Recurring Series

Five for Friday (v. 85)

1) Student loan forgiveness

I have to start this post with the best news of the week: Biden announcing student loan forgiveness! I have $7,800 left to pay for my undergraduate student loans, which means I am done paying my student loans for-ev-errrrrr. While I haven’t been paying much towards my student loans because of the payment pause and I get a $100 monthly reimbursement from my company to put towards my loans, this is still going to be a huge weight off my shoulders that I don’t have to worry about these dang loans anymore! For me, student loans were the only way I was able to attend college (I also got financial aid and had some scholarships). And that’s true for many, many people like me who didn’t have parents who could pay for their child’s college tuition (and everything else that comes with college life). But then we get out of college with thousands and thousands of dollars in loans we have to pay back, working at jobs that barely pay us enough to live, let alone put hundreds of dollars a month towards paying off our loans. (True story: my salary was $25,000 for the first few years out of college, and this was in 2011-2013!) This news is such a relief to so many of us.

2) A very social week

It has been a very social week for me, which has been great for my loneliness! I had two friend dates on Saturday, lunch with my mom on Monday and then dinner with Bri that evening, and a day at the office on Wednesday where I got to hug a lot of coworkers I haven’t seen since March 2020 and have lunch with two of my fave coworkers! It has done my soul a lot of good to have so much social interaction, even though I really, really wanted to stay home and not go into the office on Wednesday. But I knew I would enjoy being around people, and I did. (Yes, even though I am your classic introvert, I still need social interaction. All people do!) While the loneliness hasn’t quite gone away, I am putting in the effort to ease it and that feels so good.

3) Becoming a mood reader

I’ve been in a weird place with reading lately. It’s not exactly a reading rut; it’s more that I feel very tender emotionally right now, and I’ve been very wary of reading books that feel too dark or hit me in my emotional feels. Maybe it’s time for me to become a mood reader?! I’ve never been one, but I’m starting to understand the appeal. But I need some logistics here: How do you read based on your moods when you’re a library user? Do you just request a whole bunch of books at one time and then pick based on how you’re feeling? I’ve always been someone who reads based on a very strict TBR, but it hasn’t really been working out lately. But I feel very weird about not using a TBR list to set my upcoming reads. Like, who am I without a reading list? Am I just supposed to peruse my shelves and pick up what sounds good at the moment? I feel like I’m free-falling by not having a strict TBR list that sets out my next read!

4) Internet schminternet

I have been having these weird Internet issues, but it only happens to some of my devices. For a while now, my personal laptop hasn’t been able to connect to wifi unless I restart my Internet modem through my Internet provider’s app. My wifi connection works just fine on my work laptop, my TV, and my phone; it was just my personal laptop, leading me to think it was a problem with that laptop (it’s a bit of an older gal). But now, I can’t get my personal laptop to connect to wifi no matter how many times I reset or restart my Internet modem and my wifi connection has stopped working on Kindle. (I was trying to download an e-book to read, please see above, but I couldn’t! Oh, the horror!) I called my Internet provider but even they couldn’t get it to work, so my next step is to have the modem replaced. I’ve had this modem for a while now (6 years) so it’s probably time for an upgrade. Fingers crossed this does the trick!

5) Weekend plans

It’s going to be a fun and busy weekend for me! Today, I have a facial with my favorite esthetician and I’m baking blueberry muffins for book club tomorrow. On Saturday, we’re doing brunch book club at Bri’s house and later, I’m doing my family’s fantasy football draft, which I am very much looking forward to! And on Sunday, Bri and I are meeting to record a few episodes of season two of the podcast! I’m so excited to get back into the podcasting chair with Bri. 🙂

Categories: Recurring Series

Snapshot of My Day | August 21, 2022

It’s been a little while since I did Snapshot of My Day, so I decided to do this yesterday. I haven’t done this exercise on a weekend day, so it was a fun one to document. Post idea and prompts from Torrie!

Time I woke up: 9:30 a.m. Glorious!

