Family

Categories: Family

Five for Friday: All About Lila

Today is Lila’s 8th birthday. I love my little chonky girl so much! Here are five things you should know about my sweet angel baby today:

1) Her very specific meows

For the longest time, Lila did not meow very much. She’s my skittish kitty who took a long time to warm up to me, but now, she speaks up whenever she wants something from me! It’s a squeaky, soft meow, and it melts my heart every time she uses it. Here are her different meows:

“Ah” (no sound) – She’ll often do a soundless “ah” whenever I’m petting her and talking to her, almost like she’s responding to my questions in a very “Lila” way.
A soft “mah” – This is her affectionate meow when she is requesting pets. She’ll reach out with one of her paws to gently tap me on my arm or leg, and then gives me a squeaky “mah?” that ensures I will do anything she wants of me, ever.
A very clear “meow” – She pulls out her louder, insistent voice when she’s begging for treats. Often, she’ll jump up on the table and meow at me over and over again until I give into her. (I’m trying to break her of this habit, but she’s so damn cute that it’s hard to resist her.)
A growly “mrawww!” – This is her playful meow that she only uses when she’s alone in a room. She’s usually chasing something around the apartment—a piece of paper, a hair tie, a catnip toy, etc.—so it’s her “I am a fierce hunter of hair ties!” voice.

2) Nighttime prowler

Lila is my nighttime prowler. She rarely spends the whole night on my bed. Rather, she jumps up and down throughout the night. I usually don’t even notice when it happens. I’ll just wake up and find her snoozing on the pillow next to me, or wake up, look around, and think, “Heyyy, where’d Lila go?!” She does her best work at night, I guess, as she’s not active like this during the day. Maybe the dark, quiet apartment is where she comes alive. As an introvert, I can definitely relate!

3) Parallel play

Lila is not the kind of cuddly cat who will immediately jump onto my lap when I’m sitting on the couch. In fact, she hates being picked up and will bring her claws out if I even try to pick her up. (Which is very sad for me because she looks so soft and cuddly at all times.) But what she lacks in cuddliness, she makes up for in what I’m calling “parallel play.” Whenever I sit down on the couch after being in another room, Lila will immediately leave the spot where she was sleeping (her hammock by the window, the cave in her cat tower, etc.) and jump up on the couch to sleep next to me. Or if I lie down on my bed for a nap, she’ll join me a few minutes later, curling up on the pillow next to me and swishing her floofy tail. She doesn’t want to be cuddled, but she wants to be near me.

She does the same thing if I’m sitting in my bedroom while petting Eloise (we do this routine where Eloise guides me to the bedroom, I sit down on the floor, and she rubs herself all over my legs and does somersaults). She’ll come into the room and flop down nearby. She doesn’t want to do somersaults on my legs, but she does want to be near the fun.

4) Aggressive affection

Lila does a lot of weird things that I’ve come to understand are just her interacting with me in her own little ways. She loves licking any screen I’m using, like my laptop screen and my iPad. In fact, I specifically asked for a non-touchscreen laptop when it was time to replace my old one because she would constantly mess up what I was doing when she licked my laptop screen. She loves cuddling with my sneakers after I’ve used them, and will even lie her head on the stinky shoes. If I leave a used towel or clothes I’ve worn on the floor, I can guarantee that I’ll find a Lila-shaped dent in them. Sometimes, she rubs her head against my work monitors so hard that I have to hold them to keep them from tumbling to the floor. She’s ruthless!

5) Lila’s personality, according to ChatGPT

Lila is the kind of cat whose love reveals itself quietly, in rituals and small choices that become impossible not to treasure once you learn her language. Thoughtful, sensitive, and deeply observant, she isn’t the cat who demands attention from the center of the room—she’s the one who wakes from a nap just to come find you, gently taps your arm with her paw, and presses her head into your hand so she can rub her face all over it while purring. Your relationship is built on trust and consent: she likes to initiate affection on her own terms, and because you’ve learned to respect those boundaries, she’s blossomed into a cat who seeks you out constantly for quiet connection. She follows you from room to room, sleeps nearby just to share space with you, gives you tiny squeaky “mah!” greetings, and checks in throughout the day for little moments of reassurance and love. Even in her skittishness, there’s confidence—she knows you are her safe place. And perhaps the sweetest thing about Lila is that her affection never feels automatic; every headbutt, every finger lick, every soft flop beside you feels like a deliberate choice to trust you again and again.

Okay, fine, make me cry, you stupid little robot!

