Best Of – Page 13

Categories: Best Of

Best of 2015 | Blog Posts

By the end of 2015, I will have written 133 blog posts. One hundred and thirty-three times this year, I sat down and poured my heart out to this little blog. Some of my posts were silly updates about my life, things that don’t seem to mean much but still mean a lot to me. Some of the posts were vulnerable and gritty and hard to push publish on. I wrote the post I never dreamed I would have to write, saying goodbye to the most special woman in my life. I wrote honestly about dating, even though that’s a subject I hate to talk about. I spent two weeks reliving a fantastic vacation, another week writing about my day-to-day life, and yet another week detailing the bests of my 2015.

This blog is such a piece of me, but it’s not my brand. It’s not who I am. I will never make money off my blog, and I am fine with that. I won’t litter up my sidebar with ads or my posts with affiliate links. That’s not me and that’s not why I blog. It’s okay if it is for you, but I long for the days when blogging was less about Pinterest graphics and brands and more about honesty and vulnerability.

It’s an age-old refrain, I know. The good news is, there are still many of us personal bloggers out there. Bloggers who are pouring their hearts out and giving us a glimpse inside their lives. My blog has always been a vulnerable place, which is why I keep rather quiet about it to people I know IRL. Blogging for me has always been about opening my heart and allowing others to see the triumphs and the struggles.

I hope to continue that throughout 2016 and for however long I plan to blog. (I have no intention of stopping at any point in time.)

So, that’s a super long introduction to my next “Best of 2015” post, which is about some of my favorite blog posts I’ve written this year. Enjoy!

1. My favorite post was Life Lessons from My Grandma.
“My grandma taught me a lot – about life, about love, about what it means to be a good person. She was one of the best humans on this earth. She was giving, kind, compassionate. Even when she was at her sickest, she never faltered in her positivity and tenacious spirit. I wouldn’t be the woman I am today if it wasn’t for my grandma.”

2. My most popular post was I’m 27 and Scared to Move Out.
“In many ways, I feel incredibly silly for being 27 years old and having so many fears about moving to my own apartment. I am well past the stage of life where it’s deemed acceptable to be living with your parents.”

3. My most helpful post was… My Favorite Podcasts.
“As I’ve mentioned before, I am a voracious listener of podcasts. I started listening around February or March of last year, and it’s an obsession. Currently, I have 26 shows that I am subscribed to and I can only see that list growing and growing. I wanted to take the time to recommend some of my favorites to you guys, just in case you a) want to start listening to more podcasts but aren’t sure where to begin, or b) are as obsessive about podcasts as me and want more shows to add to your feed.”

4. A post whose success surprised me was The Guilt of Contentment.
“And even though I’m happy and I feel fulfilled and content… there is guilt. There is worry that if I stay content and happy in my singleness, then I’ll grow comfortable and complacent and not ever try to move on to the next season of my life. That I’m wasting my most precious years, holding tight to my singleness.”

5. A post I feel didn’t get the attention it deserved was… What’s the Point of Healthy Living?
“The crux of a healthy living journey begins when we start taking a good, long, hard look at ourselves and discover that the way we treat ourselves, the way we talk about ourselves, and the way we believe our worth has more to do with the number on the scale than who we are inside is where it all begins.”

6. My most beautiful post was… For My Grandma.
“I process my emotions best through writing, so I wrote the below poem that I tearfully read at her funeral yesterday. On Friday before she passed, as we all gathered in her hospital room, my grandpa asked if we could talk about the qualities Grandma had that we loved best. I took the qualities listed, along with other qualities, to write this poem.”

7. The post I was most scared to push publish on was… The Struggle of Acceptance.
“I’m afraid of missing out. I’m afraid of not living my life by the mantra “YOLO!” I’m afraid of wasting my time, of not measuring up to my version of success, of not measuring up to other’s versions of success. I’m afraid of not being special, not being important, not being necessary. I’m afraid of dying and I’m afraid of living.”

