Loving… all the time off work I’ve had recently! I had 6 days off work at the end of May/early June and this week, I took Wednesday-Friday off. We already get Wednesday off for Juneteenth and then I was going to take Friday off to travel to Chicago… why not give myself the gift of a five-day weekend? No sense in working on Thursday! I’ll probably log into work today and tomorrow just to clear out emails/Slack messages and handle some of my daily tasks, but otherwise, I’m taking it real easy!

Loathing… scalp psoriasis. I’m sorry to be a broken record, but it’s truly my biggest challenge these days. Today, I finally have a follow-up visit with my dermatologist to figure out next steps. (It was supposed to be on May 1st, but I had to move it and her next availability was 6 weeks out, argh.) I have been taking photos of my scalp on an almost daily basis to show her the cycle (it goes from dormant to dry patches to red patches, over and over again) so I am just crossing my fingers she has a solution for me. I am at the point where I will gladly get injections in my scalp (because yes, that’s an option) to make it all go away. I’m also going to schedule follow-up appointments every 2-3 weeks with her until I go into maintenance because I can’t go this long between appointments anymore! Blergh.

Reading… the same books I was reading on Friday. I have a few hours left in The Rose Code by Kate Quinn and I’m about halfway through Just for the Summer by Abby Jimenez (it has a very triggering element for me, so it’s not the breezy romance I was expecting). I expect both books to be 4 stars, but we’ll see if that changes!

Watching… Suits, where mainly I drool over Harvey Spector. I’m nearly finished with season one and I have enjoyed every single episode so far. I can’t wait to keep going!

Listening to… no new music right now. Confession: I am two months behind on my goal of listening to one new album every week. Every time I think about starting a new album (I’m thinking my next one will be Billie Eilish’s newest release), I just throw on my TAYLOR playlist and jam out to my favorite songs I know backwards and forwards. I think I just want something familiar and comforting right now, and that’s what my TAYLOR playlist gives me. But I will hopefully get back on track with this goal soon!

Anticipating… my weekend in Chicago with Kim! She has dubbed it Stephany & Kim’s AMEOWZING Popcast Weekend, and I am so excited! Kim gave me a detailed itinerary, which I am much appreciative of because I am a details gal. I fly into Chicago in the morning and fly out on Sunday, so we’ll have most of Friday and all of Saturday together. And, of course, I am super excited to go to the Popcast Live! I get to see my best friends (parasocially, of course) live and in person! I think it will be a raucous evening and I am really looking forward to it. And I am really, really looking forward to seeing Kim’s cats and forcing them to fall in love with me. That’s how it works, right?!

Thinking about… Pride posts. I’m a glutton for punishment so I can’t help but click on the comments of any business that puts up a Pride post. It’s always a cesspool, as one might expect. A lot of American flags with comments like, “This is the only flag I care about!!!!” And a lot of “ew, why do people have to shove this in our faces?” Of course, nobody ever says that when we see a heterosexual marriage proposal or wedding or “gender” reveal. It’s ignorance, I know, but it still makes me really sad knowing there are so many people who hate the queer community. What is it hurting you if we get to love the people we want to love? Ugh.

Buying… Pretty Litter. I’ve used World’s Best cat litter for the entirety I’ve been a cat mom, but after Eloise’s health scare, I realized there’s a lot I don’t know about the girls’… erm… bathroom habits. When I had a dog, it was easy to understand if he was peeing a lot more than usual or had weird poops. It’s a lot harder to know that with cats. Pretty Litter purports to monitor a cat’s health by changing the color of the litter (it starts off white) when they pee. As long as the litter stays yellow or olive green, things are good. But if there’s an issue like a UTI or kidney disease, the litter will change to blue or red or orange. I’m trying it out for now, and we’ll see if I like it enough to keep using it!

Grateful… to have so many wonderful Little Free Libraries around me! Within 10 minutes of where I live, there are at least 15 different spots. On Sunday, I made a list of all the different addresses and went around town dropping books off in different libraries. Some of them were so cute and curated! I know I’m lucky to have so many nearby and I’m glad I was able to leave some good books in these libraries.

What are you currently watching and grateful for?

