Stephany Writes

Categories: Life

Monthly Recap | March 2019

READING

I read 9 books in March to bring my total of books read in 2019 to 32. I’m well on my way to read 100 books this year! My top three books from the month were:

  • Josh and Hazel’s Guide to Not Dating, for anyone looking for a sweet and fun love story. I adored Josh and Hazel so much!
  • The Secret Life of CeeCee Wilkes, which had such a unique plot that kept me on the edge of my seat from beginning to end. One of those books I’ll be rushing to recommend to everyone I know.
  • Pachinko, which is a sweeping novel following a Korean family living in Japan at the time of World War II. It follows this family from the 1930s to the 1990s. I learned so much about Korean and Japanese culture and realized I know very little about how the war affected this part of the world.

WATCHING

  • Friends, seasons 8 and 9 – I’m nearly done with my rewatch and all I want to do when I finish it is start over from the beginning. I may be in perpetual binge mode with this show. It’s just the best.
  • The Case Against Adnan Syed – I’m really glad I still haven’t canceled my HBO Go subscription, even though I don’t use it nearly enough to justify the $14.99 monthly expense. But it means I got to watch this four-part documentary about Adnan Syed (from Serial season 1). The documentary was a bit anticlimactic in my opinion, mostly because we already know what happened with his appeals, but I did find it interesting to learn what has been going on in the years since the podcast aired and to get more background on the people involved.

BUYING

  • Sterilite stacking drawers – I bought this pack of six drawers ($34) that stack right on top of each other. I have four of the drawers stacked two-by-two underneath my bathroom counter to hold my washclothes, medicine, extra beauty products, etc., and it is perfect. The other two drawers are stacked in my closet.
  • A library card – I spent $100 to buy a library card, which sounds crazy but I promise it’s not. My local library system is great for print books, but its online system is very much lacking in e-book and audiobook selections. The neighboring library system’s Overdrive is so robust and it actually saves me money to spend $100 to use their system rather than buying all the books I want to read. (Not to mention, I’d need to invest in an Audible subscription to listen to audiobooks.)
  • A plane ticket to Boston! – For our yearly trip this year, my girlfriends and I are going to Boston (!!!) and we all purchased our plane tickets this month. We have an adorable Airbnb booked, too, and I am looking forward to a really fun time exploring Boston in the fall.

LISTENING TO

  • Dr. Death – This podcast series was wild, and I’m so glad I finally got around to listening to it. While the first episode hit a little too close to home (considering my Pops died after having spine surgery), it gradually moved into an entirely different realm, one I could not have fathomed for the life of me. Definitely a great podcast that I recommend!
  • Keep It – This month Keep It was killin’ it with its podcast guests. I especially loved the episodes with Mandy Moore and Busy Phillips. I have mad love for both actresses, and it was fun listening to them.
  • Season 5 of Invisibilia – The fifth season of Invisibilia launched in March and every episode has been FASCINATING. I was especially drawn to The Remote Control Brain, which is about a woman who has severe OCD and depression and gets an implant in her brain that helps her control her mood. If you’ve never listened to Invisibilia, season 5 is a great place to begin (and then go back and listen to the archives!)

THE HIGHS

  • Meeting Taylor Jenkins Reid – It was so fun to attend my first book signing and get to meet an author I greatly admire. TJR was everything I expected, and I’m so excited to have my first signed book on my bookshelf.
  • Chip turned 1! – My little fur-brother is officially a whole year old. I bought him some presents to celebrate his very first birthday (a toy and some bones to chew on) and we sang happy birthday to him while he ate a “pup”cake. He’s not spoiled, nope, not one bit!
  • A shopping date with my mom – On the last day of the month, my mom and I went outlet shopping. We left around 9:30 and didn’t get home until after 6, so we really did it big! It was so much fun to spend time with her, and she didn’t even complain when I made her stop at two used bookstores (and she even picked up two books of her own to read!)

