Out 2 by himself and enjoyed it! Definitely not just for kids.
Happy Birthday to your mom (and tell her to check her texts more often, ha ha…) Seriously, sorry about that anxiety spiral. I’m glad everything was okay and it was relatively short-lived!
Enjoy your weekend! It sounds fun.
I feel like the Inside Out movies are much better suited for adults than children, haha. EMOTIONS!
She was sleeping, which is why she took forever to respond to her text. Which is what usually happens, but my brain immediately goes to “dead.”
I would totally go and see Inside Out 2. I just watched the first one a couple of weeks ago with Paul. He’s a bit young for the movie – I definitely enjoyed it more than he did.
I had an author respond to my goodreads review once. I had commented on how poorly the book was edited and she said something like “you can dislike my book, but don’t insult the editing process.” In that case, I had dog-eared the pages with typos so I could write back and give examples of the errors. But I also no longer leave negative reviews, or really reviews at all these days! I mostly just rate the book and move on.
The Inside Out movies definitely feel like they’re made for adults rather than kids! Ha. So many emotions!
Oh boy… that’s an odd comment to receive! Authors should not be cruising Goodreads to look at reviews and should not comment on reviews at all! I’m the same way – it’s rare for me to leave a review, or if I do, it’s 1-2 sentences.
Happy birthday to your mom! Also, sorry about your anxiety spiral, I’m glad you had Bri there for you.
That’s kind of wild about the Goodreads review! I almost never read reviews because I find they always deviate so much from my own feelings about books, and I don’t think it’s healthy for authors to read those reviews. Particularly from 10 years ago!!!
My toxic reading trait is that I love reading 1- and 2-star reviews for books that are really popular, especially if I’m not enjoying the book. It makes me feel less crazy, haha. Book reviews can be really helpful – for readers. Authors should just take a big step back, particularly for their mental health!
I’m so glad you found my little “read later” hack useful! I actually really enjoy reading blogs on my phone at leisure but HATE commenting on my phone. My husband was incredulous I could remember later what I had wanted to say in response to a blog post, but I have an excellent memory for things like this so it’s never a problem for me.
I’ve never gone to a candle pour place, but it sounds like so much fun.
I’m sorry about the anxiety attack. It’s almost impossible to describe to someone who has never experienced it, but I have experienced it and it’s so awful. Hugs.
I hope to go see Inside Out 2 next week! Admittedly with my 9-year-old, but I’m more excited about it than he is 🙂
Yes – remembering what I want to comment on is never an issue for me either. Sometimes I need to lightly peruse the blog again to remember what I wanted to say, but it quickly comes back to me. I love this hack – thank you for sharing!
Thanks for the anxiety empathy – I know you get it. <3
I think Elisabeth’s use of the ‘read later’ function is genius. I have been using the function to “bookmark” blog posts I wanted to refer back to later (but to link to them or quote them, not to leave comments).
I am so sorry you had an anxiety attack when your mom didn’t respond to your text right away but I am really glad you were at Bri’s house when it happened.
I was using “read later” to bookmark posts, too, but then realizing I wasn’t really using it to refer to those posts. I had a LOT of posts from people who aren’t even blogging anymore! It’s been so useful for me to use it as a commenting backlog!
Thanks, friend. <3 Anxiety attacks are not my favorite, but they happen.
I use “keep unread” for that purpose, no matter on what device I read, to remind me I want to comment later. Commenting on the phone SUCKS.
I am so glad your brother went with to celebrate your mom! <3
I'm so glad you were with Bri when that spiral happened. <3
OMG I saw that Goodreads review! It showed up in my feed and I didn't realize it was the author. Just, yeah, OMG. It was so cringe when I first read it and now it's SUPER cringe.
I’m so curious about “keep unread.” I feel like it would clog up my feed – I get stressed when there are too many posts that are unread in Feedly, lol. But I guess if you know that some of those just need to be commented on, it works!
Sooo cringe. Ahhh.
Way back in 2009 I reviewed a book, The Hearts of Horses, on my blog, and the author read my review! I was so amazed! I mean, clearly she was googling herself and the book. She left this comment:
Thanks for this lovely post. You’ve done a better job of describing the shape and feel of the book than most other reviewers.
That made my day, for sure!
I’m so sorry you had that anxiety spiral. I’ve never gone through that, though I can be decent at catastrophic thinking and it sucks.
That’s a great review! I think authors should absolute read the glowing 5-star reviews of their books. But not the 1-star reviews. That’s not good for anyone’s mental health!
Anxiety spirals SUCK. I am very glad you haven’t been through one!
I spiral ij exactly this same way! Also– candle pouring– so fun!
This makes me feel less alone – thank you for this comment, Sarah! <3