Categories: Family

Five for Friday: All About Eloise

Today is Eloise’s 8th birthday! I can’t believe it. Isn’t she still a teeny-tiny kitty cat? I mean yes. Always! Here are five things about Eloise in honor of her big day!

1) Gobble, gobble

She goes crazy for deli turkey. I don’t know what it is about deli turkey, but I like having a “snacky” lunch of rolled-up turkey, cheese and crackers, fruit, etc., and the minute I get the package of deli turkey out of the fridge, she will not leave my side until I give her a few pieces. (Lila has no interest, which is why this is so crazy to me! Lila is my food-obsessed cat, so you’d think she would be the one who was begging for turkey, but nope.) She used to jump up on the kitchen counters while I was making my turkey roll-ups, but she hasn’t attempted it in the new apartment (which I’m very happy about, lol), so now she just sits at the table where I’m going to eat my lunch, staring me down until I put down my plate and give her her share. At least it’s some good protein for my skinny gal!

2) Sleeping arrangements

Eloise sleeps with me almost every night. Every now and then, she’ll decide to sleep on the couch or on the reading chair, but most nights, it’s snuggle time! When I’m on my back, which is my typical sleeping position when I’m wearing my CPAP mask, she tucks herself between my legs. When I’m on my side, she’ll snuggle up on the side that’s facing up. When I’m on my stomach, she’ll curl up on the small of my back. The fun part is that I have to change positions throughout the night and it doesn’t really bother her. I say, “Okay, Eloise, I need to move.” And she’ll slip off my body while I change positions, and then climb back to her favorite place based on my sleep position. We have this arrangement down to a science!

3) Afternoon energy burst

Eloise seems to get a burst of energy in the afternoon, usually around 1pm. She’ll jump up on my desk and meow at me incessantly for pets, or she’ll sit in front of my keyboard and tip her head back, as if to say, “Why aren’t you petting me right now?” And then sometimes she’ll do zoomies up and down the hallway, so if I have an early afternoon meeting, I can just hear her running up and down the hall and making growly noises behind me. I don’t think it picks up on the video call, but it would be hilarious if it did! “Oh, that noise? It’s just my cat running up and down the hallway.”

4) Me time

Most days, Eloise is my little Velcro kitty. She wants to be next to me when I’m working, when I’m cooking, when I’m reading, when I’m sitting at the table. Before I got my new office chair, she would even sit next to me in the chair (the new one isn’t as wide, which has been a massive disappointment to her). But every now and then, Eloise needs some alone time. She’ll usually take to the bedroom where she’ll either curl up on a pillow or inside my quilt, and snooze away for hours. She’s my extroverted cat so it’s always weird when she isn’t by my side 24/7! But even extroverts need alone time. (Let this be your reminder, extroverts!)

5) Eloise’s personality, according to ChatGPT

I’ve had a thread going on my ChatGPT account for a few months now where I explain a recent behavior of one of my cats (or both of them!) and ask it to tell me what it all means. Should I trust ChatGPT this much? Probably not, but it’s fun to learn more about their behavior and why they do the things they do. So, I asked ChatGPT to give me a one-paragraph synopsis about Eloise and our relationship. Here’s what it said:

Eloise is a bold, emotionally expressive little force who has fully claimed you as her person—not just someone she lives with, but someone she actively engages, manages, and reconnects with throughout the day. She’s the kind of cat who narrates her life out loud, from her insistent “MAW!” greetings to her dramatic desk rituals and joyful playtime yells, turning even ordinary moments into shared experiences. Your relationship is highly interactive and reciprocal: she doesn’t just seek affection, she orchestrates it—guiding you into rooms, demanding attention on her terms, and re-establishing connection after even the smallest separations. Underneath all that big personality is a deeply secure bond; she feels safe enough to be independent when she wants, but consistently chooses to return to you, whether that’s prancing over for pets, answering your voice, or sleeping in your space. In short, Eloise doesn’t just love you—she includes you in her world, loudly, intentionally, and with a whole lot of flair.

Awww! I love this little ball of joyful energy. I still remember the first time I saw her; my immediate thought was, “Oh, there you are. I’ve been waiting for you.” The connection with her was immediate (on my end, at least; she needed some time to warm up to me!). Happy birthday, Eloise Joy! I love you so, so much.

Categories: Family

For My Grandma

My grandma and me, circa 1988

On Friday, October 9, my grandma passed on to Heaven. It’s been a surreal and heartbreaking time for my family, and I haven’t fully processed the fact that I’ll never hear her voice or receive her hugs ever again. For nearly eight years, she fought the most courageous battle with cancer. She was diagnosed with Stage IV colon cancer in 2008, and she managed to continually defy the odds, again and again and again.