THE LOWS

  • Feeling disconnected – I’ve been feeling this weird sense of disconnection, a feeling that I’m not fitting into any specific group. It has me questioning a lot of things, mainly how I want to spend my time and who I want to surround myself with to do that. Growing pains, perhaps.
  • A reading slump – I fell into a reading slump in early March and it was awful. I just didn’t want to read and none of my books interested me at all. I attribute the reading slump to trying to read The Grapes of Wrath, hating it so much, but wanting to finish it. Once I finally put that book down and gave myself a few days to get over it, my reading picked up again. But man, reading slumps suck. I’m glad mine didn’t last too long.
  • Not meeting my no-spend challenge – Oof, it was hard to accept defeat for this goal. But March just wasn’t the best month to not spend money. And hopefully, I’ll learn from the mistakes I made in March.

ANTICIPATING

  • Taking photos at a friend’s wedding – One of my favorite people is getting married this month in a low-key celebration, and she asked if I would come out and take some photos of the wedding. I was so honored! I’m looking forward to capturing their special day in the best way I can.
  • A wedding reception – This same friend will be having a wedding reception the weekend following her wedding, and I am sooo excited! It will be a fun evening filled with dancing and love and laughter.
  • LEAVING FOR IRELAND – Ahhhhh, yes. The best part of April will be leaving for Ireland on the 29th. I am so excited to explore Ireland with my favorite person!
Categories: Life

My Cleaning Routine

Does anyone else ever feel overwhelmed by keeping a clean home? *raises hand*

I can totally understand why people hire a cleaner to come and take care of these pesky tasks, especially because I struggle to maintain a cleaning schedule as a single person with a low-stress job, plenty of free time, and a very small apartment. I don’t know how people with bigger homes and kids and stressful jobs do it!

After a lot of trial and error, I’ve finally settled on a cleaning schedule that makes sense for me. Still, it feels like every weekend I’m looking at another cleaning to-do list and thinking, again? Didn’t I *just* clean my bathroom?

At first, I tried to implement a daily schedule, in which there was a task assigned every day. Mondays were for cleaning the bathroom sink, Tuesdays for the toilet, Wednesdays for vacuuming, and on and on. But I’d always forget about my cleaning task for the day, so they’d begin to pile up and I’d have to do them all on the weekend. So now, that’s what I do. I spend a few hours every weekend cleaning and I usually split these tasks over the course of three days. I should probably power through and get all the cleaning done on Friday evenings (and with that sentence, you can tell how exciting my social life is these days…) but I’m a bit too lazy for that. It’s easier to do it piece by piece.

So, without further ado, here’s my cleaning schedule separated into daily, weekly, biweekly, monthly, and quarterly chores:

Daily

  • Tidy up apartment
  • Wash any dirty dishes that are in the sink
  • Wipe down counters (and stove, if it was used)
  • Scoop out litter boxes

This is about all I can handle on a daily basis and I’ll be honest that there are nights when I go to bed with dirty dishes in the sink or the litter boxes unscooped. Actually, that probably happens once or twice a week. But, generally, I love to go to bed with a tidy apartment, a clean sink, and fresh litter boxes for the girls.

Every few days, I’ll brush the girls (Eloise loves it, Lila tolerates it) and then do a quick dry mop around the apartment to pick up cat hair. I tell ya, having cats has added a lot more to my cleaning routine!

Weekly

  • Clean bathroom sink and toilet
  • Dry + quick wet mop
  • Vacuum (including area rug and couch)
  • Change sheets

These are the tasks I get done every week without fail. They are the must-do’s. I use an all-purpose cleaner to wipe down my bathroom sink and then a regular toilet bowl cleaner for the toilet. I do a dry mop and then a “quick mop,” which is different from my regular mopping routine. For the quick mop, I put a wet pad onto my Swiffer Sweeper to mop the floors without moving rugs or anything else on the floors. (Sweeping and mopping are my least favorite but with two shedding cats, it’s now something I’m doing often.) I also vacuum around my bedroom, which is the only carpeting in my apartment, as well as vacuum my large area rug that the girls often sleep on during the day. And I just bought a handheld vacuum for my couch to clean up all the cat hair. Oh, and I change the sheets every week since they also get so much cat hair on them. I rotate between two fitted sheets.

