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Stephany Writes

Categories: Recurring Series

Five for Friday (v. 98)

1) It has been a week filled with good things:

  • My mom and I went to a local restaurant because they advertised an Office trivia night, but sadly, they had changed the event to Game of Thrones. Neither of us has watched the show, so we left and found a GREAT local ice cream shop and each enjoyed a delicious cone.
  • I made pottery! Our book club experience this month was a pottery class where we learned how to shape clay into objects. I made a bowl and a vase and received a LOT of help from the instructor to make them into anything resembling those objects. After we made our two pieces, we got to paint them. I can’t wait to bring them home once they’ve been glazed!
  • I finally got my third tattoo! I am not revealing it just yet (I want it to heal first), but suffice it to say, it was extremely painful but I got through it. The whole piece took about an hour and a half to complete, and I’m proud of myself for handling that pain for so long.
  • I got a raise at work! This was entirely unexpected and it made me feel really grateful that my leadership team sees the value in the work I do and wants to keep me around. That feels good!

2) And now for the bummer news of the week: my LASIK procedure had to be pushed back by a few weeks. Womp, womp! I was really looking forward to getting it done next Friday, but now I have to wait until Friday, October 20th. The surgeon had a medical emergency and I really hope everything is okay!

3) I have to take a moment to talk about Sunday’s performance by my beloved Miami Dolphins. They scored SEVENTY points! It was a franchise record and we came close to breaking the all-time record (72 points). Our QB was pulled early in the 4th quarter, and still, we managed to score even more TDs. It must have been quite a devastating loss for any Broncos fan. Nobody wants to get beat like that! But man, I am proud of my team. I feel like this is going to be a special year for us, but I don’t want to get too ahead of myself. The Dolphins are known for disappointing me, so I’ll just try to temper my expectations.

4) I’m currently reading three different books and I’m really liking all of them, which is great because my last two books were very disappointing. On audio, I’m listening to Queen of Thieves by Beezy Marsh. I got this from Book of the Month, but I wasn’t loving the print version so I switched to audio. Some books are just better listened to, I think! This is one of those books, and I’m enjoying it a lot more in this format. In print, I’m reading America’s First Daughter by Stephanie Dray and Laura Kamoie, which is a fictional retelling of Thomas Jefferson’s eldest daughter Patsy’s life. It’s excellent. I’m really enjoying it! And on e-book, I’m reading Cold-Hearted Rake by Lisa Kleypas, a Regency romance novel that has just been a fun book to sink into at night.

5) My weekend plans are few and far between, but I’m glad about that. It will allow me to get some chores done around the apartment and catch up on life. I have a writing date with Mikaela on Saturday morning, of course, and then football with the fam all day Sunday, but the rest of my weekend will be all to myself!

What was a highlight of your week?

Categories: Recurring Series

Demerits & Gold Stars

Happy Wednesday, friends. Let’s talk about some of my recent demerits (areas of my life that aren’t going so well right now) and gold stars (personal wins). I got this idea from Elisabeth who got it from Gretchen Rubin. It’s time to get brutally honest here.

DEMERIT | Spending too much money on Cooking Fever tokens.

I’m embarrassed about this demerit because I am in my flipping mid-30s, what am I doing spending money on in-app purchases?! Alas, the Cooking Fever gods have gotten me. This game is essentially impossible to play without spending money; that’s how it’s designed. The premise of the game is that you own a restaurant and are responsible for cooking all of the food for customers in a timely manner. As the game progresses, you cycle through all different types of restaurants (Italian restaurants, coffee shops, sushi restaurants, fine dining restaurants, etc.) but in order to pass each level, you need to spend tokens and gems on different items. For example, buying a pan that cooks your food faster so your customers don’t get angry at you and leave without buying anything. You can also engage in playing and betting on games like slot online, with the opportunity to win substantial prizes.