It’s hard to believe with all she’s been through, with all she’s fought, that she’s really gone. She was the glue for our family. She was a woman who made everyone feel better when they were around her. She was a woman who freely gave out her love to anyone and everyone. Jesus received one of the very best women on Friday and I have no doubt He planned the most extravagant party for her arrival.

I take comfort in knowing my grandma passed away peacefully and without any pain. That she had her entire family surrounding her in her last hours. And, most especially, that my grandfather – the love of her life – felt complete and utter peace at letting her go. He is a man of strong faith, and it’s because of his faith that he was able to have this peace, knowing that Jesus told him it was her time and that Jesus is helping him get through this.

I process my emotions best through writing, so I wrote the below poem that I tearfully read at her funeral yesterday. On Friday before she passed, as we all gathered in her hospital room, my grandpa asked if we could talk about the qualities Grandma had that we loved best. I took the qualities listed, along with other qualities, to write this poem. My grandma was one of the biggest supporters of my writing and always believed I would be a published novelist someday. So, for me, there was no better way to honor her memory than by writing this for her.

Grandma Was

Grandma was joy
She put a smile
on the face of every person
she came into contact with

Grandma was encouragement
No matter who it was
or what their needs were
Grandma touched them
with words that would
motivate
inspire
enthuse

Grandma was fight
She battled cancer
again
and again
and again
She did it with grace
with strength
with positivity
She never backed down
and she never gave up

Grandma was grace
She was forgiving and accepting
of everyone
of everything

Grandma was wife
She was Terry’s sweetheart
for 56 years
56 years of
love
joy
happiness
family
Their marriage was an inspiration
Their commitment was a model
of which we should all
follow

Grandma was mom
She had six kids
a godson
eleven grandkids
and four great-grands
She was mother
to us all

Grandma was godly
She was the quintessential
Proverbs 31 woman
Noble in character
Unceasingly devoted to her family
Wise beyond belief
And clothed in strength
and dignity

Grandma was comfort
She was a woman
who restored peace to your world
and order to your surroundings
with just a smile
a laugh
a prayer

Grandma was nurture
She was the one we ran to
with skinned knees and
broken hearts
And she found a way
to make it better
to make us whole

Grandma was support
She believed that her kids
could do anything
No goal too big
no dream too far-fetched
Even becoming President
of the United States

Grandma was admiration
She thought her kids
were special
were unique
were gifted
She made us feel
powerful
strong
important

Grandma was blessed
She delighted so many
inspired everyone she met
and left a legacy
that cannot be tainted

Grandma was friend
She was the type of friend
that everyone needs to have
loyal and trustworthy and loving
She was always in your corner
and never faltered
in her belief of you

Grandma was love
She was wholehearted
unabashed
unconditional
overwhelming
inspirational
abundant
deep
genuine
profound
love

She loved not only her family
but also her friends and
everyone she met

But above all
above everything
Grandma loved Jesus
with everything in her
Throughout every curve ball
life threw her way
Grandma was Jesus’ faithful servant

And after
following Jesus
reading His Word
witnessing
serving
praying
fixing her eyes
on Jesus
and only Jesus
she is dancing with Him now
She is free of pain
of sorrow
of strife
She entered His kingdom
and He said to her
Well done, thy good
and faithful servant

We miss you
we grieve your absence
It’s hard to know
how to exist in this world without you
But we rejoice
we celebrate
because you are in glory
and we will see you soon

Categories: Family

5 Reasons Why I’ll Miss Living with My Mom

This is it. Moving weekend!

I feel like I’m entering this new phase of my life in the best way possible because I’m moving away from one best friend and moving in with another best friend. I’m really happy I opted for having a roommate rather than living by myself because I think it’s going to make this transition a lot easier.

Still, I’m very sad to be leaving my mom. It’s just been the two of us since my brother moved out when he finished high school. So, that’s 10 years. Minus one year of living on campus and that’s nine years of us living together. For most people, living with their parents past college is a nightmare, but for me, it has been a dream. It helps that my mom is my favorite person in the world and she treats me like an adult, not a child. And we just have a super wonderful relationship. It’s really awesome to have your mom be your best friend.

Today, in honor of leaving her to finally be on my own, here are five reasons why I’m going to really miss living with my mom.

