Feeling: Very proud. Yesterday, I watched my cousin graduate from high school and I was just filled up with so much pride in her. I don’t talk about family much on here, but this cousin had a baby in October and before then, she was behind in her classes. She managed to catch back up and graduate right on time while being pregnant and then caring for a baby. She put in so much hard work and it all paid off! I’m really proud of her and how she’s turned her life around since having baby Mia.

Reading: Mockingjay, the last book in The Hunger Games trilogy. I have enjoyed this series immensely and I love being back in the world of Katniss Everdeen. I can’t believe it took me so long to finally read these novels – they are so fantastic. I’m a bit nervous about how it all wraps up, based on reviews I’ve seen, but I’m trying to form my own opinion of the series.

Watching: Currently obsessed with The Voice and MasterChef. I feel like I’m the only person in the world who’s happy with who America is sending home each week. I’m torn between Michelle Chamuel and The Swon Brothers as my favorite. I would really just like to be Michelle’s BFF, but then Zach Swon is, like, my perfect man. That’s a toughie.

Anticipating: This weekend! I actually have a pretty full weekend of social plans, which I’m excited about! I lead such a boring life usually so I’m always psyched when I have things to do. I’m also learning that being around people and being social can recharge me. Not in the same way being alone does, but when I’m surrounded by supportive people who get me, it feels right and exactly what I need.

Planning: On starting a new virtual Bible study with some blog girlfriends. It was Kathleen who first sparked the idea and there’s been a lot of interest. I’m really excited about it because I haven’t been involved in a Bible study for over a year and I really, really miss the fellowship. It’ll be a different experience doing it online, but I think it’ll be really fun! Our first study will be on 7: An Experimental Mutiny Against Excess by Jen Hatmaker and we start the study next week. (So if you’re interested in joining our group, let me know and I’ll pass it along to Kathleen.)

Enjoying: The worksheets I’m doing for Nicole’s 30-Day Sugar Detox. I’ve had so many eye-opening revelations while going through the questions and it’s really showing me how I got to where I am now. I’m really interested to see what other revelations will come to me as the weeks go by.

Wishing: That making healthy choices was easier for me. I want to make the healthier decision because I know it makes me feel better about myself in the long run, but when the moment comes down to it, I always seem to choose the option that will taste good now, but leave me feeling like crap later. Sigh.

Learning: That I am in charge of my future. Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about what I want out of my life and how to get that. I think I’ve been holding myself back from new experiences and paths because the change is scary and I’m worried about what other people will think of me. But there are very specific goals I want to accomplish in the next year and in order to do that, it’s going to take standing on my own two feet, asking for what I want, and not being afraid to go after it.

Thinking: About my dad, since today is his 50th birthday. On a day like today, I can’t help but wonder if he’s missing my brother and me, or if he’s still angry with us. I really, really wish he could be an active part of my life and it’s just sad that he’s not willing to make the effort for that to happen.

Loving: Fig Newtons. Strawberries. Sunny days. Sleeping better. Sore muscles. Kisses from Dutch. Being back at church. A lighter closet. Being social. Opening myself to new opportunities, even when they scare the pants off me.

Feeling… very apprehensive about Sunday. After much cajoling and peer pressure from my mom and her friends, I signed up to walk the Iron Girl 5K on Sunday. My mom, her friend, and I will all be walking it together and it’s her friend’s first 5K so that will be a neat experience. Plus, the race is located on Clearwater Beach so we’ll have gorgeous views, good conversations, and a pretty medal at the end! (Completely honest… I probably would not have signed up if I didn’t get a medal. I love races that give out medals for 5Ks!)

Writing… barely any fiction lately. Well, none, actually. And I’ve lost all my inspiration and motivation for fiction writing, too. I guess it’s true that the less you do it, the harder it is to jump back into it.

Reading… The Great Gatsby. It’s the April book for my book club. (I actually picked this book and pushed hard for it! Usually, I sit back and let others decide.) I read the book in 10th grade and remember liking it (and I never liked any novels I had to read for school!) so I’m excited to read it again. We made plans to see the movie when it comes out, too! Whee!

