Stephany Writes

Categories: Best Of

Best of 2023 | End-of-Year Survey

Hi, friends! I have another Best of 2023 post for you guys today—my annual end-of-year survey! I started doing this survey years ago (I wish I could credit the original author!), and I have added and removed many questions throughout the years. I love that this survey allows me to reflect on the year and also remember all of the good things that happened that I want to remember.

1) What did you do in 2023 that you’ve never done before? 

  • Got LASIK
  • Attended a murder mystery party
  • Saw TAYLOR SWIFT in concert
  • Attended a Pride parade
  • Made pottery
  • Fed a zebra

2) Did anyone close to you give birth?

No.

3) Did anyone close to you die?

Yes, we lost my uncle on December 12th.

4) What places did you visit?

Charleston, South Carolina in July and Gatlinburg, Tennessee in December.

5) What would you like to have in 2024 that you didn’t have in 2023?

Better sleep habits, a longer attention span, and less worrying about my mom.

6) What dates from 2023 will be etched in your memory forever?

The day my uncle died. I will never forget waking up to that text from my cousin.

I’ll also never forget the day I got LASIK!

7) What was your biggest achievement this year?

I really got a handle on my anxiety in 2023! Reading through my line-a-day journal, my entries from the end of 2022/beginning of 2023 tell a story of immense anxiety and panic attacks. All I wanted from 2023 was to feel less impacted by my anxiety disorder, and I am proud to say that’s how I feel as 2024 begins. I started seeing a psychiatrist who changed up my meds, went to regular therapy, and really committed to the work of helping myself. What helped the most? Probably medication, if I’m being honest, but talk therapy also helped me better understand my tendency to spiral.

8) What was your biggest challenge?

I struggled with inertia and laziness this year. I wasn’t able to meet some of the fitness-related goals I set for myself because I just lost the motivation to do any of them.

9) Did you suffer from illness or injury?

I was diagnosed with scalp psoriasis, which entails treating the affected areas with a topical steroid multiple times a week. I had a head cold in December. I had to get two moles removed, which entailed stitches and left the area very tender for a few weeks. And plantar fasciitis reared its ugly head.

10) What was the best thing you bought?

My big beautiful bed! I waited a long time to get a new bed, but it is just so comfortable and cozy.

11) Where did most of your money go?

Rent and food.

12) What did you get really, really excited about?

I always get excited before traveling, so I had lots of anticipation leading up to my trips to South Carolina and Tennessee. And I got excited during the holiday season, when things were going well during my relationship, and for book club adventures.

13) What authors did you discover in 2023?

Here are some of the best debut authors I read in 2023:

  • Brendan Slocumb – The Violin Conspiracy and his follow-up Symphony of Secrets
  • Kate Spencer – In a New York Minute
  • Jessica George – Maame
  • Falon Ballard – Just My Type
  • TJ Newman – Falling and her follow-up Drowning
  • Cat Shook – If We’re Being Honest
  • Lauren McBrayer – Like a House on Fire

14) What do you wish you had done more of? 

I wish I had said yes to plans with friends more often, gone on more walks outside, played with the cats more, and saved more money.

15) What do you wish you had done less of?

Less worrying about situations that have not happened or that I have no control over. I also wish I had done less revenge bedtime procrastination.

16) How did you spend Christmas?

Well, Christmas Day was spent quite differently than usual because I spent it alone at home, getting prepared for my TN trip. But Christmas Eve was fun! I went over to my mom’s around 11 and my brother and his family came over shortly after me. We had a hearty lunch and then opened presents. I was so spoiled this year, including with a brand-new Chromebook that I’m typing this post on. Afterward, we had dessert and then my brother and his family left. I stayed because later that night, we had reservations at a fancy steakhouse so we enjoyed some seriously good food to end the day!

17) What was your favorite TV program?

So many good ones this year, but I think Jury Duty was hands-down one of the best TV experiences for me in 2023. There is no one on the planet like Ronald! What a unique concept!

18) What did you want and get?

I wanted my anxiety disorder to be more stable, and I got that.

