Stephany Writes

Categories: Recurring Series

Monthly Recap | January 2023

Hi, friends! Happy first day of February! With a new year comes a new monthly recap series, and I’m really excited about this one. This post is broken down into 5 sections: good stuff, hard stuff, stuff I recommend, bookish stuff, and goal stuff (wherein I’ll update you guys on how I’m pacing on some of my yearly goals). Sound fun? I hope so!

Good Stuff

  • Attending the Silent Book Club in Tampa – This is a new book club that is exactly up my alley! We met at a coffee shop in Tampa, chit-chatted with each other for a bit, and then spent a full hour in silence, reading our books. It was so nice! Afterward, we did a book exchange. I had a lot of fun and already have the February meeting on my calendar.
  • Finding a psychiatrist – My anxiety has been unmanageable for many, many months and I finally decided to do something about it. I’m now seeing a psychiatrist, someone who is warm and compassionate and committed to helping me feel better, and I have hope that I will finally get my anxiety under control.
  • A really excellent annual review – I had my annual review this month, and my director spent most of it bragging about me, which felt really satisfying. She also gave me a score of “significantly achieves expectations,” which was only handed out to a small number of employees in our organization. I know I had a really good year, career-wise, and this really validates that.
  • Winning my work’s fantasy football draft – This was such a fun surprise! I started off the season on the struggle bus, but my team got it together at the end to pull off a nice win!
  • Lots of time spent with family – One of my favorite things about January is all the time I get to spend with my family to watch all of the playoff games. For a few weeks, we spend nearly all of Saturday and Sunday together, which is really fun and makes my heart very full.

Hard Stuff

  • A doctor’s appointment from hell – I’ve already documented this doctor’s appointment. I was hoping to get a follow-up survey from the office after my appointment, but I never did, which means I’m going to need to call their office to lodge my complaint. It must be done, though.
  • So much anxiety – I was hoping that the new year would mean my anxiety episodes would magically disappear, but surprise! That has not happened. It’s been another tough month of having that low hum of anxiety rippling through my body on a daily basis, and it really fucking sucks.
  • The Dolphins losing their playoff game – Ugh. Will I ever see the Dolphins win a playoff game in my lifetime? I am proud of how they played, though, especially since we had to use our third-string rookie against a very good Bills team. Next year!

Stuff I Recommend

  • The Traitors (Peacock) – My mom recommended this show to me and told me I needed to watch it so we could discuss it. I am obsessed. It brings together reality TV stars (from Survivor, Big Brother, The Bachelor, Below Deck, etc) and regular people and they live together in a big castle in Scotland. Three of these players have been chosen to be traitors, but only the traitors know who each other is. Every night, the traitors meet to “murder” someone in the group, and the other people in the group (known as the “Faithfuls”) have to try to find out who the traitors are. It’s fascinating and fun, and I can’t get enough of it.
  • Comfy lounge pants – I bought these pants in December because I just couldn’t pass up the pattern and how cozy they felt. I wear them paired with a nice top on weekdays, so I look presentable for video calls while still being ridiculously comfortable at home.
  • Kindle pouch – For the longest time, I’ve kept my Kindle Paperwhite in a case and on a whim, I decided I wanted to go case-less and just use a pouch for the times when I need to throw it in my purse. I love this pouch! It’s slim and very protective and looks pretty, too.
  • A 2023 desk calendar – I bought this beautiful handmade desk calendar from Etsy. I like being able to see the whole month at a quick glance.
  • BBQ cheddar mini meatloaves from Iowa Girl Eats – I don’t know if I’ve ever shared this recipe with you guys, but it is my go-to meatloaf recipe. It is SO GOOD and makes excellent leftovers.

Bookish Stuff

Goal Stuff

  • Go for a walk every day (19/30) – Progress, not perfection, right? In February, my goal is to do just a little bit better!
  • Drink a bottle of water every day (13/31) – Oof. This one is not pretty, but it’s a starting point! I do better about drinking water on weekdays, less so on weekends.
  • Complete 100 Peloton workouts (9/100) – I am right on track with this goal. If I can keep doing 9 Peloton workouts every month, I’ll meet this goal no problem.
  • Watch 6 movies and 6 standup specials – This month, I watched Glass Onion. I was really excited to watch this movie because I loved Knives Out and I liked it okay. It didn’t fully meet my expectations and I thought the ending was rather unsatisfying, but there were some fun twists and turns I wasn’t expecting. 3.5/5, I would say.
  • Establish a better morning/nighttime routine – I’m still working on the nighttime routine, but I do feel like I’m doing a lot better with my morning routine. I have a list of tasks I need to accomplish every morning before I start working and most days, I accomplish them!

What’s a recommendation you have?

Categories: Recurring Series

TGIF (v. 48)

The high of my week was having a fun afternoon with my mom on Sunday. We went out for lunch and then popped into Homegoods and Target for a little bit of shopping. It was a really nice time!