First thing I did upon waking: I took the dogs out for a morning pee. (I stayed over at my mom’s this weekend to watch the dogs while my mom and stepdad took a mini-vacation.) Chip enjoyed running around the yard, barking, while Lucy just wanted me to pick her up and let her kiss all over my face. She’s very kissy in the morning!

Today’s weather: Ugh, so hot! The high was 96F and with the heat index, it was easily over 105F today. I hate August in Florida.

Something I spent money on today: Groceries! Such a fun purchase, eh? I opted for grocery delivery, which always makes me feel so lazy (as a single person who can absolutely go to the grocery store on her own; I understand why it’s a godsend for other people!), but I had a lot to restock and I always hate carrying so many bags of groceries up three floors. No thanks!

An out-of-the-ordinary thing that happened today: I woke up at my mom’s house, instead of my apartment! I always stay over at her place when I watch the dogs because my cats would not be too keen to have two rambunctious dachshunds running around and playing with their toys!

Last thing I read (not on the Internet): Home Before Dark by Riley Sager. I’m loving this spooky ghost story!

Last thing I read (on the Internet): One of my e-newsletters. It was Crooked Media’s What a Day newsletter that they send out every evening Mon-Fri.

Last text I sent: “Works for me!” to Bri and Amber. We’re going to have a Zoom date this week to go over our plans for our Labor Day getaway!

Last text I received: A realllllly cute video my mom found of Lucy when she was just a few weeks old. She’s so wee!

Last website I visited: My blog to respond to a comment!

Last show I watched: Big Brother.

Last thing I said: “Bye!” My mom Facetimed me a few minutes ago to chat about a few things.

Last thing I ate: Pizzzzzza. Screamin’ Sicilian’s Holy Pepperoni pizza is my holy grail of frozen pizza these days.

What I was doing an hour ago: I was tidying up my apartment before sitting down to paint my nails.

What I will be doing an hour from now: I will either be reading in bed, trying to finish up the YA romance I’ve been reading this week (no, I will not be reading the spooky ghost story before bed!), or listening to ASMR videos on Youtube while I drift off to sleep.

Current whereabouts of other members of my household: Eloise is curled up on the couch, asleep, and Lila is sitting on my TV stand, staring at the door, which is right next to my TV stand. It’s a little creepy, can’t lie.

One thing I crossed off my to-do list today: I mopped the floors! I love the feeling of freshly mopped floors, but I don’t mop them nearly as much as I should. Ah, well.

Lila hates when I run the Roomba. She hides behind one of my monitors on my desk, and stares at me like this.

Categories: Recurring Series

A Friday Morning Coffee Date

It’s been a while since we’ve had a virtual coffee date, friends! Let’s sit down with a drink—I’m sipping on an iced vanilla latte myself—and chat about what’s going on in our lives.

If we were having coffee today… I’d start the conversation by gushing about my podcast for a little while! I’m having way more fun with it than I thought I would, and it’s been even better to put it out in the world and hear how you guys are enjoying it! We’re starting to plan for season 2 and have a recording date scheduled for next weekend, which I’m very much looking forward to! And we have a creative brainstorming session to figure out some bits and pieces we want to put together for season 2 on Monday. This little passion project really has my whole heart at this point!

If we were having coffee today… I might talk about mental health. My anxiety has been in an up-and-down state these days. Some days, I’m fine. Other days, I’m not. I’m trying to do what I can to keep myself mentally well: taking my meds, going for walks, seeing my therapist, hanging out with friends/family, checking in with my moods, etc. But it’s exhausting to never know how I’m going to feel on a particular day. Or to do something that I think is going to be good for my mental health, but it turns out to cause me more anxiety. And there’s a part of me that doesn’t want to talk about all of this on my blog because oh my god, can I just get it together already? I have this incessant need to “win” my anxiety disorder and when it takes me down, I feel so defeated, as if I wasn’t strong enough to battle it like I should have. I feel as if I am letting other people down when my anxiety isn’t as stable as I want it to be. (Could I be any more of an Enneagram 9? Sigh.) I’m trying to be better about just letting my anxiety disorder be what it is and not be defeated by this up-and-down trajectory of symptoms. Easier said than done.