I wanted to go on more dates and while I only ended up going on three first dates, I did have a lovely five-month relationship with a wonderful person. I’m glad I got to have that this year!

I wanted to have a better relationship with food and I definitely put in the work to get there. I started working with a dietician and have learned so much about how to fuel my body in a satisfying and nourishing way.

19) What did you want and not get?

I wanted better nighttime habits and that continued to be a struggle.

I wanted long-term romantic love and that didn’t work out for me.

I wanted to reach out to friends more and I didn’t do that.

20) What was your favorite film of 2023?

BARBIE! I saw it twice in theaters.

21) What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

I turned 36 this year and I celebrated with a Day of Stephany. I slept in, met my mom for lunch, went to the bookstore and bought two books, went to Starbucks for my free birthday drink and to read my book for about an hour, got a facial, and then had dinner with my family in the evening. It was such a lovely day!

22) What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

If I had established a better daily routine for myself. I felt all over the place sometimes when it came to my mornings, work schedule, and my nighttime routine. I need to get into a routine that works for me this year.

23) Who kept you sane?

My psychiatrist and therapist? Ha. Mad props to them for listening to me jabber on and on for almost an entire year.

My mom also keeps me sane on a regular basis. The reason I sometimes feel insane is because I’m worrying about her so it always felt like the biggest rush of dopamine to see her face on my phone (through Facetime), healthy and happy and whole, when I’ve been panicking about something happening to her.

24) What are five things you are grateful for this year?

  • Medication – What an amazing thing is it to have these tiny little pills that can change our mental health dramatically! I am so very grateful that I am able to afford medication and see a psychiatrist that cares deeply about helping me feel better.
  • Coming out – I finally came out to some friends and family members this year. I’m always so worried about how my bisexuality will affect the way people look at me, but I received nothing but love and support from everyone. Not everyone gets to have that.
  • New experiences – I have social anxiety, which means even the simplest social event can be super difficult for me. And it means it is tremendously difficult for me to try new things, like attending a new book club. But with a friend at my side, I went to Silent Book Club’s January meeting where I met a whole bunch of new people and got to have delightfully bookish conversation, and I ended up attending their meetings almost every month for the entire year.
  • Bloglandia – The community we have all collectively built here grows even stronger each year that passes and I am so grateful for all of you. The loneliness episodes I have dealt with are often mitigated when I open up Feedly to see so many blog posts to read and interact with, or when I open up my blog to see comments to respond to. I love this community!
  • My nutritionist – It has been eye-opening to work with a nutritionist who is anti-diet culture and committed to helping me eat in a way that feels satisfying. She has helped me learn a lot about how to properly fuel my body and give it the nourishment it needs without putting myself on a strict diet.

25) Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2023.

Trust that your people have your back. One of the scariest parts of coming out is that you don’t know how people will react. Will they be happy for you, or will it forever alter your relationship with them? I was most worried about coming out to my brother because I wasn’t sure how he would react. But every single time I came out, I was met with kindness and grace and happiness. The people in my life want me to be my truest self, and if that includes a queer identity, then let that pride flag fly high. My brother sought me out a week after I came out to him to let me know he was happy for me and there’s nothing I could say to him that would change our relationship. <3

26) What would you rate your level of happiness on a scale of 1-10 this year?

I’d probably give it a 7, which is one point better than last year! On the happiness front, this year was a pretty good one. Sure, I battled my anxiety disorder and dealt with loneliness at times, but overall, I had a good year and I felt happy and whole for the majority of it. I’m grateful I can say that!

27) If you could change one thing that happened this year, what would it be?

My uncle wouldn’t have gotten cancer and he wouldn’t have died a mere 8 months from his diagnosis. Life was so cruel to my family this year.

28) How have you changed over this past year?

I think I’ve settled more into myself this year. Every year, I seem to become more and more comfortable in my skin and this year was no different. Being able to live as my full self has been an amazing gift, one I spent a lot of time dreaming about but never believing I could actually have. And I’ve continued my journey of fat acceptance and enjoying the person I am as she looks today. I’m not shying away from pictures or full-body shots because I don’t want to see myself in that way. That’s just silly. This is what I look like! And I want to have those memories to look back on.