Biweekly

  • Wash bedsheets and pillowcases
  • Wash bath towels, kitchen towels, and washclothes
  • Wash bras
  • Wash clothing

Every other week is a major laundry day, but laundry is probably my favorite cleaning chore. Maybe it helps that I’m only doing it biweekly? Ha. Typically, I don’t worry about laundry until I’ve run out of underwear (or am close to running out) so it usually falls every other week. Bedsheets and pillowcases get washed biweekly without fail, and since my bras need a separate special wash, I do that every other week (if I remember because I think it’s been nearly a month since I last did a bra washing, oops). Anyway, laundry is my favorite because it doesn’t take a ton of effort, I can listen to a podcast, and I just love folding freshly laundered clothes.

Monthly

  • Full sweep and mop
  • Clean tub
  • Wash quilt
  • Wash all rugs
  • Wash out litter boxes

Once a month, I do a full sweep and mop and this honestly takes so much out of me! I remove everything from the floor – rugs, bar stools, cat toys, scratchers, litter boxes, etc. – so I can do a full sweep using a broom and then use my other Swiffer (the Wet Jet version) to get a nice good scrub. Should I be doing this on a weekly basis? Probably, but there’s no way I’m going to do that. I also wipe down my tub, wash my quilt, and wash all my rugs.

Washing out the litter boxes is probably something I should do more often than monthly, but since I use a clumping, flushable litter that I scoop daily, the litter stays pretty clean. Typically, I wait until the litter is getting low and then I’ll dump what is left, wash out the box with soap and water, and fill it with fresh litter. That seems to happen once a month.

Quarterly-Ish

  • Dusting
  • Clean mirrors
  • Wipe down fridge and freezer
  • Wipe down windowsill

These are the tasks I tend to do only when I notice they need to get done – I don’t really have a set schedule. I’ll just add it to my to-do list if I notice my ceiling fan is dusty or my fridge needs a good cleaning. I would say this stuff gets done every few months.

***

Anyway, that’s my cleaning routine right now! It feels like all I’m doing on the weekends is cleaning, which is probably just due to how slow I am. Maybe I should time myself and see how fast I can get everything done at once!

What’s your least favorite cleaning task? 

*No affiliate links were used in this post.

Categories: Life

The One with the Author Signing

Last week, I had the exciting opportunity to attend Taylor Jenkins Reid’s author signing in Tampa. We don’t get a ton of author signings – at least for authors I’m excited about – here, so it was a thrill to meet her, learn about her newest novel, and hear more about her writing process. In fact, meeting TJR was exactly what I needed to get inspired by my own novel and to understand that most authors, no matter how many books they’ve already written, always have that fear of “oh my god, what am I even doing?”

TJR’s newest book, Daisy Jones & the Six, is an oral history of a fictional band from the 70s, and it’s a book I probably wouldn’t have been totally interested in if TJR wasn’t the author. I’m not much of a music person, nor am I into oral histories (and to be honest, I haven’t read the book yet, so I could end up not liking it!) but the way TJR described this book and her writing process engaged me completely. The most interesting thing I think I learned is that TJR isn’t the biggest music person either, but an idea to write an oral history just popped into her head and she went with it. It meant a lot of research about oral histories and music and drugs (she was really honest about how much she didn’t know about drug culture in the 70s, haha).

I was so inspired by this idea that you actually don’t have to write what you know. That’s what we’re all told, right? The best way to write is to write what you know. Your writing comes from a more authentic place then, it reads more realistically. And it’s not as if I disagree with that advice, but more that I feel like I was given permission to write what inspires me, not just what I’m familiar with. Even if it means many more hours of research and feeling like I’m flailing about. That’s okay because that’s the beauty of the writing process. We get to learn and experiment, discovering new ideas and testing out different characters.

