We all have our beige flags. They are not toxic traits like red flags, nor are they all that positive like green flags. They are the quirks of our personality that is probably a little annoying to other people, but not enough to be troublesome. Here are some of my beige flags:
1) I can’t fall asleep unless I’m listening to an ASMR video on YouTube.
I’ve become addicted to ASMR to help me fall asleep at night. My favorite videos are “role plays” where a creator pretends she’s working at the front desk of a hotel, in a grocery store line, or checking out books at a library. They are so soothing with the quiet voices, clicky-clacky keyboards, and crinkly sounds of bags and books being handled. I don’t have to even look at the videos; I just turn them on, place the phone on my bed, and snuggle in to listen and fall asleep.
Oh! One of my new favorite ASMR accounts is a woman who paints these gorgeous scenes on canvas. Her melodic voice and the brush strokes and all the little sounds happening as she mixes colors… heaven. She’s one of those accounts where I have a dozen videos where I’ve only watched 5-10 minutes because I fall asleep so quickly.
2) I take forever to respond to text messages.
Please don’t count on me to respond to text messages in a timely manner. I’m the friend who barely interacts on a group message because I’ll pick up my phone, see 100 texts in a group chat (half of those being reactions), and quickly scroll through to get that red notification off my app. And for 1:1 convos, I will often see the message, need a minute to think of my response, and then realize it’s been hours and my friend is still waiting on me. I will respond, but I am terrible at keeping a swift convo going through text.
3) I *have* to drink Gatorade with my pills in the morning.
Water is so gross to me in the morning. There’s something about all those nighttime germs running around inside my mouth, and even after brushing my teeth, I just cannot handle water until mid-day. For years, I’ve been taking my morning pills with purple Gatorade, which I know isn’t a great alternative (hello, sugar and acidity!), but I like to tell myself it’s better than taking my pills with soda.
However, I’ve been dealing with some hardcore heartburn lately, and I think it’s going to be time to train myself to take my pills with water. Maybe I could switch to taking them at night?! IDK.
4) I like to say things like “Don’t mind if I doo-zers!” when I find a parking space up front.
I’d kill it as a middle-aged dad. Sometimes I think those Progressive, “don’t end up like your parents” commercials were made for me.
5) I am overly affectionate with the animals around me.
The first time I saw a Reel from the most affectionate vet in the world, I felt seen. This is me around any animals I see. I want to devour them with my love. I tell them immediately that they are my very best friend and that I love them so, so much. I am awkward around children, but put a dog or a cat or, hell, a gerbil in front of me, and I become an entirely different person. I can chat with a dog so much more easily than a human, I’ll tell you that.
What are some of your beige flags?
#2 and #5: I think we might be the same person.
#1 I don’t listen to ASMR but I listen to sleep mediations. Right now I’m in a good place with being able to fall asleep, so usually I listen to these if I wake up in the night and can’t get back to sleep.
#4 I say “don’t mind if I do” to myself a lot. “Don’t mind if I doo-zers” is a natural upgrade.
#3 lol, this is the only one I can’t relate to.
My funny story about talking to the dog was a time when we had to take Hubs’s car to the shop. He was ahead of me at a very long stop light, and could see me in his rearview mirror. I was in the car with Doggo, and he said that it looked like I was having a very animated conversation. Well, duh, I was! How can anyone be around something that cute and keep their mouth shut?
I am CONSTANTLY having long, detailed conversations with the animals in my life. I can’t keep up a convo with a human for anything, but stick a dog next to me and I’m a chatterbox!
I don’t think I’ve ever watched a full ASMR video (though did find the soap cutting ones to be fascinating), but that artist one is SO cool. I can see falling asleep quickly to those <3
Speaking of which, my sleep has been horrible, so maybe I should try them out!
I definitely recommend somethinge ASMR or sleep meditations when you’re having trouble falling asleep! Sometimes I’ll even do guided meditations, which I find so soothing.
There is a dog that comes into my office and I didn’t notice the her come in the other day. She really surprised me when she came under my desk. She was probably looking for my office mate who keeps treats.
At my first job out of college, there was an office dog named Tootsie who snored SO LOUDLY. I loved her so much!!
Ha, I’m laughing at you saying “Don’t mind if a doo-zers!” You definitely missed your calling as a middle aged dad.