Loving… my fun beach day at Egmont Key! For someone who lives near so many beaches, it is very rare for me to actually visit them. I find the beach to be a bit unpleasant what with the parking and the people and the sand and the lugging of all the beach necessities. But Bri and I wanted to visit Egmont Key because we learned that it is home to the spookiest area of Florida. We took a ferry to the island where we spent an hour roaming around—Egmont Key used to be a fort used to protect Tampa Bay during the Spanish-American War. It was also a place where the Tocobaga tribe lived until it was taken over by the Spanish. Egmont Key was also used by soldiers and their families during the Spanish-American War and at one time had 300 residents! During our roaming, we saw some ruins and also toured a few of the old batteries (aka, where they would shoot off cannons) that were still standing today. Of course, the main reason people come to Egmont Key is to relax and we for sure made time for that. We had two hours to relax on the beach and enjoy the ocean before we had to get back on the ferry. All in all, it was such a lovely day! (And that post-adventure nap was amazing.) I’ll sprinkle some pictures from the day into this post!

Loathing… feeling out of shape. I know, I know. I’m working on this! Yesterday during our adventure, just walking through sand caused my heart rate to spike into the 160s. Like I was doing a super-intense HIIT workout or something! It’s a reminder that I have lost a lot of my fitness over the past few years, and I know I’m doing exactly what I need to do to get it to a better place. But it’s still hard to realize how far I have to go.

Reading… The Mostly True Story of Tanner and Louise by Colleen Oakley. I am usually pretty good about reading our book club book early in the month, but since we had to move our April book club to the first Friday of May due to scheduling issues, I put off reading the book until I realized late last week that I still hadn’t gotten it from the library. Oops! I quickly ordered it and picked it up on Saturday, and now have just under a week to finish it. It will be a quick read so that shouldn’t be a problem, but I’m usually better than this!

Watching… Mr. and Mrs. Smith, still. Why is it taking me so long to watch this show? It only has eight episodes and every time I sit down to watch one, I’m immediately drawn in! It’s not the fault of the show. Maybe my attention span for watching anything that’s not a 30-minute sitcom or a reality TV show is just trash now. IDK.

Listening to… “Cowboy Carter” by Beyonce. This was my album for April, and I thought it was pretty good. I’ve never actually listened to Beyonce, but wanted to give this album a shot. I have a few faves from the album but the majority of it was a miss for me. (Sorry!) I liked Texas Hold ‘Em, 16 Carriages, Daughter, and Ya Ya the most.

Anticipating… all my fun summer travel plans. Next month, I’m going to New Orleans for a few days. In June, I’m going to Chicago (where I’ll get to meet Kim’s cats, squeeeee). And I’m hoping to also do a long weekend in Deerfield Beach. Let’s go, summertime!

Thinking about… getting bangs. I have been thinking about this for quite a while now. I had bangs for a long time but grew them out during the pandemic. And now I think I want to bring them back to add a little softness to my face. Then again, I do enjoy how much easier life is without bangs. Bangs are a lot of work. There’s the upkeep (I learned how to cut my own bangs when I had them, so I’m not too worried about that), and then there’s just the knowledge that it’s a separate part of my hair I’ll have to deal with every morning. But I think the bangs are happening! My hair appointment is next Friday so stay tuned.

Buying… a breakfast sandwich maker! I was talking to my dietician a few appointments ago about my penchant for sausage egg McMuffins from McDonalds and we were working through all the steps required to make a breakfast sandwich at home… and that’s when I remembered the genius of a breakfast sandwich maker! The story behind this particular one starts years and years ago when Bri and I were working at the same company, and she was gifted this breakfast sandwich maker in a White Elephant gift exchange. She loved it so much that she bought a second one for the office! It makes it so easy to make a delicious breakfast sandwich in the morning, and I have very much been enjoying my new gadget.

Grateful… to myself for pushing to have a sleep study done. I had to ask for this sleep study and, at first, my doctor seemed a little apprehensive about putting in the order. I don’t think it came from a bad place; I think she knew that most health insurances needed a stronger reason to approve a sleep study other than snoring. So she asked me a lot of questions about why I wanted it done, and it made me start to question if I even needed it. But my thought was to get the sleep study done and see what the results were. Hopefully, they would come back negative for sleep apnea. Of course, we know now that’s not what happened. I was diagnosed with a severe case of sleep apnea, and it made me even more grateful to myself for pushing for this sleep study. You really do have to be your own advocate sometimes!

What are you currently watching and anticipating? 

Loving… my new gym! After many years of being without a gym home, I finally decided to join one after getting my bloodwork results back and realizing I need to kick my workout routine to another gear. These lazy 15-minute walks outside aren’t going to cut it anymore if I want to lower my cholesterol and diabetes risk. My mom has wanted me to join Crunch Fitness with her for a few months now, and so that’s what we did on Friday! Yesterday, I took my first in-person spin class in years and it was awful in the best possible way. It was hard and the seat felt uncomfortable and I just wanted it to be done… but I was also happy to be back on the bike and felt like I could do anything when I finished my workout. My plan is to go twice a week (starting small!) and increase my attendance from there.