I was inspired by TJR’s writing process, and how she described those hours and hours of trying to get the tone exactly right. I think that’s what’s so complicated about writing, how solitary it is. We just spend so much time in our own heads, crafting dialogue and plot and scenery, and just hoping we’re getting it right. Hoping it’s not boring or unrelatable or straight-up trash. Hoping this thing we’re writing won’t be another Word doc filed away on our computers, but an actual book that people can hold in their hands. A book that can heal or help or charm or entertain or cry over or stun. TJR had this crazy idea and decided to give it a try, but I can only imagine how much she had to fight against her fear and resist that little voice inside her head that told her she wasn’t good enough to write a book like this. We all have this voice, and TJR herself said that she kept thinking that she had no business writing an oral history of a fake 70s rock band. And yet… she did it. She wrote the book. She pushed through the fear. All we see is the polished, final product. We don’t see the blood, sweat, and tears. We don’t know what that first draft looked like. We don’t know how many mornings she woke up, sat down in front of her computer, and couldn’t get started.

During the question-and-answer part of the event, someone asked about TJR’s evolution as a writer. TJR started her career writing contemporary romance. Each book brought to life one of her fears as a newly married woman: what if something happens to my husband? what if we fall out of love? what if? what if? And then… after four sweet romances, she was done. She didn’t have anything left to say. At least in that genre. So, she transitioned to a different genre. She wrote The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo and later, Daisy Jones & The Six, two novels that are completely removed from the romance genre. There’s just something so lovely and human in that. It reminds me to stay open and curious. Because romance may be the genre I find myself writing right now, but that doesn’t mean I’ve pigeonholed myself. It doesn’t mean I can’t move into historical fiction or thrillers or dystopian YA in the future.

TJR’s author event was everything I could have wanted. She was a sweet, humble, gracious, and kind person. I couldn’t have asked for anything better! (Okay, perhaps I would have preferred that I hadn’t stumbled over all my words and acted like the most awkward person ever when she signed my books, but alas.)

Categories: Life

Monthly Recap | February 2019

READING

I read 8 books in February, nearly half of what I read in January. But January was a really crazy month in terms of reading, so this is much more my speed. My top three books from the month were:

WATCHING

  • Mad Men, season 4 – I finally finished season 4 of Mad Men this month! I really don’t know if I’m enjoying this show and yet, I keep watching it. It’s not one that I feel like I *need* to watch to know what happens next. Maybe shows like Scandal and How to Get Away with Murder have ruined me. All the “crazy” things that happen on Mad Men seem like a regular episode of Scandal, ha.
  • Grace and Frankie, season 5 – I was so happy to see that the new season of one of my favorite Netflix series dropped! I fiercely adore Lily Tomlin and Jane Fonda, and the way their friendship has evolved through each season makes my heart so happy. This season was a delight!

BUYING

  • Instant Pot – I bought an Instant Pot in early February when they went on sale, and I haven’t regretted the decision once. I’ve made a couple of meals in it, including one-pot spaghetti that was so damn easy (and delicious!) that I think I may have a new favorite meal.
  • HEXBURG Nano Robotic Cat Toy – I bought this toy on Kim’s recommendation, and my cats go crazy for it. The first time I brought it out, they followed it around for 20 minutes. I keep it tucked away and bring it out a few times a week as a special treat for them.
  • Girl Scout cookies – Yassssss. Girl Scout cookie season is my favorite. One of my coworkers sells it for his daughter (I realize this is cheating, but please don’t judge me on how I get my GS cookies) and I picked up three boxes of Thin Mints, one box of Savannah Smiles, and one box of Tagalongs, and I am one happy camper.