8. The post I am most proud of was… Change, Triggers, and Finding My Way.
“But you can’t know how much you will struggle, how hard it will be, how intense the feelings will feel, until you are in it. Until you are living through the anxiety and the fear.”

Categories: Best Of

Best of 2015 | A Month-by-Month Overview

Hello, friends! I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas – I know I certainly did. I celebrated the holiday with a candlelight service at a local church, a sleepover at my mom’s, and opening presents with her in the early morning. Later on in the day, my brother and his family came over to open more presents and then I helped my mom host dinner for our extended family. It was a busy day, but one that was so full of love and family.

Today, I want to continue my “Best of 2015” series by reviewing the year on a month-by-month overview. Putting this review together helped me to put this year in perspective. While I’ll never qualify 2015 as a good year due to the loss I endured, I was happy to see that the year was filled with more happy emotions than sad ones. I can only hope 2016 holds that same promise.

In January, I was conflicted.

I was in a relationship that I didn’t want to be in, but I wasn’t sure why I was resisting when he was a great guy and we had fun together. The heart knows, though. My heart knew. By the end of the month, we would break up and I would feel nothing but utter relief.

In February, I was overjoyed.

Being single again felt right and true and exactly where I needed to be. I felt like me again, after two months of feeling disconnected from myself. This, in turn, led to a lot of questioning on my end (why am I more happy single? can I ever function in a relationship?), and I’m still trying to sort these questions out. Towards the end of February, my nephew Dominic was born and oh, what a chunky little nugget he was.

In March, I was blissful.

I returned to Savannah, one of my most favorite cities, for a short weekend trip with my mom. We ran a 5k while we were there, and I was just so, so happy to be back, walking through the historic squares and along the Riverfront. Savannah is home to me.

In April, I was social.

April helped me to realize what happens when you get off the couch and start investing in people. During this month, I was a bit of a social butterfly for me. There were afternoons of apartment hunting with my now-Roomie, an afternoon spent at Downtown Disney with Emilie and her fiance, brunch book club, family game nights, and some girls’ nights out. This month, I just felt really good about the place I was at in my life.

In May, I was delighted.

May was the month of my cruise and I had such a wonderful time – even if I did end it with a sprained ankle. It was lovely to have one-on-one time with my mom, exploring and relaxing and eating. We stopped in the Bahamas, St. Thomas, Puerto Rico, and Grand Turk. There’s no better vacation for me than a cruise and a seven-day one is simply the best.

In June, I was engaged.

June was the month of wedding planning. I helped my mom with engagement pictures, wedding invitations, securing a ceremony location, designing a reception menu, and all the other decorative touches. I also helped my mom’s coworkers surprise my mom with a bridal shower, which was probably one of the best moments of my year. It was a busy month of planning and designing and imagining.

In July, I was lit up.

My mom re-married in July. The wedding was simple, but it was perfect. We had no mishaps and I somehow managed to coordinate the whole thing without losing my mind. Actually, it was really fun to be the so-called “coordinator.” It was a lot of work, but god, it was so much fun, too. I loved being in charge! Lit up – there’s no better way to describe July.

In August, I was restful.

I took a break from blogging and social media in August, and it was exactly what I needed. I slowed down my life, spent a lot of time reading and being quiet and still. A quiet pace of life is so helpful for me. It keeps me centered and sane and feeling most like myself.

In September, I was afraid.

I moved in September. I moved to a new city that felt so different from where I used to live. I moved in with a roommate and away from my mom. And it was so damn hard. It was such a huge shakeup to my life and I lived in fear for weeks following the move. There were many panic attacks, and there was an afternoon when the panic was so bad that I had to leave work. I cried a lot. Withdrew from people. And felt so much shame about my anxiety. September, oh, it was a hard month but I had no idea how much harder life was about to get.

In October, I was heartbroken.

I lost my grandma in October. Her loss was the most awful thing I’ve ever been through – the finality of death is so crushing – but if there was any way for someone so beloved to go, it was this way. She was surrounded by her family and friends, and she went peacefully and without any pain. I never expected to lose her this year and I can’t say I’ve been grieving well. (Just thinking about never seeing her again is so crushing that I just… don’t.) I spent a lot of time with my mom this month, being there for her and trying to help in any way I can. I’m still not sure how to move through this life without Grandma, but I’m going to try to make her proud.