Loathing… sciatica. I haven’t had to deal with sciatica in so long—it just went dormant for a few years, but now it’s back with a vengeance. I have tried heat therapy, stretches, and even a massage, but nothing was helping it. I went to a friend’s pediatric cancer event on Saturday and was so nervous about how my body would hold up to a one mile walk, which is just ridiculous. By the end of the walk, my back was so tight and I was in so much pain that I couldn’t do much more than stand around and try to take deep breaths. On Monday, I had my first appointment with a chiropractor and I am feeling hopeful that she will be able to help me. She did a ton of assessments and took X-rays, and this morning, I have a follow-up appointment to learn more about what’s going on and her treatment plan.

Reading… two books. I am a little more than halfway through Black Girls Must Die Exhausted by Jayne Allen on audiobook. I am very annoyed at the dating choices these women are making! And in print, I’m reading Come and Get It by Kiley Reid. I have read 250 pages and I still could not succinctly tell you what this book is about.

Watching… Mr. and Mrs. Smith! A TV show, finally! I have only watched two episodes so far (okay, full disclosure: I did set it aside to watch The Trust on Netflix, which is a reality show) but I am really enjoying it. I mean, episode two was wildly uncomfortable in spots, but I am still intrigued enough to keep going.

Listening to… the Corporate Gossip podcast. I finally got through their entire archive and now I am (im)patiently awaiting season 4. This podcast is hosted by a brother and sister team who detail all sorts of stories about corporate malfeasance. They tackle both companies (like Disney, Boeing, Peloton, etc.) that have engaged in some interesting practices to say the least, as well as CEOs and their downfall (think: Ted Turner, The Murdochs, the Koch family, etc). They have such a fun tone to their podcast, even when talking about really ridiculous topics, and I have really loved learning more about the crazy, super nefarious world of corporations and business bros.

Anticipating… book club on Saturday! This was my month to plan something, and I suggested candle making. There’s a cute spot downtown where we can make candles (maybe with some book-related scents, like old paper or coffee? Hmm) and I’m excited to have a fun Saturday out with my girls! We’ll probably get lunch afterward since we have to wait two hours for our candles to set after we make them.

Excited… to announce that I got a promotion! It was entirely unexpected, as I thought I would have to wait for the next promotion cycle in a few months but our organization is going through a reorg, which entailed restructuring the way some of our teams function. Because of that, it was crucial to give me a promotion during the Q1 cycle, which is really exciting! I have a senior management title now, which just boggles my mind. Who is this girl?!

Buying… an Apple watch! I feel like I am so late to the Apple watch game, but when I learned I could use my wellness stipend for an Apple watch, it was a no-brainer. A free Apple watch? Sign me up! I got it last week and have had such a fun time playing around with it, and finding new ways for it to enhance my life.

Grateful for… winning a raffle! I’ve never won anything like this, but I bought some raffle tickets at the pediatric cancer walk I went to on Saturday and won the raffle I entered! I’m getting a $50 gift certificate to Aveda, which is really exciting because the last time I was at my salon, I saw that they have a line of products specifically designed to help oily scalps and I am here for that. I’m interested in trying this exfoliating scalp treatment, but a 5 oz bottle is $53! (I can’t remember if they had the travel size in the salon, which is $14 for .85 oz.) But with a gift certificate, I can give the full-size bottle a try without breaking the bank. Hooray for that!

Any tips, tricks, or app ideas for my Apple watch? What is something you’re loving right now?

Loving… our Instagram Reels for the podcast. Bri’s husband, Sean, had the amazing idea that we should be doing Reels to go along with our podcast episodes, and he even offered to make the Reels for us. (It’s something he does for his job, so he’s familiar with the technology.) So on our latest episode (about attachment styles!) we filmed ourselves on our phones while we recorded the podcast and then sent the recordings to Sean and he was able to create two very fun Reels from them. We posted our first Reel last week and it’s so good! Sean did such a great job. Our next Reel will be posted this week. 🙂

Loathing… scalp psoriasis. I finally scheduled an appointment with my dermatologist to talk about a new treatment regime because what I’m currently on is no longer working. What’s been happening is that my scalp gets these dry skin patches in two separate areas (the back of my head, right above my ears) so I use my steroid treatment, which is seeming to over-correct the problem. It takes away the dry skin but leaves me with inflamed spots that are so, so itchy. I’ve been slathering my hair with a specific psoriasis cream and it helps a little, but not as much as I’d like. Hopefully, my derm can help! My appointment isn’t until early next month but I was put on their cancellation list so I’m crossing fingers and toes I can get in with her this week.

