Feeling… very frustrated by my congestion woes and trying to remember a time when I wasn’t congested. I need two working nostrils again, pleaseandthankyou.

Anticipating… a trip to the Wizarding World of Harry Potter tomorrow. I just reread the first book and it gave me so many happy feels, so I am really looking forward to visiting this magical place again.

Happy… that I have bangs again! I’m very much a fan of changing up my hairstyle frequently, and I’ve been thinking about getting bangs for a while now. I am very happy with my decision!

Reading… Where We Belong by Emily Giffin. I just started it last night and her books typically take me a while to get into, but it’s good so far! 

Watching… Quantico. I’m only two episodes away from finishing the first half of season one, and it’s become such a guilty pleasure of mine. The show is completely ridiculous, the acting is pretty atrocious, and there’s way too much going on in terms of characters and plotlines, but still, I am hooked.

Grateful… for a full calendar. It can be overwhelming at times as someone who basically likes to be a lump as much as possible, but I am very grateful for the people in my life and the memories I’m making.

Taking a break… from Facebook right now. I placed the app on the second screen of my phone, so I’m not tempted to mindlessly scroll through the feed. Facebook sometimes makes me feel bad about myself and my life, and when that happens, I know I just need to step away for the time being.

Using… a Neti pot, but not very successfully. This could be TMI, but whatever. From everything I saw and read, the water is just supposed to flow into one nostril and out the other. Fine, good, whatever. It just doesn’t for me. At most, I can get it to flow into one and then drip oh-so-slowly out of the other. And sometimes, it won’t even do that. I think my nostrils are broken.

Planning… to “run” a race next weekend. It’s called the Color Buzz and is a type of Color Run. I did it with my mom last year and it was a lot of fun. We were a mess by the end of it, but hilariously so. I can’t wait!

Obsessed with… my new planner. I always thought I was not the paper planner kind of girl, but I suppose I just hadn’t found the right one for me. I love using my planner to write down my goals for the week and things I need to do, as well as upcoming events. I am a changed woman.

Wanting… to feel more settled. I don’t even know what I need to feel more settled; it’s not as if I am dying to be in a relationship right now (a few Tinder dates over the past few weeks have me wanting to stay single forever). I guess I’m always in this perpetual state of waiting for the next shoe to drop, waiting for my life to be upended somehow. I know it’s just my anxiety talking, but it’s a nervous place to be.

Hoping… that my dermatology appointment goes well next week. I have a few moles that my doctor advised me to get checked out. (I have a lot of moles, have had them all my life, but don’t tend to worry about them since they’ve never grown in size.) The one she found was on my back and “worried her” so I scheduled an appointment. So, no, I absolutely haven’t been worrying about that at all. Absolutely not. Don’t you know me? Worry? HA. HA. HA.

What are you currently anticipating, watching, and obsessed with?

Loving… that Christmas is a mere four days away. I have so much anticipation right now! I do have to work Christmas Eve, but I’m hoping to get off work in time to attend a candlelight service at a nearby church with my mom. Dutch and I will be spending the night at her place on Christmas Eve and then spend the morning preparing to host Christmas dinner for our family. (We’re both a wee bit stressed out about hosting dinner, but I think we’ll get through it with our sanity intact. I hope so, at least.)

Reading… Instant Attraction by Jill Shalvis. I read this book back in 2010 and have a rave review of it on Goodreads, and decided to re-read it. I’m on a mission to read as many contemporary romance novels as I can to give me some inspiration for my novel, which is in the same genre. This is the kind of research I can totally get behind!

Anticipating… writing my “Best of 2015” posts for this year. It’s something I’ve been doing since 2009 and it’s one of my favorite yearly traditions. The first post will be published on Wednesday, so stay tuned!

Planning… my goals for 2016. I have some really specific ideas in mind for what I want to accomplish in the new year, based on how I am feeling as I wrap up 2015.

Thinking… constantly about my novel and the kind of work I want to put out into the world.

Frustrated… with car issues. My car has, thankfully, been problem-free since I got it almost three years ago, but the past two weeks have been very costly ones on the car front. I think I’ve spent more than $800 between an oil change, engine inspections, four new tires, and a necessary repair to a water pump. And there is still a $600 repair that it will need soon, but that I just cannot afford right now. I really, really wish I didn’t have to be dependent on a car.

Wondering… how I am going to focus on work this week! I am such a little kid at heart when it comes to Christmas, and I’m filled with so much joy about what this week will bring.