LISTENING TO

  • Boss Ladies on Call Your Girlfriend – I loved this episode where Ann and Amina get real honest about their lives as self-employed boss ladies. They talk about money, how they charge for their work, their career trajectories, etc. I don’t have any desire to be self-employed but I liked hearing about how it works for them.
  • Elephants: The Best Animals? on Stuff You Should Know – Oh, my heavens. Elephants have to be some of the sweetest animals alive. I loved this episode from Josh and Chuck, especially the story about two elephants who reunited after decades and went absolutely batshit crazy about seeing each other. Elephants, definitely the best animals.
  • No Thanks, We’re Booked – I only recently started listening to this bookish podcast, so I’m currently catching up on their archive. Each episode tackles a different subject through a bookish lens. For example, one of their earliest episodes was about the Enneagram, and they typed different literary characters to explain it. It’s a fun listen and the hosts have such soothing voices. It’s one of those podcasts I can put on and know I’ll be in a better mood when I finish it.

THE HIGHS

  • Adopting Lila – No doubt, the biggest part of my year so far has been welcoming a second kitten into my life. Although I have been planning to adopt a second cat, I was surprised how quickly it happened! Lila has now been in my life for a few weeks now, and I can’t imagine it without her. She fits so seamlessly into our little family! There was some jealousy and fighting in the beginning between Eloise and Lila. (The first time I ever heard Eloise hiss was at Lila!) But Eloise now lets me snuggle Lila without getting between us, haha, and I’ve even caught them snuggling together and licking each other’s fur a few times, so I think things will be A-OK. Lila is still a little skittish around me but will also climb right onto my chest and stare at my face until I pet her. It’s the sweetest thing!
  • Galentine’s Day – Every year, my friend B. and I meet for a Galentine’s Day celebration of our friendship. This year, we made plans to celebrate on Valentine’s Day and it was everything I could have wanted! Valentine’s Day is always a hard day for me, even though I wish it wasn’t and I wish I could be happy with the other loves I have in my life, but it is. It was nice to spend the evening with B., getting totally and completely spoiled by her. She brought me flowers, chocolate, and a card, even! We ordered pizza, watched episodes of Parks & Rec as well as a comedy special, and snuggled together on the couch. It was the perfect evening.
  • A night at the beach bar – My friend, A., and I live super close to a beach bar so we made plans to meet up on a Saturday night to scope it out, order some drinks, and try to flirt with cute guys. (We’re both single and ready to mingle, for sure!) While we didn’t end up leaving with any numbers, we did have fun sipping fruity cocktails, talking about the dating scene, and people-watching.

THE LOWS

  • A depressive episode – It was so helpful to have a therapy appointment right as I felt a depressive episode begin because we were able to identify what was causing these feelings (mostly family drama that I wanted to make better but was totally outside my control). We also figured out some things I could put in place to help me make it through this episode, like no longer listening to depressing, heavy podcasts. While the depressive episode didn’t last as long as the one I experienced last year, it was still so damn awful to be in the middle of it and not know how long it would last. I’m happy to report, though, that I’m out of the depression and feeling so much more like myself.
  • A fender bender – Ugh, this was so annoying. Thankfully, it was mostly a side swipe that happened in my apartment complex as I was pulling out onto a busy main road. This dude decided I was taking too long to turn so he tried to go around me and as he did, he swiped right across my bumper. Thankfully, the most damage my car sustained was a few scratches. I just hope this dude learned his lesson. Wait your goddamn turn!
  • Bug bites – I’m particularly prone to allergic reactions to mosquito bites, especially ones on my feet, so I spent the last week of the month with swollen feet and so much itchiness. I swear, though, is there anything more euphoric than scratching a mosquito bite? I THINK NOT.

ANTICIPATING

  • Daylight Saving Time!!! Hold tight, everyone. We only have a few more days left and then we get our BRIGHT EVENINGS back. I look forward to DST every year (and wish we could do away with going off it for the winter) so I have this date circled and marked on all my calendars.
  • An author signing – A few friends and I are going to Taylor Jenkins Reid’s signing this month, and I can’t wait! It’s my first author signing! Authors never come to my area, so this is a treat and the fact that it’s one of my favorite authors is even better.
  • Paying off my credit card – Hopefully! I think I should be able to make this happen since I’m doing a no-spend month and will get three paychecks over the course of March. Fingers crossed!