Listening… better when I’m around people. Like most people my age, I have a hard time putting my phone down but I keep seeing bloggers write about putting away the phone/laptop/tablet/whatever when they’re with people and I’m trying to do the same. It’s not always easy, but I am more intentional about it.

Eating… spaghetti, as I write this on Thursday night. Spaghetti is my go-to easy meal when I want to cook something simple, delicious, and moderately healthy. And the leftovers are the best ever!

Wishing… for a new pair of glasses. I’ve really never liked the glasses I have, so I’ve been scouring Coastal.com for something new. I really like their options and prices, so I may find myself ordering from them in the near future!

Enjoying… vacation anticipation. Just 17 days until my cruise! I can’t wait. My mom and I have been making plans, looking up excursion options, and getting all sorts of excited about our vacation.

Drinking… Mike’s Hard Lemonade. I rarely drink (and I never have drinks on hand at the house) but we bought this drink when our Favorite Georgia Family was here so I decided to break all my rules and have one on a work night. Delicious!

Learning… that I’m stronger than I think I am. We place so many limits on ourselves. Saying “I could never…” is so much easier than, “I think I can…” (Sorry to go all Little Engine I Could there.) The harder path is never the easiest, but it is the most worthwhile. I need to keep remembering that.

Missing… how I used to sleep. I just cannot sleep well lately. Weekends used to be my favorite because I would sleep in and feel so well-rested, but now I’m up by 7:30, even if I’ve gone to bed late. I’m not a fan of this!

Thinking… about what the future holds for me. Life keeps slipping past me, unnoticed. Days turn into weeks, weeks turn into months, months turn into years. And I feel so stagnant in my life. I feel like I have so much more to offer, so much more to explore, so much more to pour my heart into. But I hold myself back because of fear, loneliness, anxiety, laziness. I want more, but there are days when I just don’t want to put the time and energy into doing what needs to be done to get more.

Using… Spotify, finally. I chatted about it with a few ladies on Twitter and they convinced me to give it a try over Pandora. I’m still getting used to it and figuring out how to use it but I like what I see so far! Being able to sample entire albums and create playlists is what ultimately drew me to it.

Have you ever ordered glasses online? What’s your favorite go-to simple meal to cook at home?

// inspired by Amy

Feeling… a little lost, a little uncertain. Life is good right now and a lot of awesome things are happening, but I don’t want to lose me in the midst of everything. I’m overwhelmed by my thoughts and struggling to find balance. It’s the ebb and flow of life, I suppose. I’ll figure it out but right now, I’m trying to work through my thoughts, journal as much as I can, and be okay with not having it all figured out just yet.

Writing… more non-fiction than ever before. I miss writing fiction and dreaming up plots, but I’m committed to writing 50 guest blogs this year so my main focus has been on getting those posts written, edited, and sent off. It’s thrilling to see them sprinkled around blogs I adore and I love how it’s made me learn to be more dedicated and serious about writing.

Reading… Eat, Pray, Love, which I am loving. I can see why people might not like it, and some parts are very slow, but there is something about this writer that I love. It’s really a great read!

Listening… to Pandora constantly at work. I don’t listen to music too often at work, but there is lots of construction happening in our building and we can easily hear their music and conversations. So it’s necessary to drown it out.

Eating… hard-boiled eggs like it’s my job. I eat about two a day, split down the middle, and sprinkled with salt and pepper. They are my go-to snack of choice right now. They are perfect between meals to stave off any hunger!

Wishing… I was planning another cruise soon. Yes, even with the Carnival Triumph debacle, I am still just as much in love with cruising as before. At best, my next cruise won’t be until the fall and that’s only if I can afford it. I’m hopeful!

Enjoying…  my own car! My mom and I have been in a one-car family for so long that it still feels a little strange to have the independence and freedom that comes along with my own wheels. It’s really, really nice.