29) How did this year surprise you? 

I did not expect to lose my uncle this year, that’s for sure. I didn’t expect to get LASIK. I didn’t expect to be in a relationship throughout the majority of the spring and summer. There was a lot about this year that was surprising, both good and bad. But, of course, the biggest surprise was my uncle’s cancer diagnosis and death. We did not expect to lose him so soon.

30) Show us one of your favorite photos from the year.

What’s a life lesson you learned in 2023?

Categories: Best Of

Best of 2023 | Wrapping Up My 2023 Goals

APARTMENT (3/5 complete)

1) Move to a two-bedroom apartment – Not complete. I ended up staying in my one-bedroom apartment for at least another year because my rent didn’t increase this year.

2) Hire movers for my move – N/A

3) Change up my entryway – Complete!

4) Buy a new mattress and bedframe – Complete!

5) Create a favorite books bookshelf. Complete!

HEALTH (1/5 complete)

1) Go for a walk every day – Not complete. My percentage was pretty pitiful.

2) Complete 100 Peloton workouts – I only managed around 60ish Peloton workouts this year. Another pitiful attempt.

3) Drink at least one bottle (16 oz) of water every day – Not complete. Your girl was struggling in this category.

4) Get a sleep study done – Not complete. I never made an appointment with my PCP to get a referral.

5) Research my options for LASIK. Complete! And I went ahead with the surgery, too! I have new eyeballs!

6) Establish a better morning and nighttime routine. Not complete. This is definitely something I want to focus on in 2024. (Of course, I said this in 2023, so…)

MONEY (0/4 complete)

1) Have $3,000 saved in my CapitalOne emergency fund and $500 in my bank emergency fund by the end of the year. Not complete.

2) Switch to a rewards credit card. Not complete.

3) Start doing monthly budget recaps again. Not complete.

4) Donate $50 to the following three charities every quarter: Friends of Strays, the Tampa Bay Abortion Fund, and CASA. Not complete.

HOBBIES (5/7 complete)

1) Read 100 books. (116/100) Crushed this goal.

2) Complete the A-Z reading challenge. (26/26) Complete! Huge thank you to Engie for helping me find books for some of the harder letters like V and Z.

3) Publish podcast seasons regularly throughout the year. Complete! We released season 3 in January/February, season 4 in March/April, season 5 in June/July, season 6 in September/October, and season 7 in November/December.

4) Post to our podcast Instagram three times per week while we’re in season and twice per week when we’re not. Not complete. A big podcast goal for me in 2024!

5) Complete my blog categorization project. Complete! I am finished with this massive project. It took me two years!

6) Host a silent reading night. Complete. I did not host a silent reading night, but I did start attending Silent Book Club.

7) Watch 6 movies and 6 standup specials. (9/12) Not complete. I watched six movies but fell short with just three stand-up specials. (Bri and I were supposed to see Taylor Tomlinson in November but the show got postponed to April since she fell ill.)

MOVIES

  • Glass Onion ★★★☆☆
  • Are You There God, It’s Me Margaret ★★★★★
  • The Little Mermaid ★★★★★
  • Clue ★★★★☆
  • Barbie ★★★★★
  • Red, White, and Royal Blue ★★★★☆

STAND-UPS

  • Jim Gaffigan (live) ★★★★☆
  • Michelle Wolf: Joke Show ★★★★☆
  • John Mulaney: Baby J ★★★★★

FUN STUFF (7/8 complete)

1) Go tubing at Rainbow Springs. Complete! I went in August with my mom and stepdad and had the best time.

2) Take a knife skills class. Complete! It was so much fun!

3) Learn how to French braid. Complete.

4) Visit one new state. Complete. I visited South Carolina in early July and Tennessee in December.

5) Get a tattoo. Complete. I got this done at the end of September – yay!

6) See a Dolphins game in person. Not complete.

7) Complete Project 365. Complete!

8) Go on at least 5 first dates. Complete! I went on three first dates and one of those first dates morphed into a five-month relationship, so I’m counting this as complete.