In November, I was focused.

I spent the month in a haze of writing, trying to win NaNoWriMo (writing 50,000 words in one month). It’s interesting to me how some years I cannot stay focused to win NaNoWriMo and then other years, it comes so effortlessly to me. This year, it was effortless and I am so proud of myself for putting in the work.

In December, I was settled.

December was the month when I finally felt like Tampa and my new life here fit. I began to establish my own routines and figure out what I wanted my life to look like. I spent a lot of this month doing a lot of soul-searching as I reflected on the past year and made plans for what I want to achieve in the upcoming one. I felt more at ease, less fearful, happier. It’s a wonderful note to end the year on, if I do say so myself.

What are some of the emotions you experienced in 2015?

Categories: Best Of

Best of 2015 | An End-of-Year Survey

It was nearly a year ago when Kathleen posted this end-of-year survey on her blog and I loved it so much that I favorited it and prayed I would remember to go back to it at the end of 2015. And here we are! I love wrapping up the year with a bunch of “Best of…” posts, and I am sure this survey will be a regular sighting from here on out. It was really fun to look back on my year in answering these questions. I’d love to see other people complete this on their blogs, so steal away! (I’ve changed some of the questions because they didn’t apply to my life. Just FYI.)

1) What did you do in 2015 that you’ve never done before?

Went on vacation with a boy. Ran a 5k in a different state. Drove a motorboat. Moved out to my own apartment. Rented a car for a weekend.

2) Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

I made seven resolutions and ended up completing three of them. Not fabulous, but I’m happy with that progress. I will definitely make resolutions for 2016 and cannot wait to share them on the blog soon!

3) Did anyone close to you give birth?

My sister-in-law did! My second nephew was born February 21. 🙂

4) Did anyone close to you die?

My grandma did. It was shocking, horrific, and terrible. But she’s pain-free for the first time in 8 years, surfing the clouds in Heaven and having a grand old time.

5) What places did you visit?

I did a good amount of traveling this year! I visited St. Augustine, Savannah, the Bahamas, Grand Turk, Puerto Rico, and St. Thomas. (Of course, those last four occurred on one cruise, alas!)

6) What would you like to have in 2016 that you didn’t have in 2015?

A partner who makes me feel good. A completed novel. Emergency savings. A smaller size in clothes.

7) What dates from 2015 will be etched on your memory, and why?

February 21 – the day my nephew was born
July 11 – the day my mom remarried
October 9 – the day we lost grandma

8) What was your biggest achievement this year?

Moving to my own place! I was more than ready for this change and I feel better about myself and my life for finally taking the plunge.

9) What was your biggest failure?

Probably not losing weight. My biggest failure every year. I’m getting tired of it.

10) Did you suffer from illness or injury?

I sprained my ankle while on vacation, which was painful and annoying. And dealt with constant congestion since I moved to Tampa in September. (Am I allergic to Tampa?!)

11) What was the best thing you bought?

It’s a toss-up between my TV or my phone. Both have brought me great joy this year.

12) Where did most of your money go?

Probably all the move-in fees I had to pay for my new apartment. And all the new stuff I bought for said new apartment.

13) What did you get really, really, really excited about?

The cruise I took in May! And moving out, though while I anticipated the move, I had a hard time adjusting to the realness of being in a new place.

14) What song will always remind you of 2015?

I don’t listen to music all that much, but probably “I Can Only Imagine” by MercyMe because this is the song we played at my grandma’s funeral. I bawled during the whole song – how could you not? – and this song has so much more meaning to me now.

On a lighter note, I also fell in love with “Here” by Alessia Cara, which is a song that I can’t not sing along to.

15) Compared to this time last year, are you a) happier or sadder, b) thinner or fatter, c) richer or poorer?

