I mentioned before that I participated in The Holiday Council 2012 with Molly Maher of Stratejoy. This is my second year of participating. Last year, I didn’t fully dive into the worksheets and challenges and I wanted to really focus on completing this course this year. After all, I paid money so I can’t let it go to waste. The Holiday Council, for those who are unaware, is 3 weeks of dreaming and scheming for the new year. Between brainstorming worksheets, the special Facebook group where community is formed and dreams are revealed, and the weekly one-hour training calls, you review the good and bad of the year and begin to unravel and discover what you want out of the following year. For someone who geeks out over goal-setting and planning worksheets, it fills me with so much joy and passion.
One of the major pieces of The Holiday Council is creating a theme for the year. I’ve done this in years past, where I develop one word I want my year to embody (2011’s was risk while 2012’s word was health). This year, though, I wanted to find a theme to wrap my year around. Something that isn’t vague but focused, something that embodies all the different priorities I have for the year.
After much deliberation, going back and forth on different themes (“Embrace the Moment!” “Believe in Myself!”), it was as I was writing down my top priorities for the year and seeing a common thread.
do the work
I desperately want this upcoming year to be one of change. Change in my physical health, in my social life, in the way I attack writing projects, in my finances, in my dependence level on my mom. How do we change? One of the mantras that has always stuck with me is something Dolvett, a trainer on The Biggest Loser, constantly chants to his team: Hard work. Dedication. That is how we change. By putting in the work and being dedicated to the cause.
I know I am not broken, nor do I need to be fixed. I know my self-worth comes directly from me – not from being skinny or having lots of friends or snagging that super cool writing project. I want to achieve those things and I want to chase after them because they are important to me – but I know the Stephany of the present is good enough. She is vibrant and lovely and beautiful. She deserves the best out of life.
Do The Work means focusing on losing weight and being healthier. It means exercising regularly and to stop letting laziness fuel my tomorrow. It means stepping out of my comfort zone to ask girls I could see myself being friends with on girl dates and forming relationships. It means being more social, and opening myself up more to new opportunities. It means getting serious about freelancing and writing a novel. It means putting myself on a strict budget and sticking to it, as I figure out a way to afford a car and pay off my medical bill from that crazy ER visit two years ago. It means a year of less sugar, less shopping, less travel.
Another part of The Holiday Council is these interviews Molly has with ridiculously awesome individuals. One interview was with Ash Ambirge of The Middle Finger Project who said that one of the things she does to evaluate her year is to think, “What makes me feel like an asshole for not accomplishing this year?” I thought that was just so great because seriously: there are goals we set for ourselves and when we don’t complete them, we do feel like assholes! (I love how honest she is!) I can freely admit I feel like an asshole because I’m ending the year heavier than when I began it. I feel like an asshole for being stupid about the way I spend my money. I feel like an asshole because I’m 25 and just now realizing how much I depend on my mom for so much. I feel like an asshole for believing in the lies that my writing just isn’t good enough for publication.
I don’t want to feel like an asshole about these things in 2013. (And wheeeee, this is the most curse-filled post I’ve ever written!) I want to focus on the above for this upcoming year as I embark on a year of change. A year of doing the work that needs to be done to change.
One of the fun challenges Molly wanted us to do is to create a vision board. I’ve actually never created one but I’ve always wanted to. I sat down with a stack of magazines (since I don’t subscribe to any magazines, I had to make do with my mom’s Good Housekeeping and her one copy of Women’s Running Magazine that she received at a race, ha!) and starting tearing out pages that spoke to me. Celebrities that I adore, pretty flowers, words that inspire me, foods I want to incorporate more in my diet, people exercising. And a wrinkly little dog because he’s too cute!
Not too shabby for my first time, especially since I’m not the most creative person ever. Also, I feel like I should mention having Zooey Deschanel front and center. I actually didn’t realize that was her until later… I just loved the picture so much since it exudes happiness and health and light.
Do you have a theme – or a word – for 2013?
Ha, that asshole concept is one that really works well! I think we all have things that we feel like an asshole for… I feel like an asshole for not paying off more of my student loans last year. That is something I really need to tackle this year so I can feel better about my financial situation. I am not in a bad place, i am just disappointed that i am almost 32 and haven’t paid them off.
I think I have to borrow your theme for 2013 and say mine would be similar. I need to do the work so I can get through the CFA… That is my big focus for 2013. I am so freaking sick of giving my life over to the CFA every year for 5 months, so I need to put in the time one more time and get this exam over with for good!!
I tend to make this big, crazy goals but then forget that in order to achieve them, it’s going to take work. A lot of work. A lot of hard work that sometimes I don’t really want to do. So I think this theme will keep me centered on what I need to do to achieve what I want to achieve.
I am SO excited for you to be FINISHED with CFA studying this year. Paris is at the end of this, yes? I know the studying is going to SUCK but just think of what awaits you at the end. I will be praying for you over these next 5 months!