Alright, so what did we learn from my 2023 goals? I love completing home, hobbies, and fun goals. I do not love completing health and money goals! Or maybe it’s easier for me to complete the more exciting goals and I need a new strategy for completing the goals that require a little more from me. I’ve been thinking about moving from monthly goals to quarterly goals in 2024, and that might be a good place to put these health/money goals so I can break them into something more manageable for me—and I can reassess at the end of each quarter how the goal has worked for me and what may need to be changed.

In any event, in 2023, I completed 16 of 29 goals, or 55%. That’s an F average in school but let’s take the optimist’s lens with this percentage—I completed more than half of the goals I set for myself this year! I never set my yearly goals with the intention that I’ll complete all of them, so I’m happy with what I accomplished this year. Lots of fun goals achieved and I’m excited to set more fun goals in 2024.

How did you do with your 2023 goals, if you set them?

Categories: Best Of

Best of 2023 | The Year in Blogging

This is always a fun post to put together at the end of the year because it’s the only time I ever look at my stats! I don’t really care about blogging stats, but I can pull my yearly stats pretty easily so it’s fun to compare them year after year. I also love looking at what blog posts resonated with you guys the most this year and looking back on all of my blog posts to pull out a few of my favorites. Let’s get to it!

By the Numbers

  • 61,000 unique views
  • 13,100 visitors
  • 884 words per post on average
  • 3,000 comments
  • 154 posts
  • 112 countries represented in my views (with the United States, Canada, and Poland being my top three)
  • 206 subscribers

Lots of great growth this year! My unique views and visitors increased by a bit, but what really increased were my comments and subscribers. This was good to see, as it shows that I’m building a wonderful community and it’s exactly what I want from this blog! I wrote about 30ish fewer posts this year (I took a blogging break in August, which is one of the reasons for that decrease) and my average words per post went down. (Last year, I was at 1,088 words, so look at that! I can be more concise!)

My Top 5 Blog Posts of 2023

(Blog posts written in 2023, in order of most pageviews.)

  1. My Laundry Habits – I am not surprised that this was my most popular post of 2023; we love learning about each other’s daily habits. We all do these normal routine tasks so differently, depending on how many people we live with, how we learned to do laundry, and our own specific ticks when it comes to laundry. It was a fun post to write and even better to get everyone’s comments on their own processes.
  2. Diet Culture, Fat Acceptance & What Comes Next – I wrote this post because I needed the catharsis of talking about these thoughts that had been percolating in my head for so long. I discuss my journey with dieting and diet culture in general, and my reasoning for seeking out a dietician to help me learn how to eat in a healthy, sustainable way. I am so happy that I found a dietician who believes in the concept of Health at Every Size and hates diet culture as much as I do!
  3. A Tale of Two Doctors – I wrote this post after having two completely different experiences with two doctors. I went to my primary care doctor to talk about adjusting my Lexapro dose and instead of having a caring, knowledgeable conversation with someone, I was lectured about my weight. (It should be noted here that the doctor I saw was not my usual PCP; she was out on leave and this was her replacement.) Then, I reached out to a psychiatrist and had such an eye-opening and positive experience.
  4. 10 Little Things That Make My Life Better – I stole this post idea from San and it was so fun to round up 10 inexpensive but incredibly useful things that make my life so much better. We’ve got everything from microfiber hair towels to squeeze bottles on this list!
  5. Monthly Goals | June 2023 – Every year, one of my random monthly posts squeaks into this list. I have no idea why this post was so popular over other posts, but it received nearly 300 views for some reason. Okay then!

My All-Time Most Popular Blog Posts

  1. I’m 27 and Scared to Move Out (+186 views)
  2. On Being a Socially Anxious Introvert (+6 views)
  3. 10 Things I Like About Myself (+1,125 views)
  4. “What is meant for me is already mine.” (+594 views)
  5. Rules for Living with a Dachshund (+101 views)

This list has not budged in many years and that remains true this year. I’m still amazed at how many views “10 Things I Like About Myself” is getting every year (in 2022, it had over 2,000 new views!). I have a feeling that it will overtake my socially anxious introvert post in 2024. These posts all have 5,000+ views, which is just astounding to me.

