And it’s May! April was a pretty crazy month – my apartment was fumigated, I got a nasty stomach bug, and it was my first full month on anxiety meds. But throughout all of that, there were a ton of great moments and happiness. I really, really loved April and it was truly a great month for me. Here are the 10 best things about my month:

1. A sleepover at my mom’s. My apartment was fumigated early in the month, so Dutch and I stayed with my mom for a few days. And it was really fun to have a sleepover with her! We made dinner together one night, we watched a lot of TV, and having a helping hand with Dutch was soooo nice. (Mom also got to witness Dutch’s middle-of-the-night restlessness, as he was up from midnight – 2:30AM the first night. Yay.)

2. Breakfast dates with my friend, A., exploring coffee shops around the area. My friend, A., wanted to start exploring all of the different coffee shops around our area and invited me along on her journey. In April, we went to three coffee shops: Banyan Cafe, Mity Nice Cafe, and Bandit Coffee Company. So far, Banyan has my heart for its delicious food and even better coffee. Mity Nice was okay, but Bandit was a little too hipster for my liking. We’ve also had some of our friends join us for the dates. Coffee + good food + girl talk? Perfect!

3. One month on Lexapro. I’ve been on Lexapro, an antidepressant that’s also used for generalized anxiety disorder, for a little over a month now. I’ve been hesitant to seek out meds for my anxiety, not because I think there’s anything wrong with taking meds, but because I thought that maybe my anxiety wasn’t “bad enough” and maybe I was being a drama queen. I also worried that because I wasn’t a nervous wreck every single moment of every single day that it wouldn’t work for me. Well, I finally spoke to a doctor and got a prescription because my anxiety was getting progressively worse and I wanted to see if it would make me feel even a tiny bit better. And yes. YES. This stuff works. I feel more stable and able to handle life. Little things that used to send me into a tailspin no longer do. I don’t feel as if there’s an elephant sitting on my chest anymore. So, three cheers to Lexapro and lessened anxiety symptoms!

4. Teaching my nephew how to play Clue. Clue is one of my favorite board games and at a recent Family Game Night, my nephew pulled this game out and asked to play it. When I said it might be too complicated for him, he looked at me and said sweetly, “But you can teach me.” Well, all right then! So, I’ve been trying to teach him how to play the game and it’s been so much fun. He even won a game and was so thrilled! It was adorable. Of course, it’s a little weird to say, “So, there’s been a murder…” to your eight-year-old nephew, but alas, I don’t think I’ve given him any nightmares.

5. An Easter picnic. My mom organized a picnic at a local park with my family for Easter, and it was a ton of fun! We had nearly 20 people, so it was a great turnout. We used to do picnics at this park all the time and it’s one of my more fond memories. Grandma’s presence was definitely missed – with any family gathering, she is – but we enjoyed eating tons of yummy food and catching up with one another. My mom even had an egg hunt for the littles!

6. A great haircut. My hairstylist of nearly 15 years left to pursue a different career path, and I was really, really bummed about it. She was someone who took my hair from dark brown to blonde in one sitting, cut my hair to donate to Locks of Love, and dealt with all my different hair moods. I was worried about getting a new hairstylist because it felt like nobody could make my hair look as good as Hailey did (seriously – every time I went to a different stylist over the past 15 years, it turned out awful!) Well, I had my first haircut with my new stylist, someone Hailey recommended to me, and she did a fantastic job! It is a huge sigh of relief to know that I have another great hairstylist to go to, someone I can trust with my hair. My hair is such a defining feature of me, and if that makes me sound shallow, so be it. But I’m glad to know I don’t have to worry about terrible haircuts anytime soon.

7. Lovett or Leave It. This is the only podcast I listen to the minute it’s downloaded on my podcast app. It’s a game-show-style podcast that talks about what’s going on in the news in a way that doesn’t make you want to cry or throw things (which is basically what I want to do every time I open up Twitter). Jon Lovett, one of the hosts of Pod Save America, is the host of this podcast (hence the name) and brings on three guests to play games like “OK Stop,” in which they watch a news clip and stop it at various times to talk about what’s being said and the “Rant Wheel,” which has various news-worthy topics (everything from Jared Kushner to S-Town) for Jon to rant about. It’s fantastic and makes me laugh and Jon Lovett is everything to me.

8. My mom taking care of me. It’s true what they say, you’re never too old to need your mom. This month, my mom took care of me in myriad ways: letting me stay with her while my apartment was fumigated, bringing me soup and taking me to urgent care when I got sick, and helping me out by lending me her car while mine was in the shop for a day. The thing about being single is that you don’t have that person to help you out when things get hairy. It means you have to rely on the kindness of other people, and while I have plenty of friends who are willing to help me out, there’s truly nothing like family, and knowing I still have my mom to be there for me, even though I’m 29 and independent, is one of the most comforting feelings in the world.