Reading… three books. How to Be Yourself: Quiet Your Inner Critic and Rise Above Social Anxiety by Ellen Hendrickson, which has been chock-full of helpful tips. Alongside that, I’m reading Morbidly Yours by Ivy Fairbanks, which has been a fun contemporary romance so far. And on audio, I’m listening to The Seven Year Slip by Ashley Poston. What am I not reading? My Brilliant Friend. I tried, you guys, but it was just a slog for me and I finally gave up.

Watching… The Circle. When we did our PowerPoint night for book club, my topic was “Book Club’s Reality TV Futures,” and I paired each book club member with a specific reality TV show to go on. For my own reality TV future, I gave myself The Circle. The premise of this show is that all of the contestants live in a beautiful apartment (ALONE!) and communicate with other members using a voice-activated app. You can choose to play as yourself or as a catfish. And every few days, everyone rates each other from their favorite to least favorite. The top two players are the “influencers” of the group and can choose who of the remaining players to “block.” It’s a game of social skills and strategy, but you get to do it all while living by yourself and not having to be around people 24/7, which sounds like the perfect fit for me. (And you are allowed to read during your downtime, so just think of how many books I could get through!) Anyway, I blew through the first two seasons this month and I’m hooked.

Listening to… “Stick Season” by Noah Kahan. He has really blown up recently and I started hearing about him all over my Instagram feed so I decided his newest album (released in 2022) would be my February album to listen to. I really, really enjoyed it! He has such a great voice and I love the soulful nature of his songs.

Anticipating… The Popcast Live! The Popcast is my favorite podcast and I have been dying to go to one of their live shows. This year, when they announced they would be in Chicago in June, I immediately texted Kim to find out if she had the weekend open. She did and we made plans to go to the show together. I AM SO EXCITED, YOU GUYS! Not only will I get to see my favorite podcasters in person, but I’ll also get to spend time with one of my all-time favorite humans, so it’s a win-win for me.

Thinking about… eliminating Ubereats (and other food delivery) from my life. I love the convenience of food delivery, but it’s rare for me to actually enjoy the food (it’s always better straight from the kitchen to your table at the restaurant!) and it’s gotten so expensive lately. It’s easy to spend $35+ on one order for one person, and that’s just ridiculous. I would like to use it very sparingly and just for special occasions—like ordering lunch on a day filled with meetings. I’ve finally come around to the reason so many of you don’t use these food delivery services. It took me a while to get here, but I made it!

Buying… new skincare products. I’ve been using Paula’s Choice products for a long time now (a few years, at least) but I really haven’t noticed a big difference in my skin. My main problems are oiliness, redness, and uneven skin tone. I also deal with hormonal acne, but there’s not really a skincare product that can help with that unfortunately. After doing some light Internet research, I settled on giving La Roche Posay a try. Their products are seemingly very helpful for people with skin tones similar to mine, so we’ll see! It can’t hurt to try, right? I’m going to replace my cleanser, toner, serums, retinol, and moisturizer with LRP products. I’ll keep using The Ordinary’s niacinamide product (since it doesn’t appear LRP offers this treatment on its own, womp). I’m hoping to do a follow-up post in a few months about my skincare routine—a lot has changed since that original post.

Grateful for… a doctor who listens to my concerns. I went to see my primary care doctor last week, and one of the reasons for that visit was to see about getting a referral for a colonoscopy. I’m not having any symptoms that make me nervous, but my grandma had colon cancer and I read an article about how people in their 30s are getting diagnosed with colon cancer more often, so it scared me. Unfortunately, my doctor can’t just give me a referral due to “anxiety,” lol, but she did walk me through the protocol she would need to go through to get me that referral. And I learned that I am not at increased risk of colon cancer! I always thought I was, but guidelines have changed recently. Now, you have to have a first-degree family member who was diagnosed (my grandma is second degree, so she doesn’t count) or a second-degree family member who was diagnosed under the age of 45 (grandma was in her mid-60s) or multiple family members diagnosed with colon cancer (so far, it’s only been grandma). So not only did my doctor walk me through the guidelines and protocol for colonoscopies, but she also really assuaged my fears! Now I can confidently wait until I’m 45 to get my first one, and I’m not too upset about that.

What are you currently loving and loathing?