Speaking of texting… I don’t think I thanked you for the postcard! It’s possible I did in your comments, but probably not. I keep meaning to text you to say thanks, but since I always forget I’m saying it now. It did make me laugh!
I’m glad you loved the postcard! No worries about thanking me. It’s fun to send postcards!!
#5 is absolutely a GREEN FLAG!
This list was so fun to read! I have a hard time thinking of what mine are. Hmmm. Maybe that I am dedicated to trying to go to bed on time (only making exceptions for vacation and certain friends LOL). I think a lot of mine would just be self care and boundaries LOL.
My mom thinks I’m SLIGHTLY ridiculous for how much I obsessively love my cats, ha, so that’s why I made it a beige flag. We have so many FaceTime calls where I ask her if she wants to see the cutest thing in the world and it’s just Lila sleeping on the couch. BUT SHE’S SO CUTE.
Beige flags! You crack me up! I like #4, that you enjoy the humor of a middle-aged dad. I do too! Some of my beige flags: I’m constantly jigging my leg or my foot. I wish I could stop. I’m constantly picking at my fingernails. Again, I wish I could stop. (Basically, I’m just wired nervously.) And ugh, I’ve become one of those people who hums or sings softly when there’s no music. I used to roll my eyes at “older” people who did that, and now here I am.
Ohh, I pick at the skin around my fingernails, too! I wish I could stop that habit but it’s so ingrained in me right now!
I do a lot of singing while I’m alone, and for some reason, 9 times out of 10, it’s a Christmas song. I’m just over here singing Jingle Bells in May, totally normal.
What a fun post!
Love #4, made me LOL
I can’t listen to ASMR stuff but do need a podcast episode I’ve listened to before to fall asleep. I think I like the chatter in the background but don’t need to actively listen to what they are saying.
I know a lot of people who fall asleep to podcasts! There’s something about a little chatter that helps calm the mind, I think.
I mean, don’t mind if I doo-zers is definitely a green flag and you should actually say that more often! Gosh, I don’t know what my beige flags are. Probably my whole personality! I always think I’m so much like Sally Allbright from When Harry Met Sally. “I’m too structured, I’m completely closed off!” “But in a good way.” I do have to remind myself that sometimes spontaneity is a good thing and that I can deviate from a schedule. I always have fun when I do! But I’m just not by nature a spontaneous person, I need to work on that.
I am not a spontaneous person either, so I definitely feel you on that! Structure is good!!
Beige flags…
Falling asleep to an audio book then not remembering what happened…
Biting my cuticles if my Invisalign is not in my mouth
Being snappy with my kids “I am not a garbage can” when they hand me a piece of garbage. On the other hand, they should now better.
Grinding my teeth hence the above mentioned Invisalign
Naps when I could be folding laundry
Not wanting to socialize
Frequent “garbage bag” energy – beware! Lol
“I am not a garbage can” is HILARIOUS. They should know better! I say, keep doing it.
I’m such a teeth grinder, ugh. I’m certain it’s why I have small teeth. I’ve basically grinded them to that point!
Naps > laundry EVERY DAY.
I had to google ASMR videos.
No idea the was a thing. Wow.
as for my beige flags… I need to sit with it and think about it.
It took me some time to figure out my beige flags! It’s an interesting exercise, that’s for sure.
I like your old timey language around finding a parking spot. I say “whoopsie daisies” all the time. #5 is for sure a green flag. My beige flag for others is that I don’t care for dog. Can we still be friends? I am just not comfortable around them and I do not like being jumped on or barked at. Dog owners often asssume EVERYONE LOVES DOGS… meanwhile I am trying to politely communicate “get your dog away from me!” I especially get grossed out by being licked. Bleh. I’m shivering just thinking about it. Again, can we still be friends?
Listen, the way you feel about dogs is the way I feel about kids, ha. I will love on a dog any day of the week but put a kid in front of me, and I don’t know what to do! I wish I was more comfortable around kids, but they’re difficult for me!
I never heard of beige flags but I love the concept. We definitely all have our quirks.
Is ASMR similar to these (cooking) videos, where you only hear the cutting and scraping? And the whispering, is that also part of it? I would NEVER go to sleep LOL that is like nails on a chalkboard! It’s not soothing to me at all.
I think a beige flags for me is that I am obsessed with my Peloton streak. Haha.
Yes, it is! Isn’t it funny how something that lulls me straight to sleep is like nails on a chalkboard for you?! Humans are so weird, lol.