9. A picnic with my work ladies. I am grateful that I have a handful of coworkers that have become good friends of mine, and one such friend recently went to France and came back with wine for us to share. So, last Friday afternoon, we went down to the little beach near where we work and enjoyed wine from France, as well as an assortment of delicious treats, like fruit, Nutella, cheese, crackers, and cookies. I’m not much of a wino, so I can’t tell you if the wine was any good (ha), but what I loved most was just gathering with my friends and enjoying the sunshine, ocean breeze, and conversation.

10. Sportsfest 2017. Sportsfest was incredibly fun and incredibly challenging. I spent the month leading up to the event trying to talk myself into going because I knew it wasn’t really my “scene” (hot beach, loud music, crowds, doing athletic events, etc.), but I also wanted to kick my social anxiety in the teeth and go do something I wouldn’t normally do. Thankfully, two of my close girlfriends were going to the event, so that helped ease my anxiety a bit. And it ended up being so much fun! I don’t think I was very much help due to my lack of athletic ability (my strategy for dodgeball was just “don’t get hit”), but I was an extra body and a good cheerleader. I was there for six hours, walked over 11,000 steps, and even though I meticulously applied sunscreen, got a bit burnt. At the end of the day, my feet and ankles were trashed from walking barefoot in the hot sand for the entire day. But I did it and I showed my social anxiety who is boss and I had fun and I cannot WAIT for Sportsfest 2018.

What are some highlights of April for you?

It’s hard to believe it, but the first quarter of the year is behind us. Quarter two for me will involve some travel and hopefully fewer vet appointments for Dutch, ha. March was an interesting month because half of it was wonderful and the other half was not. But April feels like a fresh start and I’m feeling better than I have in a while. I can’t wait to see what this month has in store for me, but before that happens, let’s take a look back on the good moments of March:

1) Celebrating Dutch’s 15th birthday. Dutch turned 15 at the beginning of March, and it was an especially happy birthday because the day before, my mom and I took him in for an ultrasound to diagnose what was causing his high liver levels. We could have been given horrid news, like liver failure, but it turned out to be simple “gallbladder sludge” that will hopefully clear up after a round of meds. For Dutch’s birthday, my mom and I took him to Tijuana Flats and then sang happy birthday to him and let him eat part of a vanilla cupcake. Yes, we are those kind of dog parents.

2) Joining the gym. One of the brightest parts of March for me was finally joining the gym. It’s something I have wanted to do for a few months, and I can’t express enough how it is changing my life. I get to do spin again, which is my favorite way to work out, and I’ve even braved the scary weights area of the gym to do some strength training. (I stick to times when the gym is not as busy, usually Friday evenings and Sunday mornings.) I am so, so happy to be a gym goer!

3) Beauty and the Beast. You guys. YOU GUYS. I cannot get over this movie. I cried when it was over because I was so overcome by how perfect it was. Belle has always been my favorite Disney princess, and the songs were such an integral part of my childhood. I loved seeing them performed live-action on the screen. Emma Watson was perfection, and so was Josh Freaking Gad (love him). It lived up to my every expectation. I can’t wait to own it and watch it again and again and again.

4) Booking a flight to Puerto Rico. So, a lot happened in March and one of those things was that I decided I needed to cancel my trip to NYC. It was going to be a really expensive trip and it was making me anxious. But I still had a flight credit due to a flight I had booked but then couldn’t go on. I figured I was just going to have to eat the cost until a coworker mentioned that she was going to Puerto Rico for her honeymoon and how cheap the flights are. And so I looked it up, liked the price, texted my mom, and booked the tickets! I am way more excited to go to Puerto Rico than I ever was to visit NYC (tropical locales > busy cities). I still want to visit NYC, but I’m also really excited to explore Puerto Rico (and spend lots of time sipping fruity drinks on the beach).

5) S-Town. This was an interesting podcast series, though it was definitely way different than what I was expecting. I listened to the whole thing in three days, and I think it was much better in binge form than if they had released the episodes week by week. I really loved Brian Reed and his melodic voice, as well as the perfectly placed music cues. That reminded me a lot of Serial season one. I also could get enough of John B., though at times, he reminded me way too much of my father (eeks). What I liked most about this podcast was that three coworkers listened to it alongside me, so we had a lot of discussions about it. But it definitely wasn’t a Serial replacement and Sarah needs to release season three sooooooon.