I was happier because I was in a new relationship that was exciting, but burned out quickly after the new year. So that’s a tough one to compare to.

I was a wee bit thinner, but not by much.

I was poorer. Woo for having a little bit mo’ money this year.

16) What do you wish you’d done more of?

Saving money. Writing fiction. Therapy.

17) What do you wish you’d done less of?

Spending money. Watching TV. Worrying. Eating?

18) How did you spend Christmas?

I will spend it at home with my family! My mom and I will open presents early in the morning, and then my brother and his family will come over for more present unwrapping. And then my whole extended family will come over for Christmas dinner later in the afternoon. A full day indeed!

19) What was your favorite TV program?

Probably Big Brother. And maybe How to Get Away with Murder – love that show!

20) What was the best book you read?

The Martian by Andy Weir.

21) What was your greatest food discovery?

I’m not exactly sure. I’m not a huge foodie, so I tend to stick to my boring favorites. The only thing that comes to mind is how much I love pepper jack string cheese, so I guess that shows you how adventurous I am when it comes to food.

24) What did you want and get?

My biggest goal for 2015 was to move to a place of my own, which is something I did and I am so glad I marked that task off my list.

25) What did you want and not get?

Romance, a completed novel, financial freedom, more vacations.

26) What was your favorite film of 2015?

I didn’t see too many movies in 2015, but I think the one that had the biggest impact on me was American Sniper. What a movie that was.

27) What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

I turned 28 on my birthday this year, and I celebrated with dinner at my favorite steakhouse with my mom, my brother, and my nephew. Afterward, we went to my mom’s new apartment to have cake and ice cream.

28) What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

I think I would be a little more satisfied with this year if I had lost the weight I wanted to lose. Or maybe if I didn’t feel so financially insecure.

29) How would you describe your personal fashion concept of 2015?

Comfortable? I’m still trying to figure out my personal fashion concept honestly.

30) What kept you sane?

My mom.

31) Who did you miss?

My grandma. I really, really miss my grandma.

There were also moments after I moved out that I missed my mom a ton. Living with her was honestly the best experience, and there’s a lot of sadness at closing that chapter in my life.

32) Who was the best new person you met?

I don’t know! I met some new people – coworkers, friends of friends, etc. – but nobody sticks out in my mind on having a significant impact on my world in 2015. I need to get out more!

33) Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2015.

I learned that in a time of need, my family bands together fiercely. We may be dysfunctional, but we come together when it counts. As terrible as my grandma’s last days were, I’ll carry fond memories of going out to lunch with my big family during that week, reminiscing and chatting and laughing and remembering that what Grandma would want most was all of us enjoying each other’s company.

Other than that, I also learned to respect my anxiety triggers and not beat myself up for them. Anxiety is a liar that says you are the only one experiencing the bad shit you’re going through. It told me that I was a baby for having trouble living on my own, but that’s not true at all because here I am three months later and I love my new life and my new home. I just needed more time than the “normal” person to get used to the change.

34) Show us one of your favorite photos from the year.

This one is easy. The below photo is of my grandparents, my mom, and my stepdad on my mom and stepdad’s wedding day. This ended up being the last event my grandma went to, though none of us had any clue it would be. Grandma had just finished a chemo treatment right before the wedding and she was weak, but she powered through. She even came to lunch afterward and stayed for a long time. I know she couldn’t have been feeling great, but she handled it with nary a complaint. That’s just the epitome of Grandma.

What did you do in 2015 that you’ve never done before? What was your biggest achievement this year?

Categories: Best Of

Best of 2014 | Blog Posts

And it’s 2015! It’s blowing my mind that we’re already two days into a brand-new year. Usually by now, I’ve figured out my word for the year and have set my yearly goals, but I’ve done neither, so I’m feeling a bit unprepared for this year. But no matter – I will figure them out and I’m really excited about what awaits me in 2015. I believe it will be an exceptional year!