If we were having coffee today… I’d probably groan about how difficult dating is. Do you know that I was all set up to go on a date with someone and he canceled on me the day of the date? And that the next time I set up a first date with someone different, I logged into my Hinge profile to send a message the morning of the date, only to find out he had unmatched with me? Or that I’ve had four different lengthy and deep conversations through Bumble with women I really liked… only to get ghosted after a few days? Y’all, my self-esteem is not great right now. I feel undateable. I don’t know where to go from here but, oof. This return to dating apps has not been good for me.

If we were having coffee today… I might admit that I got myself in a bit of a pickle financially. I don’t really know how it happened but in the last month alone I’ve had to withdraw money from emergency savings to save myself from overdrafting in my checking account. I’ve mentioned before that I have two separate savings accounts: one is with my bank, and I try to keep $500 in that savings account so that I can quickly transfer money to my checking account if I don’t have enough in there to cover a bill. The other savings account is through CapitalOne, and that’s where I keep my various saving categories: emergency savings, pet savings, Christmas, etc. I built up a nice little nest egg in my emergency savings that I haven’t had to touch, but I got myself into a bit of a jam at the beginning of this month. With only $80 in my bank savings, I didn’t have enough to cover a bill that would be autodrafting from my checking account, so I had to dip into my CapitalOne emergency savings. Ugh! I’ve been doing so good at not living paycheck-to-paycheck, so it’s a bit demoralizing to have this happen. So, until I get my credit card fully paid off, my bank savings back to $500, and my emergency savings back to $3,000, I am on a slight shopping ban. It’s not a full-scale shopping ban because I am going to be here for, ehh, a few months I think. I’m giving myself $30 to spend each pay period. But I’m definitely saying no to any major purchases, unnecessary Ubereats orders, and retail therapy. I know I will feel so much better when everything is back to normal, and September is a three-paycheck month, which should really help!

If we were having coffee today… and I felt really comfortable with you, I might bring up some of the things I’ve been thinking about in regards to weight loss, dieting, and body image. Here’s my truth: I want to lose weight because I am not at a healthy weight and the last time I had bloodwork done, some of the numbers were concerning. For a while, I thought about rejoining WW for the 8th, 9th, 10th, who knows, time. But then I thought about how much I hate counting points, how demoralizing it is to have to restrict when I run out of points (yes, you can eat whatever you want, but you’re still restricting yourself to fit into a certain daily points range) (and also, ugh, I do not love that feeling of needing to exercise to “earn” extra points – NO). I just don’t have it in me to do that to myself again. I do believe that WW can work for many people; I’m just not one of them. I’m considering Noom, but I also don’t really love the idea of grading my food on a scale of good, neutral, and bad, because I don’t believe food is inherently good or inherently bad. I am most definitely not going to redownload My Fitness Pal and track every calorie I eat because that just leads me down a negative path. So what’s a girl with eating issues to do? I don’t have a solution here. I might end up trying Noom, especially because they keep sending me emails about getting 6 months free with a one-year subscription. Or maybe I just need to find small ways to add healthier foods into my diet. For example, I switched my breakfast from eggs and toast to string cheese and Greek yogurt. Instead of having a ton of different chocolates and Little Debbie snacks around, I have one bag of dark chocolates. I don’t love dark chocolate and can only eat a few at a time since it’s so rich, so it gives me the chocolate fix without tempting me too much. Is it enough? I don’t know. But I know I need to get serious about what I’m putting into my body because there’s nothing I want less than heart disease and diabetes.