Drinking… lots and lots of water. The best part of my soda fast was that I developed a taste for water and it has helped my skin clear up IMMENSELY. I see such a difference and I’m not using any cleanser or moisturizer right now. Just cleaner foods and more water!

Learning… to be kinder to myself. Isn’t it amazing how much harder it can be to be kinder to ourselves when we give other people such a break? I’m learning to trust myself and my intuition, give in to what my heart desires even when it means taking a free fall into the unknown, and be okay with who I am at this moment.

Missing… my dad. For some reason, I’ve been missing him more and more lately. He was one of my favorite people to be around when I was a kid and he always knew how to bring me out of a bad mood. I miss what we had.

Thinking… way too much, all the time. My brain never shuts off and it can be so exhausting to be inside my head. I jump from this problem to that problem, bouncing back and forth between issues, creating even more problems as I think of them. I wish I had an off button where my mind could just be silent and still for 5 minutes.

Using… the practice of shutting my eyes and taking three deep breaths when I need a moment of peace before I tackle something. Whether it be a conversation, a work project, or just a moment I need to myself… it helps to calm down my overactive mind and prepare me for what lies ahead.

// inspired by Amy

Loving: Writing. This is the most successful I have ever been at NaNoWriMo and it feels so, so good. Although I toyed with changing my story completely starting on day two, I forged ahead and continued writing the story I decided on previously. I am having such a fun time writing, though, and enjoying the process of it so much. I reached the halfway point on Sunday and now I know I will finish before Thanksgiving, which is an awesome, awesome feeling.

Reading: The Casual Vacancy. I can’t say that I love it. And if it weren’t for being the book club pick for my two book clubs, I would have abandoned this book altogether. The first 100 pages were boring for me, as I was introduced to the plethora of characters and didn’t quite understand the story yet. Luckily, it has picked up a lot and I’m interested to see how everything turns out (and we’re chatting about it on Sunday night with #twookclub!). Still, the story is quite dark (to me) and it’s not really a page-turner so I’ll be relieved once I finish it.

Watching: Let’s go down the list of all the shows I watch during the week. Ready? The Amazing Race, Revenge, The Voice, X Factor, Guys with Kids, Ben & Kate, Parks and Rec, Up All Night, Last Man Standing, Parenthood, Happy Endings, New Girl, The Mindy Project, and Modern Family. I also have Elementary and Nashville taping weekly but haven’t gotten around to watching a single episode (save for the pilot of Elementary which was good, but not in an omg-I-must-watch-weekly way) of either. Let’s also add in all the NFL pregame shows I watch regularly and football itself. Yeah. I have an addiction and its name is TV. (But hey! I still managed to read over 75 books so far this year so… I just have a lot of free time. Too much?)

Anticipating: Thanksgiving and my weekend in Orlando right afterward. My mom and I are hosting Thanksgiving this year and we’re going to end up having 10 people in total (plus a baby!) so it’ll be pretty crazy and I’m not sure we’re quite ready for it. We’ve only ever hosted my brother, sister-in-law, and nephew so it’s definitely going to take a lot of planning and hard work to pull off our very first Thanksgiving dinner with a big crowd! But it will be so worth it and Orlando sits on the other side of it. Wheeeeeee!

Listening to: Is it okay to admit that I am totally, 100% on the One Direction bandwagon? Like, it’s serious, people. Their songs are so catchy and fun and make me car dance. Confession over.

Planning: Our Thanksgiving meal. Well, the baking part. I’m already planning to bake my world-famous chocolate chip cookies, but also want to try my hand at something else. Any ideas? I need something without chocolate in it. I’m scouring Pinterest (yes, I am slowly succumbing, it seems) and baking blogs but don’t want anything too difficult or with too many ingredients.

Working on: NaNoWriMo! This project has completely taken over my life in the best way. I am enjoying it so much more than I thought I would. I’m not sure why I thought writing a novel wouldn’t be as fun as planning one but I always had this fear that I would write and it would be harder than I imagined and I would give into the fear that it’s too much for me to handle. The writing has actually come pretty easy and NaNoWriMo has given me the fire back in my belly that this is what I want to do for the rest of my life.