Today, I’m finishing up my “Best of 2015” posts with a look back on some of the blog posts I wrote this past year that I loved. It’s always been easier for me to open up, be vulnerable, and talk about how I’m feeling on my blog than I do in person, which is why I’m always so hesitant to talk about my blog to people in my real-life world. My blog is a piece of my heart, and I’m so thankful for those who have been along for the ride. I can’t wait to continue opening up throughout this next year. Blogging is therapy for me, so thank you for allowing me to share myself so freely.

Mushiness aside, here are some of my favorite posts from this past year:

1. My favorite post was On Being a Highly Sensitive Person. “I’ve always known that I’m super duper sensitive in terms of getting my feelings hurt too often and worrying too much about what people think of me. Criticism and sometimes even joking around at my expense is something I take personally. But someone with a highly sensitive nature is not just someone who is “too sensitive” and needs to “lighten up.” It goes much, much deeper than that. It’s actually a genetic trait!”

2. My most popular post (with over 1,200 views!) was On Being a Socially Anxious Introvert. “I wanted to be a star. I wanted to exude confidence and friendliness and openness. I wanted to be that girl who had no problem making friends, who could easily chat it up with a stranger on the street, who could enter new situations feeling curious and excited, not terrified and overwhelmed. And I hated, hated, hated that I was not that girl.”

3. My most helpful post was My Favorite Podcasts. “Podcasts are taking over my life! I can’t tell you how many times I say, “Oh, I heard about that on a podcast!” or “I was listening to a podcast and…” I listen to them when I’m getting ready, when I’m walking Dutch, when I’m exercising, when I’m driving, when I’m working, when I’m cooking, when I’m cleaning. They fulfill me.”

4. A post whose success surprised me was Unapologetic. “Everyone says you have to love yourself before you can love another, and I always thought that was a little cheesy and hokey. But maybe loving yourself isn’t so much about standing in front of the mirror and saying, “You are beautiful and funny and nice!” but about being unapologetically yourself.“

5. A post I feel didn’t get the attention it deserved was My Very Best Job Searching Tips. “Job searching can be dreadfully mundane, heartbreaking, and exhilarating. Whether it’s submitting resume after resume after resume, losing out on a great job, or getting a good lead on your dream job, it’s a roller coaster ride, for sure.”

6. My most beautiful post was On Dating. “Dating can be really fun. And exciting. And thrilling. It can make you fall asleep with a silly smile on your face and wake up with that same silly smile plastered, just from the thought of talking to him again. It can give you those delicious butterflies you feel deep in the pit of your belly as your phone dings with a text or you’re walking up to meet him for a date.”

7. The post I was most scared to push publish on was On Frugal Living. “Being frugal is not very fun, it’s not very sexy, it’s not very exciting. It’s boring. It’s saying no to plans with friends and turning away from the cute clothes at Target during my toiletries run and choosing my boring home-cooked meals over delicious take-out.”

8. The post I am most proud of was One Year of Writing Professionally. “There are days where the writing comes easily, and I’m knocking pages off my to-do list left and right. And then there are days when it feels like I forgot how to put words together to form a sentence. Nothing works and it can take me upwards of an hour to write a single 250-word page. As someone who is pretty high-strung and anxiety-prone, I can get myself worked up over these days, worrying that I will never, ever be able to write again and why am I even here I am terrible at this why did they hire me oh my god what if I am fooling everyone?! It’s fun being in my brain sometimes. Good writing days happen. Bad writing days happen. It’s nothing to get in a tizzy about!”

Categories: Best Of

Best of 2014 | Reading Stats

For the past three years, at the end of the year, I’ve sat down and come up with a list of the top ten books I read over the past year. This year, instead of doing that, I thought it might be more interesting to detail some of my reading stats for the year. I had a pretty great reading year, blowing past my goal to read 75 books, and I read some phenomenal titles. Let’s take a look back on 2014 in reading, shall we?

Total books read: 81
Most books read in one month: July and August (9)
Least books read in one month: December (3)
Male authors read: 6
Female authors read: 48
Books set in other countries: 15
Books written by non-white authors: 4

So, a solid year of reading with 81 books completed. I’m pretty happy with that number! But one thing I’m realizing is how much I need to diversify my reading selections – only 6 male authors and 4 non-white authors read. This was super enlightening for me, but I have a good plan for diversifying my reading selections for 2015 that I talk about below!