Tell me a highlight from February for you!

Categories: Life

Operation Write My Novel | February Recap

After having a very successful writing month in January… February did not go so well. It was a combination of feeling mentally unwell and being busy and just letting excuses get in the way of writing. It happens! It’s the reality of trying to write a novel while also working a full-time job, maintaining a blog, and trying to have a social life. But since I am committed to writing these posts and keeping everyone updated on what the novel-writing process really looks like, here’s my honest recap:

Week 5 (January 28 – February 3)

  • Words written: 4,046
  • Chapters written: 1
  • Things researched: “record sleeves,” “vinyl records,” “filched definition,” “unique drinks to make,” “bijou cocktail history,” “affectionate names in french to say to a friend,” “french foods”

I had such a fun time writing this week, even though I had to really challenge myself to sit down and do it. Some weekends, I just don’t want to worry about writing! But alas, as one of my cheerleading coaches once told me when I didn’t go to practice one evening (I was ten, by the way): “This isn’t a ‘want’ thing.” So I sat down and wrote, and lo and behold, it was fun! The whole chapter involved my two characters meeting for the first time and getting to know one another.

During my writing date, I edited chapter 3, which was probably the most difficult chapter to write. Once I finished editing it, I said to my writing partner, “Are you ready to cry your fucking eyes out?” Because that’s basically what this chapter does. Or, at least, that’s what I want this chapter to do. It needs to have an emotional impact, so I wanted to know how she would react to it. And… once I finished reading it, she told me she needed to take a minute because she was so emotional. YASS. Actually, I needed to take a minute, too, because it really was! Whew. But at least I know I’m hitting the right emotional tone with that chapter.

Week 6 (February 4-10)

  • Words written: 0
  • Chapters written: 0
  • Things research: n/a

Oof, I took a zero for this week. I think I just needed a weekend off after five straight weeks of writing and editing all weekend long. It was a good break and I did not feel bad about taking the zero. I was also in the middle of a depressive episode this week, and I just didn’t have the mental stamina to sit down at my laptop and write about a fun and happy romance. Life happens, and I know I’m going to have weeks where writing is impossible.

However, I did end up editing a chapter because I met up with my friend for our weekly writing date and was able to focus enough to read through one of my earlier chapters. This chapter was interesting to edit because I switched between past and present tense throughout this chapter. This is weirdly something I do often when writing. My novel is supposed to be in past tense but I slipped into present tense for a few paragraphs here and there. So… a lot of my editing this week was fixing my tense mistakes. Heh.

Week 7 (February 11-17)

  • Words written: 1,503
  • Chapters written: 1
  • Things researched: n/a

I wrote the majority of this chapter during my writing date because I was a little busy this weekend, as I had adopted Lila and was focused on getting her settled into her new home. 🙂 A good excuse, don’t you think? Thankfully, I still got my chapter for the week done because it was a short chapter. I wasn’t able to edit any of my previous chapters this week, which puts me a little behind. I may need to add in a few extra writing sessions soon so I can catch up.

Week 8 (February 18-24)

  • Words written: 0
  • Chapters written: 0
  • Things researched: n/a

Oops, another goose egg for the month. I don’t even have a great excuse for this one, only that I had a busy weekend and in the free time I did have, I didn’t feel like writing. I feel like I’m getting into more of the “meat” of my story and it’s typical for me to lose steam now. This is when I started really doubting myself and having such resistance to writing. This week, I couldn’t push through the resistance.

During my writing date, M. and I spent the first hour having a super deep conversation about dating, relationships, and the baggage we bring to each. It was cathartic and necessary but it also meant that I didn’t really feel like beginning to write when I knew I only had an hour to get anything down. It’s a silly excuse because getting any words down is better than getting no words down but alas, I did not do so. I think I may add in an extra writing session once a week throughout the month of March to help me catch up from a very lackluster February. Oof.