Happy Friday and Happy Valentine’s Day! I have today off work, but not for fun reasons. I have an orthopedic appointment this morning and a vet appointment for Eloise this afternoon (just her annual wellness visit). Let’s hope my ortho has good news for me and Eloise doesn’t put up too much of a fuss about being at the vet. (She’s usually pretty chill, even at the vet, so she should be fine.)
I have more questions from the Real Talk Radio podcast to answer today! One of my favorite post series. <3
1) What’s something you do purely for fun and joy?
Writing this blog! I don’t do this for money—as I’ve said before, it’s a hobby that actually costs me money with hosting fees and all that. I’m not interested in growing my blog into a business or using it to further my career; I just love having a space to come to and chat about my life. I love the friendships I’ve made from blogging and how strong those bonds are. I love the catharsis of writing about my life and getting advice and feedback from other people. Writing this blog is so much fun for me; I wouldn’t do it if it wasn’t fun. I love thinking about blog topics and writing posts and creating graphics. I’ve been writing this blog for over a decade now and I tell myself I’ll stop when it’s no longer fun, and I am so, so grateful that time has yet to come.
2) What’s one boundary of yours that’s important to you and what does it look like in your real life to enforce it?
My alone time. I guard my alone time fiercely because it’s the #1 thing I need in order to keep my anxiety at bay. This means I say no to plans on a fairly frequent basis. I know that can be annoying to some friends, but pleasing everyone is never an achievable goal and I have to take care of myself first and foremost. I try to only make weeknight plans once a week (twice at most) and then 1-2 plans on the weekends. And if I have plans on a weekend, let’s say I make plans for a Saturday night, then I’ll keep my Saturday morning/afternoon free so I can make sure my batteries are fully charged before then. My alone time is so sacred to me and it’s the boundary that I have no problem enforcing in my relationships.
3) What are three things you are grateful for lately?
- Work friends – I went through a period in 2018 and a good part of 2019 where I felt a little adrift at work as all my close work friends left for new jobs. It was a hard transition period, as I had gone from having seven or eight coworkers to talk to on a daily basis and vent about work issues to… none. But things have shifted for me and I’ve found a new group of close work friends. This makes me really happy because I am someone who needs friends at work. I do not thrive in a solitary work environment. I need buddies to chat with and have lunch with and vent to. I’m so glad I’ve found that again!
- A loved one feeling better – I’m not going to get into specifics here as it’s not my story to tell, but I am so, so grateful for this after months of worry and fear.
- Great sleep – I have been implementing a nighttime routine this week (finally!) and it’s been going really well. I’m usually crawling into bed by 9:15 to read (one night, I was in bed by 8:45!) and getting a solid 7-8 hours of sleep. It’s divine!
4) What’s one thing you do in your most important relationships that keeps them strong and happy?
I will admit that I am still learning how to be a good friend, and I have my own hangups about friendship that I am constantly talking about in therapy. (Mostly me saying, “I think all my friends hate me,” and my therapist countering, asking me what evidence I have that supports that theory and me mumbling, “None. But it’s probably true.”) Back in high school, I had a lot of one-sided friendships that fell away during college and it took me a long time to be able to trust people again and want to put effort into my friendships.
Anyway, I am in a much better place now and have a cohort of close girlfriends who mean the world to me. I try to regularly check in with them through text and make sure to plan things with them, like one-on-one dates or happy hours and such. It’s always hard to balance time with my girlfriends with the alone time I crave, but I try to make it work. Just as having too many plans makes my anxiety ratchet up, too much alone time makes my mood dip drastically. A good balance is key.
5) What’s the last thing you felt really excited about?
Lol, my tax refund. It’s the first time in three or four years that I haven’t had to report freelance earnings, so I was pleasantly surprised with my refund this year! It’ll allow me to nearly pay off my credit card, although I think I’m going to set aside a small portion of my refund to buy myself something special. (And by “something special,” I mean a cordless vacuum because that’s what I’ve been dreaming about lately. It’s really true what they say, adults are so friggin boring.)
What’s the last thing you felt really excited about?
Kim
Yay for the tax refund! I know lots of people who rave about cordless vacuums! You will have to tell us about the one you get. I am curious about battery life (I’ve heard they don’t last long and I sometimes vacuum for 20-30 mins!).
I am glad your family member is doing better, and you have good friends at work again 🙂 That’s important to me too. I can say that about a lot of the things on this list – having people to talk to, the right amount of sleep, the right amount of alone time balanced with together time 😉 We are planning a road trip with friends this summer and when we plan it I need to tell them up front I need an hour or two to myself each day.
I blog for the same reasons. It was sad years ago when A LOT of my blogger friends went toward monetizing their blogs and their content just went to crap. 🙁 Ha.
I hope your appointments go well today!
Hmm, last thing I felt excited about… probably getting a hot chai this am! It was -4 for my walk to the office!
Suzanne
Good luck at your appointments!
I am 100% with you on the boundary. Alone time is SO important to me.
tinna
Great questions! Which episode is this from? I love RTR also! I’m hoping for a tax refund this year, but it’s looking closer to a payment. 🙁
Lisa of Lisa's Yarns
Oh how I miss the days of tax refunds. I always got big ones before getting married. Those were the days! Now we tend to owe quite a bit which is depressing, but oh well. I am grateful for the services we receive as citizens of this state/country! I try to keep that in mind when I think about how much of our money goes to the government!
I’m glad you have a new batch of friends at work. Having friends at work is so important! I love my coworkers and they make my job way more fun!
The last thing I was really excited for… hmmmm…. I would say my date night with Phil on Saturday night. It was nice to get out for an evening and enjoy a really really delicious meal!
San
Oh, alone time is so important (especially for us introverts! I totally agree!). And I am with you on the whole “blogging just for fun and joy” thing…. I have thought about how I could monetize my blog, but then, I don’t really want to. I want to do my own thing!! 😉
The last thing I was really excited about … a friend booking a flight to come visit! 🙂