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IT’S RIDICULOUS, I KNOW. But I am so sucked into this game. It brings me great joy to play it, which is part of the reason I’ve been okay with spending money on the game. We should spend money on the things that bring us joy and happiness, right?! Well, to a degree. I am spending too much money on this game and I need to establish some boundaries, like setting a limit for how many tokens/gems I’m willing to spend in a day. So if you want a game that can help you earn instead, then sites like bro138 is definitely for you.

GOLD STAR | Writing down my schedule on a daily basis.

One of the things I know about myself is that I need a strict schedule. When I just let myself go with the flow, that’s when I end up spending 30 minutes playing games on my phone while lounging on the couch instead of getting dinner started. So I have started sitting down every night to create a schedule for the next day. I write down what meetings I have that day and any big to-dos I need to get done, and then I create an hour-by-hour list of my day. This has been working SO WELL for me! And since every day is different (some days I have zero meetings, some days I need to run errands at lunch, etc), it allows me to create a schedule that works for each day and keeps things interesting. I feel like I am so much more productive and just feel so much better about what I’m getting done each day. Making a strict schedule like this has felt more freeing because I don’t have to battle with myself about what I’m going to do: I know exactly what I need to do, and I do it.

DEMERIT | Not following a budget.

This is a near-constant demerit for me, especially now that I’m not providing monthly or quarterly budget updates. I used to be so good at checking my bank account and itemizing all of my purchases on a regular basis, but I got very tired of this system so I stopped doing it. Instead, I created a loose budget for myself but haven’t been very good about following it closely. Checking my bank account and updating my numbers hasn’t become a part of my routine, and I need to figure out what to do about that. (And before anyone suggests Mint or You Need a Budget – those systems just don’t work for me. I’m glad they work for many people, but my brain just can’t compute.)

GOLD STAR | Eating 3 or more servings of fruits/vegetables on a near-daily basis.

One of the biggest changes my dietician wanted me to make to my diet was eating more fruits and vegetables. Before I started seeing her, I would go DAYS without eating any fruit or veggies. Well, I’m pleased as punch to say that I’ve been eating three or more servings on a near-daily basis! (I struggle with eating healthy on the weekends. I’m a work in progress?) Typically, I have a piece of fruit with either my morning or afternoon snack, as well as a serving of fruit and a serving of veggies with lunch. So far, I’m digging grapes, pears, green apples, and clementines for fruit. And I love doing a raw veggie like carrots or broccoli with a dip (the Boar’s Head Tzatziki Greek Yogurt dip is amazing). I’ll also usually have some sort of veggie (like green beans or roasted broccoli) with dinner, too, but that doesn’t happen every night. I’m proud of my progress so far, though!

DEMERIT | Being on my phone too much when I’m watching TV.

Ughhh, a constant demerit for me! I spend way too much time on my phone when I’m watching TV. It doesn’t make me feel good. I always feel the need to be doing something else while I’m watching TV – why is that? It’s not as if I’m doing anything productive to “make up” for the time I’m spending watching TV. I’m just on my phone, either scrolling through Instagram or playing a stupid game. For a while, I was using the Downtime feature to turn off my ability to access all of my apps (except for a select few) at night. I probably should turn that back on. I also used to color while watching TV; if I had to multitask, at least make it something that didn’t involve a screen! Maybe I just need to put my phone on the charger in my room in the evenings so I’m not tempted to use it. There are a lot of options here—I just need to get strict with myself! Sometimes a little tough love is needed.

GOLD STAR | Saving money by making it a game.