Other Favorite Posts

  1. What Is a Writing Date? – My friend Mikaela and I have been doing writing dates for a full decade. We meet up weekly at Starbucks and work on our own creative projects. I talk a lot about these writing dates in passing but have never explained exactly what they are, so I sat down to write it all out in this post.
  2. Coming to Terms With Myself at Pride – I attended my first Pride parade this year and it was a truly amazing experience to be surrounded by other queer people and allies. It was such a positive, beautiful atmosphere! I wrote about my experience at the event and the slow process of accepting my place in the queer community.
  3. Body Positive Resources – After I wrote my post on diet culture, someone asked me for a list of body positive resources and I was more than happy to oblige! This post has podcasts to listen to, people to follow on Instagram, and books to read that can help you unlearn diet culture.
  4. My LASIK Experience – I got LASIK this year! (Maybe I talked about it a time or twelve?) I wrote this very detailed post about the whole process with specific headlines so you can skip any of the eyeball stuff.
  5. What’s Working in My Reading Life – I loved putting this post together during NaBloPoMo. It was fun to think deeply about what my reading life looks like right now and what feels good about it. I think this may be a post I return to every few years to see how things have changed.

And that’s my year in blogging! What a great year and I cannot wait for another year of blabbing about my life on this dear space.

Categories: Best Of

Best of 2023 | My Favorite Podcasts

Who’s ready for a podcast round-up? I love my podcasts so much; I have truly developed parasocial relationships with the hosts on many of my favorite shows. Last year, I included my own podcast in my round-up but I decided to take it out of the running this year—if only to leave room for one last podcast to sneak in. If you don’t know, my best friend Bri and I host The Friendship Paradox, which discusses personalities and the ways our very different personalities affect our friendship, our lives, and much more. We’ve done deep dives on personality frameworks as well as season-long explorations of things like our work lives, traveling, relationships, and more. We discuss how our personalities can impact the way we approach all of these things. We’re currently on a hiatus until the new year but give us a listen if you want!

Now, onto my favorite podcasts of 2023! I am listing these in alphabetical order:

5-4

The tagline for this show is: “A podcast about how much the Supreme Court sucks.” And it has truly opened my eyes to how bad Supreme Court justices can be with their decisions. Like, they are not as smart as I thought they were? I just always thought they were these geniuses who only got to that position because they were the best of the best. HA. HAHAHAHA. Anyway, this podcast goes through some of the worst Supreme Court decisions throughout history and the three hosts (all with law backgrounds) go through the reasons why the decision was trash. They are super snarky and I love it!

Episodes every other Tuesday – curse warning on this one (LOTS of f-bombs!)

Currently Reading

I’ve been listening to this bookish podcast for such a long time, and I still love it so much. I rarely stick around for the deep dives; I just want to know what books they are reading and their thoughts about them. I even keep a list on Goodreads of Kaytee/Meredith recs so I can see how my reading taste aligns with theirs. (So far, Kaytee usually doesn’t steer me wrong with her recs, but Meredith can be hit or miss—unless it’s a thriller/mystery, and then she never misses.) It’s a fun, easy podcast to listen to and I love how delightfully bookish the hosts are!

Episodes every Monday

Faith Adjacent

I am so very glad that The Bible Binge changed its name, and it’s a perfect one for this show that talks about faith and religion from a variety of lenses. Sometimes it’s about pop culture, sometimes it’s about Bible stories, and sometimes it’s about a very specific aspect of faith. I love the light-hearted tone they take (while still being respectful) and even though I am no longer a practicing Christian and have no desire to go back to a church environment, I still find so much to love about this podcast. The main reason I love this podcast is that the hosts remind me that Christians can be kind and thoughtful and liberal. Their views may not always align with mine, but the important stuff is there and that’s what matters.