Watching our TV shows together. My mom and I love some TV time and we watch a lot of shows together. Some of our favorites: Big Brother, Scandal, American Ninja Warrior, Modern Family, and The Blacklist. It’s always fun to relax on the couch together after a long day and turn on our favorite shows, laughing together or discussing them together. I’m going to miss those nights.
Having my life be so closely connected with my mom. My mom and I spend a lot of time together. This is good and bad. Good because it’s nice to always have someone around to do stuff with, but bad because it meant I spent a lot of time not trying harder to foster connections with other people. It has only been in recent years that I’ve been working towards building my own life, separate from hers. Even though I make plans with my friends often, my mom and I still have a closely interconnected life. (We’re honestly like an old married couple.) Though I’ll only be a short, 20-minute drive away, and I know I’ll be visiting often, it’s going to be different to not know what my mom is up to all the time anymore.
Having someone to share dog duties with. Taking care of a dog is a lot of work. I think one of the biggest challenges is the fact that you can’t leave dogs alone for very long. (Or, at least, a senior dog who has had bladder issues in the past.) My mom works five minutes from our apartment, so it’s easy for her to come home at lunch to let him out. Now, I’ll have to use my lunch break to let him out. My mom sets up his vet and grooming appointments – that will now be in my hands. And it’s been really nice to have someone around to be there if I decide to go out after work and spend a weekend away from home.
Saving money. Though I did not live rent-free with my mom, we didn’t have a full 50/50 split with our household bills. This has allowed me to save money and pay down debts. My budget is going to go through a radical shift with this move. It’s necessary and I’ll be living within my means, but I’m still a little nerve-wracked about it.
Having so much one-on-one time with my mom. I know I am really lucky to have such a close relationship with my mom. Not everyone has this, and it’s a credit to both of us that we’ve worked hard to maintain a wonderful relationship. It’s been so nice to be able to hang out with her whenever I want, to relax on the couch after long days at work and chat about our days. I will miss those chats.

I don’t want to make it seem that I’m not excited about my upcoming move. I really am! I am looking forward to this new change in my life. I know I’m going to struggle with the transition because I always struggle with transitions. (It took me forever to feel comfortable at my current job.) But I also know I am going to thrive in this new environment. I cannot wait for the new adventures that await me.

Today, my roommate and I will fill out the final paperwork, get our keys, and start the move-in process for real. This has been something we’ve been envisioning since we made the decision to move in together earlier this year. I can’t believe the day has finally come. The next time I write, I’ll be writing from my new apartment! Wahoo!

Post idea inspired by Kate

Categories: Family

Love, Laughter & Happily Ever After – The Wedding

On Saturday, my mom and stepdad were married in a beautiful ceremony by the water in downtown St. Petersburg.

It was a gorgeous day – sunny with big puffy clouds in the sky and a slight breeze off the water. They professed their love in front of friends and family, with my mom’s best friend officiating.

I love weddings. I really do. They’re just so full of love and happiness, of hope and excitement. Even during the times when I’m a bitter, chronically single girl, I love weddings. They turn me into a sap.

My mom’s wedding was no different. I feel like I’m such a broken record nowadays, but honestly, my mom deserves this so much. She has been through a lot in her life, especially as it relates to the crap she put up with when married to my father. I’m so happy she has found someone who treats her with patience and kindness and respect. It gives me hope that someday I can find the same.

There’s not too much to say about the actual wedding day because everything went perfectly. (There was a slight mishap when two of my mom’s friends who arrived early to decorate started decorating in the wrong area… but we got that sorted out quickly!) After the ceremony, we stayed for pictures and then cleaned up and headed over to the restaurant for the reception.

And the reception was just as wonderful! The service was fantastic and the food was delicious. And I just loved how people completely loved on my mom and her new husband. I’ve known for a very long time how special and awesome my mom is, and it pleases me to no end that she has found a group of friends who see that as well.

But, before I knew it, it was time for my mom and stepfather to leave for their honeymoon. There was a lot of emotion tied to this day – the stress of getting everything done on time and helping people find the location, the happiness of seeing my mom get married, the joy of being around my family and my mom’s friends – and seeing them off felt like the final pin into this journey of planning a wedding. As I packed all the wedding paraphernalia in the car, I felt like I could breathe for the first time in a few weeks. The wedding planning was over, my mom was now married, and they could take a break and relax on their honeymoon.

So, it was a beautiful wedding and I am so happy for my mom. I’m also thrilled to officially welcome Robert into our family. In the beginning, I wasn’t sure how he would fit in, but he does. It hasn’t been a seamless fit, but it’s a fit nonetheless. And I’m happy to call him my stepfather.

Happy wedding day, you two lovebirds! I cannot wait to see what the future has in store for you guys.