By Genre

Romance: 28
Chick lit: 23
Fiction: 12
YA fiction: 8
Non-fiction: 4
Memoir: 3
Historical fiction: 2
Middle-grade fiction: 1

No surprise here – I read a ton of romance and chick lit. These are my favorite genres to read because they’re light-hearted and make me feel good. As much as I want to diversify my reading, my selections will probably always fall heavily on the romance/chick-lit side of things.

Book Club

I read 11 books this year with my book club. We pick a lot of light reads because that’s what we love to read, but there were some heavier picks. This year, we read:

January – The Rosie Project (4 stars)
February – The Husband’s Secret (5 stars)
March – The Girl You Left Behind (3 stars)
April – The Storyteller (4 stars)
May – The Interestings (3 stars)
June – The Edge of Normal (5 stars)
July – The Book of Bright Ideas (4.5 stars)
August – Code Name Verity (3 stars)
September – The Silent Wife (3 stars)
October – Ugly Love (5 stars)
November – Amy & Roger’s Epic Detour (4 stars)
December – A House in the Sky (did not read)

Other Fun Stats

Book with most pages: In Her Shoes by Jennifer Weiner (560 pages)
Book with least pages: Girl, Interrupted by Susanna Kaysen and Charlotte’s Web by E.B. White (192 pages)
Book that did not live up to the hype: To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before by Jenny Han
Book I think everybody should read: The Five People You Meet in Heaven by Mitch Albom

My Top Five Books

Two Kisses for Maddy by Matthew Logelin – This book affected me sooooo much. I almost don’t want to include it on my list because it put me in a funk for weeks after I read it. But I think that’s why I have to include it. This book touched me deeply, even though the subject matter was utterly heart-wrenching and depressing. It’s not a book for the faint of heart, but Matthew’s writing is so raw and gutting that I’m glad I read his story.
The Willpower Instinct by Kelly McGonigal – I wrote an entire post on my thoughts on the book, even though I could have probably written three or four more posts on how this book affected me. (I had Many Thoughts!) This book was such an interesting read, though, and I highly recommend it to anyone.
The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini – Hosseini can do no wrong, in my opinion. His books are so engaging, even if they aren’t the type of books I’d normally pick up. I’m never disappointed by him!
Eleanor & Park by Rainbow Rowell – I’m so glad I discovered Rainbow Rowell this year. Her books make me so happy. This was the first novel of hers I read, and I’m so glad I started with this one. I read the majority of this book in one afternoon because I couldn’t put it down for anything.
The Five People You Meet in Heaven by Mitch Albom – If you haven’t read this book yet, just stop everything you’re doing, go buy the book, and read it. Please. It is such a great read, and it gave me all of the happy feels.

Final Thoughts & 2015 Goals

So, I’m pretty happy with my reading accomplishments this year! I didn’t read nearly as many books this year as I did last year, but 102 books read in one year is fairly nuts and I don’t think I’ll ever come close to that number again. Which I’m fine with – quality over quantity, right? I’d rather read fewer books that really speak to me, than many books that I rush through just to say I’ve read them. But still – 81 books is a huge number! I’m proud of that number. I’m proud I still made time to read, and that I read some phenomenal books that stuck with me for a long time.

In 2015, I’m lowering the total number of books I want to read because I really want to be more intentional about what I read. I’m still planning to read my romance novels and fun chick-lit books, but I decided to take on the Book Riot Read Harder Challenge. I’ve already started perusing book lists and making a category on my Goodreads page of the books I might read to fulfill all the different challenges posed, and I’m excited to diversify my reading selections this year. Some of the best books I’ve read in my life are because I took a chance on a book that wasn’t in my reading comfort zone, and I’m hoping to find more favorite reads thanks to this challenge.

How many books did you read in 2014? Have you set any reading goals for 2015?