Feeling… up and down, I guess is the best way to describe it. Some days I am happy and carefree and feeling so blessed with my life, and other days, I am lonely and worn out and wanting to hibernate for a month straight. It’s this strange dichotomy that has me feeling like my emotions are playing Russian roulette on a daily basis.

Sad… about Grandma, about my dad, about the missing pieces in my life.

Grateful… for the beauty of my life. I have so much to be thankful for: a beautiful home, a wonderful roommate, fabulous friends, a loving mother, a supportive brother, adorable nephews, a job I love, and a dog I adore. I have a good life, and it’s easy to forget that when I constantly ponder the “what if’s” and the “should have’s.”

Wishing… that loved ones could make phone calls from Heaven. I’d just like to hear my grandma’s voice again.

What are you currently reading, anticipating, and grateful for?

Loving… NaNoWriMo. I am having such a fun time writing my story. It’s a contemporary romance and my main character has a lot of my characteristics, so that’s fun to write about. I love NaNoWriMo for forcing me to do the work. And I’m over halfway to my goal, so there’s no stopping me now.

Reading… A Kiss at Midnight by Eloisa James. It’s a re-telling of Cinderella, and I’m reading it to fulfill the “retelling of a classic story” category for the Book Riot Read Harder Challenge. I don’t think I’ll finish all the categories in this challenge (I won’t complete the microhistory and “novel published before 1850” categories), but I am going to deem this challenge a success anyway. Now I need to figure out a new reading challenge for 2016!

Anticipating… my trip to Universal Studios on Saturday, where I will visit the Wizarding World of Harry Potter for the very first time! I’m going with Roomie and I know we are going to have the best time! I’ve never been to WWoHP (the last time I was at Universal, I hadn’t even read the books yet!), so I can’t wait to experience the magic. I want to reread the series next year, and I think this will give me the inspiration to do so.

Planning… to participate in The Holiday Council 2015. This will be my fourth or fifth year doing this program, and it’s one of my favorite end-of-year traditions. Reflecting on the past year and setting intentions for the upcoming year is my jam, and I can’t wait for another three weeks of magic with Molly. 🙂

Wanting… an essential oils diffuser because I think it might help the congestion I’m still dealing with at night. I put it on my Christmas list and hinted to my mom and brother that I would really, really like that. We’ll see what’s under the tree on Christmas morning!

Thinking about… taking a break from social media for a little while. I understand why, but my feeds have gotten a wee bit too political lately. I’ve been getting lost in Facebook debates (not participating, just reading them) and there is just so much shaming that is happening, which makes me sad. A little time away never hurt anyone!

Wondering… how different Thanksgiving will feel this year without Grandma. I love Thanksgiving, so there’s a part of me that’s really looking forward to the holiday, but I’m also dreading how emotional the day will be.

Excited about… my next cruise – March 2016! My mom, stepdad, Roomie, and I are all going. It’ll be Roomie’s first cruise and I am so excited for her to experience it. It’ll be a quick cruise – just a 4-day one out of Tampa – but I am already counting down the days.

Celebrating… turning 28 in a matter of days! Ten days to be exact. I am feeling very good about 28. I feel weird to turn that age because I still feel like a kid, and I haven’t hit the milestones I thought I would have hit by now, but I feel like I am coming into my own. I’ve grown so much in this past year and have gone through certain deep valleys that I’ve emerged from knowing myself and what I want and need so much better. Here’s to a new age!

Grateful… for the love and support I’ve received from the blogging community in recent weeks. I always knew this community was an amazingly loving place – it’s been the one place where I feel like I can fully be myself and feel accepted – but I’ve been blown away. The cards, the emails, the care packages. It means so much to me, and I don’t know how to adequately convey my appreciation. Just… thank you. And I will pay it forward.

What are you currently reading, excited about, and grateful for?

Feeling… little bouts of anxiety here and there. I’m still not fully myself, but I’m getting there. Little by little, this new life will start feeling less scary.

Reading… Americanah by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie. At 477 pages, this one is going to take me a while.

Happy… that my grandma is recovering well from her surgery on Thursday. I was so glad to see her on Saturday and am hoping that her tests today go well and she can finally start eating actual food. (Because she lost a lung, there’s a chance she could aspirate when swallowing, so she’s been on an NPO diet (i.e., she cannot eat or drink anything orally). She’s been getting potassium and sugar through an IV, but can’t even have a sip of water! Poor lady.

Listening to… some new podcasts, including Magic Lessons, Real Talk Radio, and Hidden Brain.