The low of my week was having anxiety episodes. I started my new regimen of 30mg of Lexapro over the weekend, but of course, it’s going to take some time for my body to adjust. My mind, meanwhile, wants things to be okay right now, and since I’m not, my anxiety has been thrown into hyperdrive. I’ve also started taking melatonin again at night because I’ve been having a lot of trouble sleeping and tossing and turning when I do fall asleep. This has helped a lot! I’m trying to be patient with myself and knowing I have a psychiatrist who is dedicated to helping me feel better has helped a lot while I struggle through anxious days and nights.

One nagging task I marked off my to-do list this week was hanging my wall clock! I received this beautiful wall clock for Christmas and it has been sitting in its packaging since then, eeks. It was one of those tasks that I thought was going to be really complicated and the clock was going to be really hard to hang, but it took me less than 10 minutes! And now I have a beautiful clock in my apartment. (Unfortunately, I just realized it’s about 4 minutes slow, which is going to aggravate me, so my new nagging task is to take the clock off the wall to fix the time.)

I’m currently reading only one book right now, which is The Fine Print by Lauren Asher. It’s a contemporary romance that Meredith of Currently Reading raved about, and since she is very picky about her romances, I knew I had to pick it up. I’m not very far into the novel, so I can’t give an opinion just yet. In other reading news, I was struggling through The Idea of You by Robinne Lee. This book has gotten phenomenal reviews from so many friends, but I was so stressed out about the romance! (It’s about a 39-year-old woman who starts dating a 20-year-old member of a boy band.) I was reading maybe 20 pages a day of the book but was never excited to pick it up, so I finally decided to abandon it yesterday. I feel very relieved, which is a good sign!

A podcast episode I enjoyed was Sasheer Was Scared to Leave Nicole Stranded in the Middle of the Ocean on Best Friends with Nicole Byer and Sasheer Zamata. In this episode, Nicole and Sasheer recap their trip to the Bahamas and I need them to write a script based on their vacation because this is the movie we need in the world. It started with an Airbnb house from hell and ended with Nicole’s jet ski running out of gas while they were in the middle of the ocean. And that’s only part of their insane adventure! They still have 3.5 days to recap for us! Please do yourself a favor and listen to this crazy story (and then listen to part 2 when it drops next week). It’s hilarious and awful and amazing!

The best money I spent this week was $6 on three salad plates. I like using smaller plates for snacks and the like, but for way too long, I have only had ONE salad plate. One! I don’t know if I only bought one to begin with, or if I bought two and misplaced the other one. But it was a real annoyance because if I used the plate earlier in the day, I would have to wash it to use it later on. I finally decided to just buy more plates. They are these cheap, white salad plates from Target, nothing fancy, and I was just so delighted by myself when I bought them.

My plans this weekend include nothing much! My Friday night and Saturday are free (I may wind up doing a karaoke room with some friends, but I’m still debating if I want to do that, ha). Sunday, I have a writing date with Mikaela in the morning and playoff football in the late afternoon. So sad that there are only 3 football games left this season! Wah.

What are your weekend plans?

Categories: Recurring Series

TGIF (v. 47)

The high of my week was having a four-day weekend! I scheduled Friday off to give myself a long(er) weekend, which was much-needed because I spent last week in tons of meetings and I was worn out by the end of it. I didn’t do much this weekend; it was just nice to be able to relax, sleep in, and get some stuff done.

The low of my week was completely flubbing dinner one day this week. I tried to make this BBQ chicken recipe from Budget Bytes, but the chicken I used was way too large and took forever to cook through. I was cooking the chicken on medium-high heat and I finally bumped up the heat to high, which caused my entire kitchen to get smoky. I had to turn on the vents and open my patio door to air things out. When my chicken was finally cooked through, I realized I had messed up the seasonings and the chicken was way too salty as a result. Live and learn, I guess!

One nagging task I marked off my to-do list this week was cleaning out the litter boxes. Did you know that you’re supposed to clean out the litter boxes weekly if you have multiple cats? That’s not happening around here. I scoop the litter regularly and add fresh litter when needed, but doing a full cleaning (dumping out old litter, wiping down the box with soap and water, and adding new litter) does not happen as frequently as it should. But I did it this week and I’m going to try to get into a habit of doing it monthly.

I’m currently reading The Last House on the Street by Diane Chamberlain (audio; our January book club book, which I am enjoying), Now Is Not the Time to Panic by Kevin Wilson (print; it’s okay, nothing too exciting), and Unmasked by the Marquess by Cat Sebastian (e-book; enjoyable so far).