If we were having coffee today… I would, of course, give you an update on the cats. My little ladies are doing great! Eloise has been loving my new habit of making my bed every morning, as I find her curled up on the bed all morning long. (However, she seems to take issue with the process of me making my bed, as she swipes at me with her claws while I’m doing it. I’m not a fan!) She’s also still demanding that I share the office chair with her while I’m working. She’ll stand on the arm of the chair until I move over to let her curl up next to me. I let her do it because I love the closeness! Lila has always been my shy, skittish kitty who hides under the couch when company is over. But she is so open, snuggly, and lovey with me. She lets me snuggle her close to my side in the morning when I’m in bed and has even started curling up next to me on the couch when I’m watching TV. That’s a new habit for her, as she used to be very particular about where she would sleep and didn’t want to be too close to me. She also loves licking the inside of my elbow, which isn’t always the most pleasant feeling with her rough tongue on such sensitive skin! But I let her do it because I’m a sucker and her cute lil face is hard to resist.

Whew! This turned into a very serious coffee date. Thanks for listening to me! Tell me what you would talk to me about on this coffee date. 🙂

Categories: Recurring Series

Everyday Moments | July 2022

1 – Moving my desk! My beautiful standing desk is on wheels so it’s very easy to move around. I think I’m going to try to move it every 3 months or so just so I can have a different view. Previously, it was facing the big window in my living room and now it’s facing the wall next to the window!

2 – Visiting my mom, who just tested positive for Covid. Since I just had it, I’m one of the only people who can visit her without getting sick, too! I brought her lunch and we played some games together.

3 – Starting Good Girls on Netflix. The first episode was so good!

4 – A low-key 4th of July. I slept in, did a long workout, visited with my mom, and took a short nap.

5 – Making a yummy dinner for myself.

6 – Watching the Big Brother premiere with my mom (and the dogs!)

7 – Sleeping in until 8 and then having snuggle time with Lila before getting up.

8 – Making a Reel (my first one ever!) for my mom’s birthday. I also went to dinner with my friend Amber and we had a really good conversation about dating, singleness, and loneliness. I can’t stress enough how amazing it is to have another “single in our 30s” friend to talk with.

9 – Snuggling up with baby blankets that Mikaela brought into Starbucks from her car during our writing date. It was freezing in there!

10 – Scheduling an emergency therapy appointment. Today was a hard day for my anxiety and I’m glad I reached out.

11 – A really healing therapy session. I cried a lot and it felt so good.

12 – Making a small speech in a meeting with 200+ people. It was so scary, but I was proud of myself for saying yes when my director asked me to do it.

13 – Putting together the cat’s new tower! It’s so much bigger and fancier than their previous one.

14 – Ellie spending most of the day on the cat tower. I was really expecting both cats to ignore the tower for a few weeks, as they normally do with new things. But she wanted to use it right away!

15 – Ordering in pizza and watching a comedy special on Netflix.

16 – Recording the last two episodes of season 1! I can’t believe we did it!

17 – Being able to sleep longer in the morning because the coffee date I had planned for that day was canceled. His loss!

18 – Starting off the week with a strong workout (20-minute spin, 20-minute strength, and a walk around the block)

19 – Taking a walk in the morning to take pictures of all the crepe myrtles around my apartment complex. Crepe myrtles are my favorite!

20 – A day off! I took Eloise to the vet and she received a sparkling report. Later that night, I had book club and it was a wonderful time.

21 – My robot vaccum was delivered! Once it charged for a bit, I let it do a spin around my bedroom and it did an insanely wonderful job!

22 – A really long, satisfying nap.

23 – Working on some podcast stuff, like finalizing our cover art and drafting some Instagram posts to announce our trailer episode. It’s all coming together for real!

24 – A movie date with Amber to see Where the Crawdads Sing. I really liked the movie!

25 – Booking a Labor Day getaway with Bri and Amber. We’re spending a few days at a gorgeous resort in Orlando that has a huge pool and lazy river. !!!

26 – Cooking a new recipe that was so good, and will definitely be a part of my regular rotation. (Recipe here, and yes, it’s from Tik Tok.)

27 – A lady date with Bri where we talked through some emotional friend stuff I’m going through, ordered pizza, and watched a comedy special.

28 – Buying some items off a friend’s classroom wish list. It felt really good to be able to support her in this way!

29 – Getting a massage that was so relaxing that I fell asleep. Oops!