Anticipating… my hair appointment on Friday. Hair appointments make me so happy. They are relaxing and I always leave with cute hair. Yay!

Watching… all of my favorite TV shows! I love premiere season. Some new ones I’m trying: Life in Pieces, Quantico, Scream Queens, The Grinder, and Code Black.

Planning… some goals to accomplish in the last quarter of 2015. I can’t believe we’re nearing the end of this year! I have enjoyed this year, but I want to end it with a bang – so I’m setting some big goals to accomplish.

Wondering… if my stuffy nose has anything to do with my acid reflux. I was on 40 mg of generic Prilosec for 30 days, and after 30 days, I bumped down to 20 mg (per doctor’s orders). But then I wound up with a stuffy nose. It feels suspiciously how I felt when I had a sore throat for a month (no symptoms, hurt the most when I woke up, etc.) I couldn’t find much information on my theory, but I bumped myself back up to 40 mg yesterday and… no stuffy nose. Coincidence? I don’t know, but I’m going to continue and see what happens.

Waiting… for my new iPhone to arrive! I’ve been hemming and hawing over getting a new phone, but finally decided to bite the bullet and do it. I’ve had this current phone for over two years now and for something I use as much as I use my phone, a new one is just a good idea. I can’t wait for it to arrive!

Frustrated… by my lack of motivation when it comes to healthy eating and exercise. I know part of it is due to feeling sad and dealing with anxiety and panic attacks, and I’ve just been trying to take it easy and get lots of sleep. But I also know that eating better and exercising will only help my anxiety and get me on the path to feeling better. Must try harder!

Loving… kind people checking in on me, Dr. Pepper, a new beautiful pool to enjoy, Football Sundays, and salted caramel mochas.

What are you currently reading, anticipating, and frustrated by?

Feeling… a lot less stressed than I was last week. Last week, I was feeling very overwhelmed and I thought it was due to knowing my mom would be away for more than a week, but I think it had more to do with the wedding and making sure everything went perfectly for my mom. (Not that she was putting any pressure on me… it was my own perfectionist tendencies, I guess!) Once the wedding was over, I felt all my anxiety go away, and have been feeling very good this week! Three cheers to that!

Reading… What Alice Forgot by Liane Moriarty. It’s a ridiculously long novel, nearly 500 pages, so it’s slow going. I love Moriarty’s novels, but I do wish they weren’t so long! I think this book will end up being my least favorite of hers, but it’s still pretty good.

Watching… The League! I had a friend implore me to start watching this since I’ve been in my own fantasy football league for a few years now and she thought I would relate to it. And I love it! I’m halfway through season 2, and it can be a bit crass and silly, but it’s fun and lighthearted and just what I need right now.

Anticipating… seeing Joe Machi this weekend. I followed his journey on Last Comic Standing last year, and I was hoping he would win. I’m going with some girlfriends and I just can’t wait!

Listening to… a slew of new podcasts. I need to do a follow-up post to my post on my favorite podcasts because I have added so many more shows to my feed (I listen to around 27!) and my favorites have definitely changed. My most recent favorite is been The Shepod.

Planning… on trying out You Need a Budget. I loved San’s full review of the software, and it sounds like something that could be super useful to me. I hate talking about it, but I am not the best manager of my money and I really want to get better. I haven’t had much success using sites like Mint.com, but hopefully, YNAB will be different!

Wondering… what life is going to be like in a month or two. It’s hard to fathom how much my life is going to change when I finally move out. I can be very dependent on my mom, but I’m also very independent at the same time. Which probably doesn’t make sense. I’m worried about how my anxiety will be affected by the move, but I’m also really, really ready to shake up my life and make a big change.

Grateful… for my grandma. I learned last week that my grandma is 1 in 7. What does that mean? Well, stage IV colon cancer patients have a 1 in 7 chance of living past five years. My grandma was diagnosed in 2008. And though the cancer has returned three times since her initial diagnosis, she’s managed to kick its butt each time. This time around has been much more difficult on her, but the lady is a fighter. She’s incredible.

Wanting… a new bed. I was hoping to buy a new bed before my move, but it probably won’t happen. But this is a purchase I want to make very soon! I want to go to an actual furniture store (not IKEA!) and buy an actual adult bed and an actual adult mattress. No more hand-me-downs!

Loving… fresh flowers at home, tiny ice cream cones, the Colorfy app, group texts with my coworkers, snuggles with Dutch, and rainy afternoons.

What are you currently reading, anticipating, and grateful for?