Episodes every Thursday

The Girl Next Door Podcast

Another podcast that has remained in my top-10 year after year. What’s more, this podcast inspired the idea of my own podcast because I just loved the format of the show: just two friends sitting down to chit-chat about their lives, but always with a focused topic. Kelsey and Erica, the hosts of the show, are two very different people, too, and it’s always fun to learn more about their different approaches to life. I tend to identify more with Erica while striving to be a Kelsey.

Episodes every other Wednesday

Good Christian Fun

What more can I say about this podcast that I haven’t already said? It is so firmly in my wheelhouse, as a girl who grew up with Christian pop culture and also went through a faith deconstruction journey. This podcast talks about all different kinds of Christian pop culture—music, movies, and other entertainment made by and made for Christians. Sometimes, they take their humor a bit too far but for the most part, I always find myself laughing along while I listen.

Episodes every Wednesday – curse/crude humor warning on this one

Over Under Achievers

I rarely listen to sports podcasts, even though I love sports, because I’ve yet to find podcast hosts that I like. Until Knox from The Popcast started a podcast with his best friend Jason. Yes, it’s two straight white guys talking about sports, but it works for me. I love how silly this podcast is and how informative, too. The two men often bet on sports games (hence the name Over Underachievers), which is not my thing, but they do it responsibly and it’s really funny when they bet so very wrong and have to own up to losing money. If you like sports, give it a listen!

Episodes every Monday and Friday

The Popcast

This podcast is truly my everything. Whenever I’m feeling sad and need a pick-me-up, I immediately turn on this podcast because I know it’s going to put me in a better mood. It’s a pop culture podcast, but it goes way beyond simply talking about what’s happening in pop culture. Instead, they do things like ranking the best Ryans in pop culture or doing a snake draft of fictional characters who are most definitely canceled. And please don’t miss their Flavor Town episodes where people write in about their spiciest opinions. And no, not like “Taylor Swift is overrated.” But rather, “I don’t think it should be taboo to marry your first cousin.” You know, normal stuff like that. Anyway, if there’s one podcast I want you to give a try (other than my own, of course), it’s this one.

Episodes every Wednesday

Rob Has a Podcast

This is a super niche podcast, but it’s one I can’t live without! RHAP is a podcast that discusses all sorts of reality TV, specifically Survivor, Big Brother, and The Amazing Race. I love their episode recaps and find their analysis to always be super insightful, respectful, and interesting. They have a diverse panel of hosts, so it’s not all white dudes shouting into a microphone, which I appreciate. If you love reality TV and want to get some post-episode analysis, give this a listen! (Oh, and their sister podcast Reality TV RHAP-Ups is great, too. I always turn to them for my Love Is Blind post-episode discussions!)

Episodes daily

Sarah’s Bookshelves Live

My all-time favorite bookish podcast! I really can’t get enough of Sarah, especially once I joined her Patreon community and now get numerous fun episodes every week. Her author interviews are usually great, although I don’t listen to all of them. What I really love is her episodes with book industry professionals, like literary agents and such. And her seasonal book previews are fun, too. I think her Patreon is so worth the extra money because she puts a lot of time and effort into her extra episodes, and they are always excellent.

Episodes every other Wednesday

Stuff You Should Know

I left my dear SYSK boys off my favorites list last year, but I couldn’t leave them off this year. I love this podcast so much! I learn so much from it and Josh and Chuck have become my parasocial uncles. I’m deeply invested in their lives! This is a podcast that you can listen to with your entire family (depending on the topic, of course). Every episode covers a different topic, from shipwrecks to the lives of famous people to abstract concepts like kindness. And hey, they even had an episode about parasocial relationships! How meta of them.

Episodes every Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday

Categories: Best Of

Book Club 2023

This year, our book club stepped things up a notch! We have 6 members in our book club, so every member was given two months of the year to plan. In that month, you would give the group three books to select from, and you would plan the book club activity. We had such a fun time with this! I wanted to give a review of what we did, partly for my memories, and also so you can take these ideas to do something fun in your own lives. (Buckle up—this is a long post!)