I have many skills, but saving money is not one of them. While I have a few automatic deposits set up for certain savings accounts (like my car insurance fund, my Christmas fund, etc.), I have always struggled with saving for long-term purchases or socking extra money away in my emergency savings. So I decided to make it fun! I downloaded this worksheet and every Friday, I pull up a random number generator, set it to give me a number between 1 and 52 (the number of tiles on the worksheet), and then whatever number it gives me, I count down to that corresponding tile. Whatever number is in the middle of the selected tile is the number I have to put away into savings. (So, for example, if the random number generator gave me “14,” I would count to the 14th tile, which has the number $40 in it. So I would put $40 into my savings that week.) After sending the money to savings, I color in the tile to show my progress! I’m using this system to add extra money to my emergency fund and to save up for a big purchase (right now, it’s my ladder bookshelf!). In one month, I’ve saved $153 in my emergency savings and $118 in my bookshelf fund—the savings aren’t extraordinary, but they truly do add up and allow me to make progress on my financial goals without feeling like I’m depriving myself.

Any demerits and/or gold stars you want to talk about?

Categories: Recurring Series

Looking Forward – the Fall 2023 Edition

Looking Forward was a series I used to do on my blog but I haven’t done it since 2018. What?! Let’s talk about some of the things I’m looking forward to this week, next month, and in the coming months.

This week, I’m looking forward to a clay-throwing book club experience and getting my third tattoo.

It’s going to be a big week for me! On Wednesday, my book club is getting together for our September meeting and Bri booked us a night at a nearby pottery studio to do clay throwing! This is something I’ve always wanted to do, but I feel so intimidated by the process. Thankfully, this is a private event for just the six of us so we’ll get lots of one-on-one time. I’m excited! Check out the event venues in Flagstaff for your future events.

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And then on Thursday, it’s time to finally get that third tattoo that I’ve been talking about for two years. This tattoo is in honor of my grandma and I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about what I want and where I want it. I’ve finally settled on the design and placement, and I can’t wait to unveil it all soon!

Next month, I’m looking forward to getting LASIK.

This is happening next Friday! It feels so soon, but also so far away. Every time I tell someone I’m getting the procedure, they tell me how much my life is about to change in the best way possible. And I keep thinking about how nice it will be to be able to see from MY OWN EYEBALLS without having corrective lenses. I’ll be able to see my face when I’m doing my makeup! I won’t have to switch between my prescription sunglasses and regular glasses when I’m out and about! I won’t see little starbursts around lights when I’m driving at night! I am so ready for this.

This year, I’m looking forward to the holidays and a family vacation in the mountains.

The holiday season is always my favorite time of year, and it’s going to be more special this year as my mom, my stepdad, the dogs, and I will be spending the week after Christmas in a Tennessee cabin near the Smoky Mountains. We planned this trip early in the year and it’s finally time for me to put my planning hat on and put together our itinerary. I am looking into moderate hikes we can do (both with the dogs and without) as well as some nearby attractions. We have Ober Gatlinburg on our list where we’ll be able to do some snow tubing and other fun winter-y things. I really hope we get some snow while we’re there (my cousin goes every year to this area during the last week of the year, and it’s never snowed for her, so I’m not holding my breath). I haven’t seen snow since I was TWELVE, if you can believe it, so I’m desperate.

Next year, I’m looking forward to visiting California with my mom in the spring.

On a whim, my mom booked us a 4-day cruise that leaves from Los Angeles. So, naturally, I thought: Let’s make this an extended vacation! Neither of us has ever been to California so it’s going to be a fun time for the two of us. I’m already looking at studio tours to do and other touristy things, and I can’t wait to sit down and actually plan this vacation for us!

What is something you’re looking forward to?

Categories: Recurring Series

A Picture Per Hour: Saturday, September 16th

Ready to come along on a typical Saturday in my life? That’s right, friends! It’s “A Picture Per Hour” day!

7:20 a.m.: We’re up for the day! I feed the girls their breakfast (today is “ocean fish and salmon” and if you think I don’t announce the flavor of the day to the cats, you don’t know me). I’m on Day 3 of training them to eat on a schedule and the first two days were rough. They barely ate because they hadn’t realized the food wouldn’t be available all day. Today, it seems like they’re catching on and ate about 75% of their breakfast, which is a vast improvement.