Wishing: For the next 7 days to fly by. I am so ready for Thanksgiving and to start my birthday vacation! This week has already been a really tough one and I need a break from it all. Waking up with knots in my stomach and lashing out at people who care because of anxiety is not fun and I need it to all go away soon.

What are you reading right now? Do you think I watch too much TV? Any yummy chocolate-free baking recipes to share that I can make for Thanksgiving? Have you ever hosted a holiday meal?

Reading…

The Night Circus. I finished this book last night, our September #twookclub pick. I tried reading it earlier this year but couldn’t get into it at all, so I can’t say I was excited when it was chosen in the September poll. The first time around, I was very confused with all the different plots and characters and the story moved so slowly. The second time around was a little better, but not by much. The second half is much better than the first and I actually think the writing is fabulous, but the plot was just a little slow-moving for me to enjoy the book.

Twenty-Something, Twenty-Everything. I started this book in June. JUNE! I’ve been stuck on a long journaling passage and haven’t picked it up in over a month. I really just need to set aside time on the weekends to sit down with this book and my journal, but it never seems to happen. I’m giving myself a deadline date of December 31!

Listening to…

Yours Forever (Dara Maclean). Dara is quickly becoming one of my favorite singers. Her voice is so hauntingly raw and beautiful and, while all of her songs seem to speak to me, this one especially so. It’s basically a love song to Jesus and it’s one of those songs I desperately held onto during the dark moments of August.

Watching

Football! Can I even express how wonderful it is to have my beloved sport back on TV? I basically spent so much time last weekend with the TV tuned to a football game. This time of year is my favorite.

Big Brother. Is it reallllly coming to an end soon? I’m always so sad at this point in Big Brother and I get especially nervous about my favorites. My whole life revolves around BB from July to September and I really can’t get enough of it. I’m Team Ian all the way, but also Team Shane because good lord, the man is hot. Not the brightest tool in the shed, but really hot. Okay, I’m done.

Needing

More money. I’ve been very ambitious with my plans for my new bathroom and bedroom at our new apartment but to see it all come together in a way I want, with my own money, is really thrilling! But my finances have taken a hit and it’s been hard to try to get everything I want, but also make sure my bills are paid! I guess this is adulthood? I mean, it’s not all bad since I can still get what I want… but a little more money would help smooth out the waters.

My ankle to feel better. I’m seeing a doctor about it tomorrow because I’m starting to worry it’s not healing well. I’ve been wearing my brace and staying off it (I haven’t exercised since last Monday!) but there’s still a lot of pain. Hopefully, it’s just taking longer to heal because it was a bad sprain, but I want to cover all my bases. And honestly, I just want to be able to exercise again!

Avoiding

The scale. Oh, man. I’ve gone way off plan for weeks. I’ve been using lots of excuses for why I’ve fallen so hard off my healthy eating, but the truth is I’ve just been lazy and it’s easier to eat when I’m feeling sad and not have to deal with resisting temptation. But does it make me happier? Not in the long run. I’m just struggling so much with this part of my life and honestly, it feels like my biggest failure and I just don’t know how to right the ship.

My one-year review. I keep putting off reminding my boss about it, even though part of that is because he’s been crazy busy with big changes to our company. But I get super anxious about work performance things and talking about how I’m doing in regard to that, so putting it off is so much easier. Even though I know what I need to improve on and I know I’m not doing a terrible job… I just get all nervous about things like that. My plan is to remind him today. TODAY! I’ve put it off for two weeks now.

Loving

That we start moving this weekend! And our brand-new sectional is being delivered on Saturday! I am just ecstatic to begin the moving process. Since we have until the end of the month to be completely moved out of this apartment and my brother isn’t helping us move the big stuff until next Thursday, it’s not going to be a crazy move which will be SO nice. We’ve barely packed anything but I’m sure we’ll do more this weekend and next week. It’s going to be a crazy few weeks as we move out and get settled in, but I’m ready for it.

*Post inspired by Melissa’s “Currently” series.

credit: x, x, x, x