6) A new primary care doctor. I finally, finally, finally found a great primary care doctor. I haven’t had one for well over a year. This doctor is young and very personable and I felt so comfortable talking to her, especially about the anxiety I experience. And she sees patients on Friday afternoons, which means no missing work for a doctor’s appointment (unless I’m legit sick, of course). I found her through ZocDoc, which allowed me to look for doctors in my area that accepted my insurance, as well as book the appointment online. I hate calling to book appointments because I get really tongue twisted and just say yes to any appointment they give me (10am on a Tuesday? I’ll be there!), so this was super convenient for me. (And no, I am not sponsored by them. Just telling you about a cool way to book medical appointments!)

7) Celebrating International Women’s Day with my girlfriends. It was so nice to celebrate International Women’s Day with some of my girlfriends! We met up at a restaurant downtown after work and had the best time catching up. The restaurant was super eclectic with a really diverse menu, but I had a hamburger because I’m so not an adventurous eater! It was a really good time and left me feeling so grateful for the people I have in my life.

8) Fiction writing. I’m not freelancing right now, which is giving me a whole lot more time to work on my fiction novel. I didn’t keep track of how many words I wrote in my novel in March, but I think I’m writing close to 5,000 words a week. It’s been so enjoyable and such a fun way to stretch my creative muscles. 2017 is the year I finally finish writing my novel, I know it!

9) A new windshield. So, randomly one Monday morning, I noticed that a small crack had appeared on my windshield. It started at the top of my windshield in the middle and traveled down. It was small, but I knew I’d need to get it fixed ASAP. Well, being the super adult I am, I kept putting off scheduling the glass repair, and every week, I noticed the crack got a tiny bit longer. It was nearing the driver’s side of the windshield, too, and I knew I had to stop putting it off and get it repaired. Well, it was probably the easiest car repair ever! I just filed a claim using my car insurance’s app and was able to schedule the service right from the app. (Living in the future is amazing.) The glass repair tech came Friday afternoon and within an hour, I had a new windshield! The tech also vacuumed my car and cleaned all of my windows (!). All in all, a supremely pleasant experience. (Made even better that glass repair/replacement is covered under my insurance. First time I’ve ever needed to use my insurance!)

10) My tribe. It’s easy for me to forget that I have a tribe. I didn’t always have a support system to lean on; I spent a lot of my early twenties pretty solitary. But March was a rough month for me and I wrote a vulnerable Instagram post about my struggles, the kind of post where I woke up the next day and desperately wanted to delete it. But in doing so, friends reached out to me and said, “Hey, I’m here.” I didn’t write that post so that my friends would do that. I wrote that post to share my struggle and to let other people who are struggling know it is okay and they will get through this. But the post helped me realize I need to be better about reaching out and that I have a solid support system to get me through the rough times.

What was a good thing that happened in March for you?

Happy last day of February! I can’t believe how fast this month zipped by. I felt very overwhelmed for much of the month, and I’m waiting for a time when my life will slow down and get boring again, but I’m not sure if that’s going to happen! (What happened to my plan-free weekends? Whimper.) In any event, I’m here to talk about the good things that happened in February, right? Here’s what I loved this month:

1) Pops’ successful back surgery. Early in February, Pops had surgery to take care of a bulging disc in his back. He’s been in chronic pain with it for years and he finally decided to do the surgery, even though he’s nearly 76 and there were a lot of warnings about undergoing such a major surgery at his age. But I think it just shows how much more life Pops wants to live; he doesn’t see himself slowing down anytime soon. And, thankfully, the surgery went great and he should be pain-free from here on out!

2) Helping Pops. Before Pops had his back surgery, the surgeon told us he should only need to be in the hospital for two days to recover. Well, that turned out to be a gross underestimate. He wound up staying in the hospital for more than two weeks, eleven of those days in a rehab facility. He was in a ton of pain following his surgery, and it was hard to see my usually strong and fearless Pops in such pain. He was also having trouble walking, due to the pain, but once he got to the rehab facility, things started progressing much faster since he was able to do more physical therapy. (He looked forward to his PT sessions and gladly completed any exercises they asked of him. He’s a badass, my Pops.) I tried to spend as much time as I could with Pops, knowing that he would need his family supporting him more than ever before. He was the one who took care of Grandma during all of her cancer battles – from shuffling her to chemo appointments to cleaning around the house – and I was grateful I was able to give back to him in this small way. At the end of the day, I just wanted him to know that even though Grandma is gone, he’s not alone and we’ll be there for him whenever he needs us.

3) Buying myself fresh flowers. After a brief hiatus from buying fresh flowers, I started doing so again this month just to give my home a little sprucing up. One week, I got myself some orange tulips, and another week, I went for sunflowers. There’s just something so nice about having a vase full of flowers to greet me every time I walk through the door.