8:26 a.m.: Time for my morning med routine! The yellow gummies are my multivitamin, the purple gummies are my probiotic, the black-and-yellow pill is an antibiotic I’m taking for a UTI, the small white pills are a vitamin D supplement and Lexapro (I’m on 30 mg of Lexapro so I take 1.5 pills every day), and then the big oblong white pills are magnesium glycinate. I’m taking the probiotic and magnesium glycinate based on a recommendation from my psychiatrist. And I am always deficient in vitamin D so I take one pill per day (should maybe take more, but that’s where we’re at for right now).

9:43 a.m.: I spent the majority of this week’s writing date working on a post for our podcast Instagram. I wanted to do a fun infographic revealing Bri and my scores for the Big 5 personality framework, which was the focus of our episode this week. (This score, in particular, tickles me as Bri scored 100% as an extrovert and I scored 6%!) Thankfully, Canva has some very cool graph options that I was able to plug and play, so this came out even better than I imagined.

10:55 a.m.: At the end of each writing date, Mikaela reads the latest chapter she’s written to me. So at this time, I’m sitting in my seat, laptop closed, focusing on her voice and her words. I’m continuously amazed and impressed by her writing skills and her ability to dig deep and think about this dark time in her life. It’s a great chapter!

11:29 a.m.: I’m back home and I get settled on the couch to read a chapter of Think Again by Adam Grant. A friend raved about this book and I’m reading it slowly one chapter per day. It’s… okay? I don’t think I’m learning anything terribly new, honestly.

12:17 p.m.: I’m all cozy in my bed with Eloise loafing nearby. It’s time for my Saturday afternoon nap! Yesss.

3:07 p.m.: I wake up from my nap to find Eloise has parked herself right on my stomach. I spend a lot of time petting her and giving her head scritches as I try to wake up.

4:30 p.m.: I’m not one to sit down and read for long periods of time, but I wanted to get to page 100 on my latest book (Last Girl Ghosted by Lisa Unger) and I did! It’s a very propulsive thriller so far, so it was easy to keep turning the pages.

5:50 p.m.: I took some time to get myself together since I’m having dinner with my mom and stepdad tonight. I tried this new hairstyle (that you can’t see very well from the picture) where I sectioned off the front part of my hair and tied the rest of it back in a ponytail. Then I braided the left and right side, tied off the braids with clear elastics, and tucked the ends into my ponytail. It was fun and different!

6:30 p.m.: I’m at my mom’s! The dogs let me know how much they missed me and how excited they were to see me. I snapped this picture as they stared at my mom when she came into the living room. Equal parts adoration and “why are you leaving us????”

7:00 p.m.: Early this week, I told my mom I needed us to plan dinner at Outback because I was craving one of their baked potatoes (I think they make the best baked potatoes ever). So we made it happen tonight! We always sit at the bar and get great service. My meal hit the spot!

8:45 p.m.: I’m back home and sinking into a nice, warm bubble bath to wrap up the day.

9:10 p.m.: It’s time for my weekly polish change! This week, I’m going to be rocking this sparkly dark pink shade that just makes me so, so happy when I wear it. (Nail polish tips welcome. I can never make my polish last longer than a few days without chipping, and it drives me crazy!)

10:40 p.m.: A Lila sighting! She’s been snoozing in one of the cat beds, so I take her picture as I start turning off the lights around the apartment.

11:17 p.m.: All snuggled in bed, reading with a cat curled up next to me. Bliss!

What would have been your first picture of the day for Saturday?