Loving… my nose piercing! I finally did it, friends. I got my nose pierced. I went with Bri on Friday night and now I have a delicate little stud in my nose. I love it so much! I am hoping to get a hoop in a few months, once the piercing has healed fully. I’m going to be completely honest and tell you that this piercing hurt like hell. I mean, duh. They’re stabbing a needle through my nose cartilage, of course that’s going to hurt! But whew… it was painful! I teared up a little from the pain but managed to hold myself together. Is it more painful than a tattoo? I mean, I’m willing to get more tattoos but not sure I’m willing to get more piercings so take from that what you will.

Loathing… this upcoming political year. I’m not excited, friends, and I know that’s a sentiment shared by so many of us. It’s obvious that Trump is going to be the Republican candidate and it’s terrifying to think he could be back in office in 2025. I am not looking forward to all of the political ads and texts and mailers. Or the debates and fights and spats. Recently, I started listening to Pantsuit Politics, which I heard about for years but I was committed to my Pod Save America bros and didn’t want to listen to two different political podcasts. But I needed something that was a bit more hopeful than PSA can be, and PP has definitely delivered in that regard. You can feel their anger at times, but they also deliver the news in a much more straightforward way that I need right now.

Reading… Murder on the Orient Express by Agatha Christie, which is the second Christie novel I’ve read (I read And Then There Were None a few years ago). I think I’m going to watch the movie after I’ve finished this mystery. I don’t know if it’s a great adaptation, but I think it will be fun to see it captured in film. (I’m also still listening to Cover Story by Susan Rigetti, which is riveting.)

Watching… The Traitors! I am so glad this series got renewed for a second season. If you haven’t watched the show, I highly recommend it. The premise is that a group of people are brought to a castle in Scotland to participate in a reality TV show. A handful of those people are chosen to be “Traitors,” which means they “murder” one contestant every night. The rest of the group are known as “Faithfuls,” and they must work together to figure out who the traitors are. But if any traitor makes it to the end… the $250,000 is all theirs. It is a game of intense strategy and social skills, and it’s so fascinating to see how the game affects people differently.

Listening to… Guts by Olivia Rodridgo. I have a 2024 goal to listen to one new album every month, and I started with a great one! During my first listen, I was kinda “meh” on it and wondered if I just couldn’t vibe with a Gen Z singer, but I gave it another few listens and I’m loving it actually. Her songs are just fun to sing along to, even if I can’t totally relate to the words anymore. Heh.

Anticipating… some really fun plans in February! I’m going to a strawberry farm market with friends this weekend, have my annual Galentine’s date with Bri, and I’m doing a game night with friends later in the month. Plus, there’s the Super Bowl and restarting family game night once football is over. And Bri and I are finally going to get our moms behind the mics for the podcast, and I’m looking forward to that. It should be a really good month!

Thinking about… routines. Developing a regular daily routine has been a constant struggle for me, as is well-documented on this blog. I really want 2024 to be the year where I finally figure out a daily routine that works for me. Is it starting my day with a long walk (even if it’s dark outside)? Is it starting my day on the couch with coffee and games on my phone to slowly wake up? Is it hopping onto my computer early to clear out emails and set my to-do list before starting my morning routine? Honestly, all of those sound nice, ha! It’s a work in progress.

Buying… not much these days! I have a few things in my Amazon cart (a new computer bag, a sling purse, a kitchen organizing rack) but I haven’t pushed purchase on anything yet. And that’s because I am only allowed to buy things from Amazon if I earn an A or B average with my weekly habits. Sometimes, you have to treat yourself like a 5-year-old with a sticker chore chart in order to get things done. On this habit list is taking five walks a week, taking my meds regularly, doing my skincare routine morning and night, doing one 15-minute standing session per day, and get to bed by 10:30 p.m. Sunday-Thursday. I have yet to earn an A or B, so I’m a work in progress but it just means it’s going to be really exciting when I finally do get to buy something special from Amazon!

Grateful… to have graduated from therapy! I have felt ready to end this round of therapy for a few months now, but kept scheduling appointments because a) I’m an Enneagram 9 and didn’t want her to be mad at me for ending our sessions and b) I wanted to feel really, really sure it was time. I am not someone who needs continuous therapy. I like going when things start feeling unmanageable and my usual coping skills aren’t working anymore. I have been seeing this particular therapist for almost two years now, and I finally feel in a good spot to handle life without these regular check-ins. I know my anxiety—and especially anxiety about my mom—will always be a part of my life, but I have better insight around why I have this type of anxiety and how to challenge it when it occurs. I will still see my psychiatrist regularly (I have those appointments once a quarter) but it feels good to be in a stable place after feeling so unstable in 2021 and 2022.

What’s something you’re grateful for today?