4) Getting my taxes done. Taxes are filed and my return was accepted by the IRS! Woohoo! I’m also getting a nice, ole refund, which will be solely used to pay off my credit card. (Christmas + my birthday cruise + vet bills = a hit to my credit card.) I used H&R Block to file my taxes because I wasn’t sure how to appropriately declare freelance earnings (I didn’t make a crazy amount of money freelancing last year, but it was enough that I needed to report it.) I am used to using the free TurboTax system to file my taxes, so paying $275 for H&R Block was… unpleasant… but better to shell out some money and make sure they are done right, you know? Plus, the service I received from H&R Block was outstanding. They were so friendly and accommodating and didn’t make me feel like a total dunce. And look at what my tax specialist wrote on my packet! How sweet!

5) Pod Save America. This podcast is saving my life right now. If you haven’t heard of it, it’s four former Obama staffers who talk about what’s going on in politics and how to stay sane when the world has gone to shit. I have developed a ridiculous crush on Jon Lovett and find their ad spots to be hilarious (“Let’s say you sold your soul to the devil and are having trouble looking yourself in the mirror…”). Give it a listen if you’re having trouble finding hope in Trump’s America.

6) Amazon Prime. I signed up for Amazon Prime back in December, but only really used it to order Christmas presents and get that fab, two-day delivery. I didn’t use it again until this month and realized how joyous it is to run out of something I use often, order it through Amazon from the comfort of my home, and have it delivered to me within two days. No more rushing out to Target! It’s well worth the $11 a month. (Plus, free Kindle books! I downloaded 1984 for free last week!)

7) Mini golfing with book club. This year, my book club (which, really, I should just call it “my friends” because we are truly so much more than your average women’s book club) decided to think outside the box when it comes to our meetings and try new things. In February, we met for breakfast at a cute coffee shop down by the beach and then played a game of mini golf. I love mini golfing. It is one of my favorite activities and I don’t do it nearly enough. I ended up tying with my friend L., and came in second place. Woohoo! It was such a fun afternoon with some of my favorite ladies.

8) Dominic’s 2nd birthday party. My little nephew Dominic turned 2 years old this month and we celebrated with a get-together at a local park. The theme was Mickey Mouse, since he’s obsessed with him, and one of my SIL’s friends made this adorable “photobooth” to take pictures with. The bright spot of the party was that Pops was able to come and spend time with the family. It was so nice to see him up and about!

9) Resistance meetings. I’m part of a group of women who are active in the resistance efforts and we had our first meeting since the inauguration early in February. It was a large group of 12 women and as we went around the room introducing ourselves and saying the issue we are most concerned with, it was frightening that we each had a different, huge issue that was scaring us (for me, it was the potential of censorship of the media). We talked about how we can get involved and started writing postcards to our congresspeople. My friend, A., drove me home after the meeting and we spent the 25-minute drive venting about politics, so it was a healing night on all accounts.

10) Lady dates. My former roommate, B., and I have maintained our weekly “lady date night” ritual since our moves back in September. It was definitely a lot easier to coordinate our date nights when we lived together, but we still make it work! This month, we had dinner at one of our favorite South Tampa restaurants, Bella’s Italian Cafe; went for pedicures and then had pizookies at BJ’s Brewhouse; and enjoyed happy hour drinks and disgustingly good burgers at Doc B’s.

Goals for February

I set a few goals in February, my biggest one being not eating pizza for the entire month. While I did end up eating pizza once, it was a celebratory dinner where my mom picked up a pizza for Pops once he was out of the rehab facility. (Pops was not a fan of the food in there, haha!) I ate a few slices with him and don’t consider my pizza fast a fail. Life happens, you know? It’s the only time I ate it and mostly, I felt really good about not eating pizza and don’t even crave it. I’m sure I’ll eat pizza again, but I’m also feeling good about being very selective about when I do eat it. For my other goals, I finally finished updating my “Work With Me” page and added a “Portfolio” page to my blog. I didn’t adhere to my 9:30 bedtime, work out three times a week, or write 10,000 words in my novel. What can I say? Life was crazier than normal in February!

Here’s what I hope to accomplish in March:

• Join a gym. It’s time to finally bite the bullet and join a gym. I am more than ready for this.
• Go to bed at 9:30pm. Seriously, Steph. Do it! You will feel so much better!
• No more Starbucks breakfast. The unhealthy eating habit I’m trying to kick in March will be Starbucks breakfast. (I’m cutting out one unhealthy eating habit per month and seeing how it makes me feel. January was fast food, February was pizza.) Typically, I like to get a Frappuccino and a sausage, egg, and cheese breakfast sandwich, and I get this combo 1-2 times a week. (It’s basically an entire day’s worth of calories in one sitting.) I can’t completely cut out Starbucks, since it’s where my writing partner and I meet for our writing dates, but I’m going to make sure I eat breakfast at home beforehand and order a simple iced coffee when I’m there.

What were some of the highlights of February for you?