January

This was an incredible way to start off our year of book club experiences! We had a wonderful woman come over to Bri’s house for a permanent jewelry experience. Permanent jewelry is expensive (I think my bracelet cost around $150) but considering I’ve worn my bracelet every single day since I got it and it’s held up really well, I think it was worth it. And it’s been so fun to have a tangible reminder of my friendship with these ladies.

It was a little awkward to have a book club discussion while the woman doing the permanent jewelry was working, haha, but we had a pretty good discussion. There was a very interesting civil rights component to that book and I remember us talking at length about how that plotline was written.

February

This was such a fun night and it has stuck with me throughout the year. We all went to Amber’s condo in our pajamas where we enjoyed a nacho bar and then played a really fun game. I remember laughing so much during this game!

The book was a bit of a dud for most of us. What we liked about this book was learning more about the tobacco production process and tobacco marketing in the 1940s, but the writing wasn’t great and the execution of the book fell flat. (During this meeting, I remember talking to my friends about my uncle’s recent lung cancer diagnosis. This memory is heart-wrenching because I had no idea he’d be gone 10 months later.)

March

In March, we all got together at Lynn’s house and brought our own charcuterie board. We had a good mix of breads, dessert, meats, cheeses, and lots more. I brought a yogurt parfait board! We enjoyed a few rounds of food, had lots of chit-chat time, and discussed the book. It was a good time!

This book had some mixed reviews, but I loved it! It was a thriller and I thought it was so well-written and intriguing. We had a pretty good discussion about this, especially about some of the feminist aspects of the book.

April

In April, we had a more low-key book club experience as we all met up at one of our favorite local restaurants for dinner and to celebrate Amber, as it was her birthday! We had a good time.

The book we read was one that most of us enjoyed; it was about a traveling circus during World War II. I’m a bit burned out on WWII novels at this point, but I do enjoy a WWII novel that brings something different to the table and this one definitely did that.

May

This is another evening that I look back with immense fondness. It was such a fun night! Only four of us were able to go—Bri was under the weather and Mikaela had a doggo emergency (everything ended up okay!). We had dinner at a Greek restaurant downtown and then headed to a shuffleboard club to play a few games. Afterward, we found a delicious dessert shop for a late-night treat. The best part about this evening, though, is that our friend Lynn offered to drive us around. The three of us parked in a parking garage and then Lynn handled the driving and downtown parking, which we greatly appreciated as three women who have parking/driving anxiety.

We had a pretty good discussion about the book, too. We talked about the way power can be harmful, no matter who is in charge, and we all raved about the final chapter, which is one of those endings I’m still thinking about. It’s such a great final chapter!

June

June was my month for choosing a book club experience, and I chose axe throwing! We met up for dinner at a bar right next to the axe-throwing place and then had a fun few hours learning how to throw an axe and compete in various games. Some friends were a little skittish about this experience beforehand, but everyone ended up having the best time and it warmed my heart!

After we threw some axes, we found a cute little ice cream shop to have dessert and discuss the book. It was one of my favorites of the year and it felt good to be able to talk about why this gay love story meant so much to me.

July

One of the BEST experiences of the year! We all had such a great time doing a murder mystery party and I think the majority of us were able to correctly guess the murderer (it ended up being Bri’s character—she claims to be a villain, so this further proves her theory). We’ve already decided to do this on a yearly basis and in 2024, we’re going to try to get our act together to get dressed up and make it a big event!

We took a break during the murder mystery for dinner—we ordered in pizza, so something simple and delicious! And we discussed the book while we ate. This one had some mixed reviews: half of us enjoyed it and the other half were “meh” about it. I fell into the “meh” camp. We had an interesting discussion about women and autonomy, what was permissible and what wasn’t, and that helped me better understand why the other ladies enjoyed the book so much.

August

Wait, was this the best experience of the year? We still talk about how fun this escape room was! We had a great time trying to figure out all of the puzzles. This escape room was an all-time favorite for me and there were so many different rooms to go through and unique puzzles to solve. They did a fantastic job putting this room together!