Categories: Recurring Series

Five for Friday (v. 97)

1) I’ve been in a very low place this week. I woke up on Monday morning and just felt exhausted about the thought of going through my day. I was both sad and irritable. Sometimes, life just feels very hard, you know? There is so much we have to do on a daily basis: work out, go for our mental health walks, put in an eight-hour workday, make food for ourselves, maintain our relationships with texts and calls and Instagram messages and in-person meetups, keep our homes clean, take care of our pets. And if you have kids? Add in school drop-offs and pick-ups, extracurriculars, managing the emotions of small humans, and a whole lot of other things I’m missing. Usually, all of the stuff that comes with living doesn’t bother me much. But every now and then, it makes me want to crawl under the covers and hibernate for at least a week. Things started feeling easier as the week has gone on, and I have a therapy appointment this afternoon which will help me sort out all these feelings, but it wasn’t a fun way to start the week.

2) I received such great advice about what to do about my feeding situation with the cats. Thank you! It was really helpful to read through your own routines and figure out what might work with my girls. What I’ve decided to do is train them to eat on a schedule. I was nervous to do that because the whole point is to get Eloise to eat more and if she doesn’t have free access to food 24/7, doesn’t that defeat the purpose? But maybe it will actually have the opposite effect: She’ll eat more since she needs the structure! We’ll see. The plan is to give them a can of wet food in the morning and take it away after an hour, and then give them 1/2 cup (portioned into two bowls) of dry food in the evening.

Someone pointed out that I may be overfeeding them, but I checked with the calorie counts and it’s right in line of what they should be eating (1/2 can of wet food is 90 calories, 1/4 cup of dry food is 107 calories). They also get treats throughout the day, which I need to be better about limiting. They’re just so cute with their big green eyes and sweet meows! They probably have about 30 calories per day of treats (15% of their diet) and I want to get that down to 15-20.

So that’s the news on the cats! For now.

3) How is this for exciting news? I scheduled my LASIK surgery! I will be getting my eyeballs lasered on Friday, October 6th and I couldn’t be more thrilled about it! I will have to finance the majority of the surgery, so I opened up a Care Credit account for it. It was really scary to do that and know that I am taking on additional debt to afford this procedure, but I also plan on paying it off in full in 18 months (or less) and won’t incur any interest during that time. It makes sense to me to get it done now rather than waiting, as I’m already in my mid-thirties and want to be able to enjoy many years of glasses-free living! I will for sure tell you all about the details of the procedure and my recovery.

4) I am still struggling with my nighttime routine and getting to bed at a reasonable time. I was talking about this with Kim, and she brought up the concept of “revenge bedtime procrastination,” which I had heard about before but the more I looked into it, the more I realized this was exactly what I’ve been doing. (And, of course, the Instagram algorithm served up this Reel about the phenomenon.) I don’t really have time throughout the day to enjoy my leisure pursuits because work takes priority, and then when I’m done for the day, I need to be away from any laptops/computers, so I scroll through my phone or watch TV while eating dinner. And then, suddenly, around 8pm, I get the urge to sit down at my laptop, read blogs, respond to emails, write blog posts, etc. And 8pm is when I should be starting my nighttime routine. Argh! I think the solution is to put myself on a strict schedule and try to build in some break times throughout the day when I can get away from my desk and do something fun like read/comment on blogs for 30 minutes.

5) I’m saving the best tidbit for last: Today is my brother’s birthday! He turns 37. My brother and I have always been very close, but that closeness came with a lot of fighting when we were kids. We still tend to get into one nasty fight every few years (our last one was two years ago and we didn’t talk to each other for weeks!), but we always make up. Family can be really complicated for so many people, and it’s complicated for me at times, but one thing I know for sure is that my brother has my back and I can count on him for anything.

Today would also have been my grandparents’ 64th wedding anniversary, which I trust they are celebrating together in heaven. (And yes, my mom gave her parents a really nice anniversary present in 1986! Hard for any of her brothers to live up to that one.)

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Welcome!

Welcome!

Hi, I'm Stephany! (She/her) I'm a 30-something single lady, living in Florida. I am a bookworm, cat mom, podcaster, and reality TV junkie. I identify as an Enneagram 9, an introvert, and a Highly Sensitive Person. On this blog, you will find stories about my life, book reviews, travel experiences, and more. Welcome!

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