This is a really interesting take on approaching a new year, I like it! I think your theme is perfect for you & all the work you’ve put into this project has really motivated you, which is great. Can’t wait to see how 2013 unfolds for you 🙂
Why, thank you! I had a hard time coming up with a theme. In the words of Molly, it needs to push me out of my comfort zone but still excite me. And I think the other ones felt so cliche and not right for me. This theme speaks to me. And it focuses me on the fact that if I want to be different at the end of 2013, I need to put in a lot of hard work. Should be fun? 😉
I’m a Zooey Deschanel fan girl and didn’t recognize her in this photo either! Fantastic vision board and the wrinkly dog is a good addition. I think “do the work” should be a focus for everyone!
The wrinkly dog just makes everything better, doesn’t he? 🙂
Love your theme for the new year! I’m still working on mine. Also, I definitely didn’t realize that was Zooey Deschanel and I LOVE her, weird!
It wasn’t until I saw a caption that I realized it was her. I just thought the photo was so pretty and vibrant! Ah, well. I love Zooey, too, so it’s no issue.
I like the theme or word idea. My word for 2012 was definitely “change”. For 2013, I am thinking the theme will be “grow”.
Wonderful theme for the year! I’ve learned this year that you can achieve anything if you are willing to put in the work. You will reach all of your goals, I know it! 🙂
This post made me think of something Bill said to me awhile back. He’s big on setting extremely specific goals for races, where as I am… not. When he asked me what my goal was for a certain race, I told him my goal was to finish with a smile. After answering his question with that answer a few times, he finally said something that really stuck with me. He said that at the end of the race I shouldn’t be smiling. At the end of the race I should feel exhausted and wore out because I pushed myself *that hard* and that has really stuck with me! So, my theme for the next year will be something along those lines and similar to yours. Pushing myself beyond my so called limits!
Happy New Year to you Stephany! I know you will continue to do great things in 2013!
I really like what Bill said! It’s very true. I think, for some people, it’s okay to have a goal like that. Especially when you don’t have a particularly specific race goal. (Like if I were to run a half-marathon, finishing the race with a smile WOULD be a goal for me!) I really want this to be the year I put in the hard work and see it pay off. I get so lazy with certain goals I have and I forget that in order to see big change in my life, I have to do the work. The hard work that isn’t always fun. Here’s to a powerful 2013 for both of us!
I love your theme for 2013! I can totally relate, too. I always tell myself “I want to do this” or “I want to do that,” but don’t always make the initiative to get it done. I need to do the work, too!
Yes! It’s such a special theme for me, because I tend to set these high (totally achievable) goals… but then it gets hard and I get lazy and those goals just sit there. I forget that in order to achieve my big goals (losing weight, making new friends, being better at my money), I have to put in the work, write down the steps, and just get serious about it. We can absolutely achieve whatever goal we set for ourselves… we just have to put in the work to do so!
“…stop letting laziness fuel my tomorrow.” I LOVE THIS. I think this is a great theme for you – I’m excited to see what it brings!
I’m still finishing up the Holiday Council calls because my December kind of went to shit (I decided to get into your theme of cussing – ha!), and my theme is still presenting itself (made my vision board last night), but the word “shimmer” keeps surfacing, so I think that’s going to be used somehow. I think this year is going to be about gentleness with myself. The end of 2012 was really hard on me (mostly because of all this fertility stuff), and for the first time I think ever my year is going to have an inward, not an outward focus which is a little strange to an extrovert like me!
I love your idea of being gentle with yourself. I think that is a fabulous goal to have – especially with all you’re dealing with. You’re on my prayer list, friend!
I love your vision board! It was actually seeing that you’d done this that helped prompt the idea for making the cork board project in my room. I can’t wait to start putting it together!
Oh, I also really love the idea of “do the work.” My favorite line from this post is, “I know the Stephany of the present is good enough. She is vibrant and lovely and beautiful. She deserves the best out of life.” It makes me happy to see you’ve come to this realization. 🙂 It can be so hard getting to a place where we’re truly happy with ourselves, and I feel like I’m still trying to get to that point. My first day of cracking down on my New Year’s goals hasn’t gone too shabby, but I feel wary of calling them New Year’s goals. I just want them to be life goals, things I strive to achieve. Sometimes I feel like putting the words New Year’s into the mix can jinx good intentions. Maybe that’s just me being pessimistic, though. That’s quite likely. Anyway, your “do the work” theme is very similar to Ashley’s (@writetoreach) theme of “show the work.” They’re both mantras I can respect and want to do more of. I think you are definitely headed in the right direction. 🙂
I think I’ve taken the pressure off “resolutions” and, though I call them that, they are simply intentions for the next 12 months. Things I really want to accomplish but I know I won’t cross off every single one. This year, I just want to put in the hard work because I think I’m ready for it.
And you, my friend, are vibrant and lovely and beautiful. And YOU deserve the best out of life.