1) First and foremost, I want to thank everyone who has offered their condolences for the loss of my grandma. The past week and a half have been the worst of my life, and it’s been the support from family and friends that have helped me get through it. I feel like I cry at the drop of a hat now – just a hug can make me start bawling! Grief is a weird business, and I feel like I’m only at the beginning of it.
2) I’m really glad I decided to go to the hospital with my mom two Sundays ago when we found out my grandma had been admitted back. It was the last time I was able to have a real conversation with her. And she looked amazing then! She ate an entire bowl of broth and a pudding cup, was able to conversate easily, etc. And the last conversation I had with her was her asking me how my new apartment is. This lady was in the hospital battling an infection and she still wanted to hear all about my life. That’s who my grandma was in a nutshell. Always concerned about others, always interested in their lives.
3) At my grandma’s memorial, as my grandpa went up to her casket to say his last goodbyes, his words to her were: “Four days in heaven, Barbara. How awesome is that?” The strength of his faith has always amazed me, but he’s blowing me away with how he’s handling this loss. Of course, he’s devastated, but he still has hope and faith and trust. It’s incredibly inspiring.
4) Here’s a Bible verse my cousin found that has brought me great comfort this week: “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” (Psalm 34:18) For anyone going through a hard time, whether grieving a loved one, a dream, a relationship, I hope that verse also brings you hope.
5) I’ve been so drained this week, so emotionally exhausted. I’m ready to have a low-key and relaxing weekend. My only plans are to watch my nephew’s soccer game on Saturday afternoon and hang out with my brother watching football on Sunday. Lots of sleep, TV watching, and reading on the docket, exactly what I need!
I need to hear something cheerful. Tell me something good that happened with you this week!
I’m really sorry to hear about the loss of your Grandma :(. Losing a loved one is such a tough thing to go through, especially when that loved one was close to you. Your grandmother sounds like she was a fighter and an amazing woman, and reading her story, about the kind of person she was, is inspiring. I lost my only grandmother to bone cancer 5 years ago, and while her life story was a rather sad and lonely one, she was close to me and my family, always had a kind word and hug to share, and in her best moments gave peace to my grandfather. He was so devout in caring for her in her last years of life – nothing could break them apart, no matter how tumultuous their marriage had been. I have faith that both of our grandmothers are in heaven and that they are watching over us always. Yours, and mine, can can be sources of strength and courage in our lives forever.
As for something good that happened to me this week – my best friend came over last night and painted my nails for my sister’s wedding. Her wedding is tomorrow and the excitement is building! In the end, I couldn’t be more pleased to be her Maid of Honour.
Thank you for sharing the Bible quote as well. It lifted my spirits some as I trudge through a very tough week in my life. I am grieving the loss of my job due to an unexpected lay-off. I wasn’t planning on having to start again so soon, but maybe a new path will open up for me.
Take care, hugs, and enjoy your relaxing weekend!
Hi Stephany! I have been reading your blog for a year or so but haven’t left a comment before. I want to offer my condolences on the passing of your grandma, who sounds like a wonderful and loving family member. I also want to tell you that I really enjoy your blog, and that I admire the way you live your life (as least as far as I can tell from the blog 🙂 ). Your posts show someone who is thoughtful, true to herself, dedicated to her family members, a loyal friend, an avid reader, and a hard worker. I enjoy reading about your goal-setting and progress – I think it’s great to live as explicitly intentionally as you seem to. I subscribe to a lot of blogs but to be honest find many of them increasingly boring because I find bloggers more and more often are only sharing very superficial information, whereas what I love about blogs is the insight they offer into the way that other people experience their lives. Your blog is one of my favourites because it’s honest and insightful. Now, if I may presume to offer a bit of advice (coming from someone who has lived in many places and traveled a lot), I encourage you to be bold and continue take risks – like moving into a new apartment like you just did or travelling further afield or trying to get your fiction published! You seem to me like a very tough and resilient person and I could can probably handle more than you think.
Hugs and hugs and hugs. I’m so sorry again. I’m glad you have a relaxing weekend ahead of you.
Something good that happened this week: Two great media tastings and a movie date night last night. I have been really stringent on my budget so I feel like I haven’t gone to the movie in months! But I was recently gifted a card so it only cost us 3 dollars.
Something good that happened this week… putting together a package to send to the girls for Halloween! I love finding little fun gifts for them that I know they will love. Excited to put it in the mail to them tomorrow (assuming the stupid post office doesn’t mess it up! Ha).
Other than that, I ran into my neighbors up the street on Monday night and their oldest (she’s 2) wanted to hold my hand the whole way around the block. It was such a sweet and precious moment that we went around twice as I loved that she was comfortable/trusted me to hold her hand. When we were done walking she invited me into her house with the sweetest look on her face. Little ones make things so much fun!
I’m so glad you’ve had some good support to help you through this loss. There is nothing harder than losing a loved one. Thinking of you. <3
I am glad you are feeling the love of others. I have been thinking of you as I know how hard it is to lose a grandparent that you are so close to. Lots of people are thinking of you and sending love and prayers so I hope you continue to feel the love of others. I am glad you have a quiet weekend ahead of you. Grief is so exhausting and you have been through so much!
Something cheerful – I am having a great trip to Miami with my family!! We are loving south beach. My dad had to get admitted to the hospital last night with a bad infection though so it’s been stressful for my mom/us but luckily we have other family that has been able to help as my dad insists that she stay here!
I’m so sorry to hear of your grandma’s passing, & of course it’s made for a rough week for you. I’m glad you went to see her; you’ll cherish that forever, truly. My mom encouraged me not to come home when my grandma was in hospice, but I made the 16-hour drive & as awful as it was – & as awful as she clearly felt – it was absolutely worth it to have seen her just one last time. I will always be glad I did it.
Some good things… ummm… this week I tried Caramel Apple Twizzlers & they’re amazing. Does that count?! And I bought really cute snowboots for only $35 instead of their usual $100!
I’m so glad you are feeling the support of your community during this incredibly difficult time. So sorry you’re going through this! I hope you had a good, restful and low key weekend just like you planned. xoxo