After the escape room, we all went to a nearby Italian restaurant for dinner and to discuss the book. I just loved the book selection this month and enjoyed talking about the impact it had on me. I can’t remember if we got super deep with our discussion, but I don’t really need that with my book club. I just like talking about the book and hearing why people liked it or didn’t like it.

September

We all had a great time at our September experience: making pottery! This was the first time most of us used a pottery wheel and it was mostly terrifying but also so much fun. I felt like I learned a lot and I was happy to have two beautiful pieces by the end of the event. Also, I don’t know how I did this, but I ended up getting clay everywhere: my face, my hair, my clothes, my shoes… nothing was safe!

During the second half of the pottery experience, we were hanging out together painting our clay pieces and this is when we spent some time talking about the book. I found the book to be pretty interesting but I had some quibbles with it that I talked about during our discussion time. Overall, it wasn’t a hit for most of us.

October

We had such a good time at the escape room in August that we returned in October to do the other escape room. This one was said to be much harder than the first, but we were confident in our ability to get it done. And we did, with a few seconds to spare. I did not enjoy this escape room as much as the previous one because it was a bit scarier! It felt more horror-based than thriller-based, which was perfect for an October escape room, but not great for my psyche, ha.

After the escape room, we went to dinner at the same restaurant we went to in August. We had a great discussion about the book, as we all really loved it! It was 4 or 5 stars for the majority of us. I think we all agreed that we want to visit New Zealand after reading this book.

November

I was hoping to host book club in November for a game night, but I had to switch plans because that was the week my apartment’s roof was getting worked on and parking was atrocious. Instead, we went to my favorite local pizza place for dinner and conversation. It was a lovely night!

We also had a really great discussion about the book, and I was happy that everyone loved it. I thought it was such a well-done story and liked this exploration of what it means to be married, have strong female friendships, and discover yourself. We talked about the infidelity plotline and if we’re turned off by these types of tropes, and we were pretty split between those who don’t like them and those who don’t mind them. I don’t mind them myself, but they have to be handled in the right way, of course!

December

Our final book club meeting of the year was such a fun one! We had our annual book club Christmas party at Bri’s house. Bri cooked us breakfast, we put together mini gingerbread houses, and we played a super fun game. And then we had our favorite things gift exchange! Here’s what I gifted: one microfiber hair twist towel (yes, the towel that has been all the range in bloglandia and is truly one of my favorite things!), two face masks that you peel off your face in an incredibly satisfying manner (remember when you used to let glue dry on your finger and then peel it off? Like that.), and two Blow-Pops because I re-discovered Blow-Pops in 2023 and love them.

And here are the favorite things I received:

  • A pair of super cozy slippers
  • A box of green tea with cozy socks “that don’t slip down your ankles!”
  • Dr. Bronner’s peppermint lip balm with a $5 gift card to Dunkin’s
  • A beautiful notebook with a selection of pens
  • A mini bottle of Prosecco with a package of Mighty Patch acne patches

It was such a wonderful gift exchange and it was a really lovely way to see what things had made an impact on my friends this year. For example, the friend who gave us the notebook and pens did so because she started a habit of listing out the things she’s grateful for, and encouraged us to do the same.

There wasn’t any discussion about the book, though, because only two people had read it by the time our meeting came around, ha. (We had a two-week turnaround from November’s book club meeting to December, so that was cutting things a bit tight.)

And that was Book Club 2023! I am so, so grateful to have these women in my life. We lift each other up, cheer each other on, and support each other when things are hard. And, along the way, we read together and have some of the most exciting experiences that will be with us for a long time. Speaking of books, here are the final stats:

  • Genre breakdown: historical fiction (4), contemporary fiction (4), thriller (2), dystopian (1), romance (1)
  • Overall rating: 3.8
  • My format breakdown: audiobooks (7), print books (3), e-books (1)
  • Highest-rated books of the year: The Power by Naomi Alderman (4.25 stars) and When We Believed in Mermaids by Barbara O’Neal (4.25 stars)
  • Lowest-rated book of the year: The Tobacco Wives by Adele Myers (3.25 stars)

If you made it through this super-long post, thank you! This was a lot. Do you belong to a book club?