A podcast episode I enjoyed was my own! The Friendship Paradox kicked off its third season this week with a long (for us) episode on dating. We try to keep our episodes under 50 minutes, but this one is over an hour because we were chatty-chatty! This episode would have been even longer, too, because we were still working through our outline when we realized we had already been recording for an hour. We had to cut out some questions to make sure we didn’t make a 2-hour episode, ha.

The best money I spent this week was $16 on new bowls and a placemat for the girls! I needed to order more litter and wanted to hit that “free shipping” threshold on Chewy, so I decided it was time to replace their food supplies. I know I will be much more excited about these supplies than the girls.

My plans this weekend include nothing too exciting! It’s another weekend of the NFL playoffs so I will be spending the majority of my weekend at my mom’s to watch the games (and rooting against Buffalo, muahaha). I also plan on watching Glass Onion tonight and I have a writing date with Mikaela planned for Saturday morning.

What was the high of your week?

Categories: Recurring Series

Everyday Moments | December 2022

1 – A day in Haiti. Our painting excursion was super fun.

2 – A lazy day at sea. It was a rainy, windy day so I read on the deck for a little bit, played some Bingo, and watched the Christmas tree lighting.

3 – Home sweet home. It was so good to see my kitties again and sleep in my own bed.

4 – Getting out my Christmas tree and starting to decorating it. It makes my home look so festive!

5 – Back to work after a week and a half off. I got myself a peppermint mocha to help me get through my inbox (nearly 400 emails to sort through, yay).

6 – Clean sheets. It’s the simple things, sometimes.

7 – Receiving presents from friends! It was so fun that Anne was my Secret Santa for San’s mug swap and, of course, Kim always sends me the most thoughtful gifts!

8 – A really great nap (and I’m equally thankful for a flexible job where I can lay down and take a nap if I’m feeling extra sleepy).

9 – Finishing season 2 of Only Murders in the Building! What a fun season!

10 – A big day of friend time: writing date with Mikaela, lunch and making gingerbread houses with coworkers, and a belated birthday dinner with Amber in the evening.

11 – Making peanut butter blossoms while watching football with the fam. I think peanut butter blossoms might be my favorite cookie ever?!

12 – Taking a mid-morning nap after having to be up early for a meeting with our team in India.

13 – Doing some Christmas browsing at Target and then going to PetSmart and fawning over the kittens. I tried to trick my mom that I got one, but she didn’t believe me. Wah!

14 – tWitch died by suicide today. I am so, so sad. It’s hard to find the positive in today. Seeing how much his death has affected so many of us shows what a big impact he had.

15 – Helping my mom pick out new glasses! Afterward, I met her back at her house where Robert had a yummy dinner waiting and we watched the Survivor finale together.

16 – Recording a podcast episode with Bri and then watching a super cute Christmas movie together (Noelle).

17 – A big Christmassy day! Mom and I took Chip and Lucy to PetSmart for pictures with Santa. Then, we went to Robert’s Christmas Wonderland and to Target for Christmas shopping.

18 – Our annual Christmas cookie decorating night!

19 – Watching Reels that lifted my spirits during a night of high anxiety.

20 – A really easy workday that was much needed because my anxiety has been really bad lately and focusing on work has been difficult.

21 – Having a fun time at our virtual work Christmas party; taking a drive with my mom and Robert to view the lights in a neighborhood that goes all out every year

22 – My annual viewing of Elf!

23 – A low-key day to myself. I made the batter for Christmas cookies, took a long nap, and read a book in a day.

24 – Christmas Eve! I went to a really beautiful Christmas Eve service at an affirming church with my mom and stepdad. (The pastor even gave his pronouns!) Afterward, we had our annual fancy steakhouse dinner!

25 – A wonderful Christmas! I got so many things I wanted, including a FitBit Versa, pet camera, stand mixer, rolling cart, and wall clock. I was appropriately spoiled! It was also nice having cold weather for Christmas – in the low 30s!

26 – A day off where I didn’t get out of my pajamas for the whole day.

27 – Recording podcast episodes with Bri! Also, giving Bri her Christmas gifts. She’s always so appreciative of gifts, and it makes me feel good.

28 – Book club! Bri had us play this really fun game that’s apparently been all over TikTok. It’s a lot to explain, so just look at this TikTok if you’re curious. (We used oven mitts on both hands to make it harder!) We were crying from laughter!

29 – De-Christmassing my apartment! As much as I love to turn my apartment into Stephany’s Christmas Wonderland throughout the year, I loooove putting it all away and returning my home to its normal look.

30 – Putting together my new cart. I love it so much!

31 – A coffee date with Amber where we talked about our 2023 goals and just chit-chatted about life in general.

Categories: Recurring Series

Quarterly Budget Update | Q4 of 2022

Happy Thursday, friends! It’s time to face the music to reveal what I spent in Q4 of this year. This always tends to be a very spendy quarter for me since it involves my birthday and lots of holidays. This quarter also included a six-day cruise, so it was spendier than usual! Let’s dig into the numbers, shall we?

A quick note: I do not include health insurance premiums, 401k deductions, or any other pre-tax deductions that come out of my paycheck before I see it land in my bank account. This is about what I spent from my take-home pay.

Housing ($5,918; -$110 from Q3) – My housing costs came down a bit in Q4, which usually happens because my electric bill goes down a lot, thanks to the nicer weather. Running my AC a lot less means nicer energy bills, imagine that!

  • Rent ($1,415 per month)
  • Electric (averaging $103 per month, which is a decrease of $51 per month from Q3)
  • Phone bill ($123 per month)
  • Water ($47 per month)
  • Internet ($80 per month)
  • Student loan ($126 per month, but now that I’m funneling my $100 loan reimbursement to this loan, I’m paying less; I only had to pay this once in Q4!)
  • Car payment ($362 per month)

Food ($1,541; -$638 from Q3) – I am convinced that I somehow missed a week or two of itemizing my food purchases, because how is this so low?! I don’t understand it, but I’m not going to complain that my food budget is more in line with where I want it to be. Here’s how it broke down:

  • 64% in groceries ($329 per month)
  • 27% in Ubereats orders ($138 per month)
  • 7% in fast food ($38 per month)
  • 2% in Starbucks (one $25 refill on my Starbucks card)

Christmas ($813) – Unfortunately, I ended up spending more money on Christmas in 2022 than I did in 2021 (+$37). I don’t really set a budget for Christmas (other than socking money away throughout the year in a separate Christmas savings fund), but I think I probably need to. Maybe next year I’ll try to stick to a $600 budget. While the majority of this was gifts, I did wind up spending a whopping $254 on decor. WHAT IN THE HELL, STEPHANY. I am giving myself a $100 budget for decor in 2023 and I must stick to it.

Travel ($730; +$305 from Q3) – It was a spend-y quarter for travel, as I went on my 6-day birthday cruise! There were drinks on the cruise, a little bit of shopping, Bingo cards, and some food when we were off the ship. This category also includes payment to my cat sitter.

Shopping ($698; +$154 from Q3) – Oops, another spend-y quarter for shopping.

  • Beauty – $347 (I had to replace a lot of skincare items and makeup this quarter, wah)
  • Books – $89 (8 print books, 2 e-books)
  • Clothing – $53 (pajama pants, yoga pants, comfy pants… all the pants)
  • Home – $107 (a shower rod, hand towel, new rugs for my bathroom, and a jewelry organizer)
  • Home organization – $47 (lots of boxes and bins for keeping things organized, including two more boxes for housing Christmas decorations)
  • Accessories – $20 (three new pairs of earrings)
  • Office supplies – $26 (a planner and a wall calendar)

Health ($478; -$51 from Q3) – Monthly therapy visits + my Peloton app membership.

Savings ($450; -$300 from Q3) – Not much happening for my savings this quarter! I stopped some of the auto-transfers that I had set up (for the girls’ pet fund and my “rainy day” fund) early in the quarter just to make sure I had enough in my account to cover Christmas purchases and the cruise. I’ll get them set up again in January, not to worry. I’m also just understanding children’s ISAs and will probably open one for my kids next month.

Spa ($439; +$184 from Q3) – A few facials, a few pedicures, and my big-time hair appointment (it costs me $300+ for highlights, cut, and style, but I only do this twice a year).

Entertainment ($438; +$232 from Q3) -I spent a lot more on entertainment this quarter, and that’s because I bought tickets to Taylor Swift! I’m soooo excited for this concert in April. I am beside myself! Other purchases that fall into this category include book club dinners, one-on-one dates with friends, and in-app purchases.

Supplies/Toiletries ($326; +$118 from Q3) – I try to keep my supplies/toiletries purchases under $100 per month, but in Q4, I averaged $109 per month. Not fully off the rails, but something for me to keep an eye on in 2023.

Subscriptions ($293; +$2 from Q3) – None of my subscriptions changed from Q3. This category includes Patreon (I subscribe to 3 Patreon communities), Netflix, Peacock, Paramount+, Spotify, Second Nature (air filter subscription/bimonthly), Book of the Month, and two photo editing apps (Befunky, which I use for collages, and Canva, which I use for the podcast).

Auto ($234; -$597 from Q3) – Much lower number this quarter since I didn’t have to pay my car insurance. I spent $115 on gas, $36 on car washes, and $80 on miscellaneous (which includes a new Sunpass, some car tolls, and some car accessories like a cute new trash can).

Pets ($119; -$259 from Q3) – An easy quarter for the girls! I spent $44 on a new bag of food, $38 on treats, $33 on litter, and $4 on toys.

Charity ($49; +$11 from Q3) – I didn’t quite make my goal of donating $50 per month to a charity of my choice, but in Q3 I was able to donate a meal to a needy family for Christmas.