30 – Celebrating mom’s birthday finally with game night and cake. My nephews were both in really great spirits, too, and my younger one, especially, had us cracking up with his one-liners. (I swear he’s going to grow up to become a comedian!)

31 – Publishing our podcast! Eeks… so nerve-wracking and exciting!

What was a highlight of July for you?

Categories: Recurring Series

Currently in July

Feeling… reinvigorated about dating after reading and loving the book How to Not Die Alone by Logan Ury. I’ve long felt apathetic about dating and after reading the book, I think it stems from my fear that I will go through a long and arduous dating process, wasting my precious time and money, and never find that great love of my life. And I’ve also felt like it should be easier to date, that because dating felt so hard meant there was something wrong with me. But dating is a skill; it’s really not natural for us to try to find love in this modern era of dating apps, so it makes sense that it takes work. Anyway, I am planning on writing a blog post soon about the lessons I’m taking away from this book and how I’m going to apply them to my dating life.

Watching… a lot of reality TV right now! It’s summertime so, of course, I’m watching my yearly fave, Big Brother. This show is on three times a week, there are accompanying daily podcasts to listen to, and live feeds of the contestants to watch, so it’s quite the time commitment! But I love it. I’m also watching The Challenge for the first time ever, which pits former reality TV stars together in a series of very, erm, challenging physical competitions. I’m finding it so fun to watch! And, lastly, I am watching The Bachelorette. It’s a weird season because they have two bachelorettes and it seems like production didn’t really figure out how this was going to work beforehand, so I think it’s going to get really messy really soon. But that’s why we watch reality TV, right?!

Listening to… Fad Camp. This podcast was recommended for people who love Maintenance Phase but wish it focused more on diets/diet culture and less on digging into diet-based research. I want to be clear that I love Maintenance Phase for what it is; I love when they get nerdy about research and find their episodes fascinating. But what I love about Fad Camp is that it focuses more on the hosts’ individual experiences with diets and diet culture. I love hearing about all the different diets we subject ourselves to so that we can fit into this idealized version of ourselves. The hosts are funny, self-deprecating, and seem like genuinely good friends. Plus, they have wonderful Irish accents that are fun to listen to!

Grateful… for my therapist. Being able to schedule an emergency therapy appointment with her earlier this month was amazing. I really needed her calming presence and helpful guidance as I worked through a really difficult anxiety spiral. Knowing I have her in my back pocket to help me when I get into these dark places is a sense of relief and comfort that I wish everyone could have.

Anticipating… our podcast launch! I can’t believe we’re releasing our trailer episode in just a few days! And then our first episode comes out on August 9th. This is going to be such a wild ride and I cannot wait for us to finally launch this little creative darling of ours into the world. We don’t have anything up on Instagram just yet, but you can follow us here if you’re so inclined.

Loathing… Covid. It has been a month of person after person in my family falling ill with Covid. First it was my mom, then it was my stepdad, and the latest person to get it was my brother. Thankfully, everyone recovered just fine and no worse for wear, but it has not been a fun month for us. We haven’t even been able to celebrate my mom’s birthday! I think we will finally be able to celebrate it this weekend, three full weeks after her actual birthday. But while everyone in my family getting Covid was scary and anxiety-inducing, I am just glad we got it now—when most of us are vaccinated and the strain is a lot less intense than previous iterations.

Thinking about… finally making the Peloton plunge. Well, I’ve been on the Peloton train for a year now but I don’t have the actual Peloton bike and there’s a part of me that really, really wants one. It would be nice to know if the resistance I’m using is anywhere close to where it needs to be (I have a cadence sensor but I don’t think there’s any tool I can get to track resistance) and to monitor my output. Since I am planning on canceling my massage membership, that will give me around $80-$100 back in my budget. And it got me thinking about financing a Peloton bike (no, I can’t afford to pay outright for a $2,000 bike)—the monthly cost of the bike + the additional membership fee ($44 a month for all-access membership, which is required if you have their bike, vs $15 for the bare-bones, app-based membership). It would come out to about the same price as what I was paying for the massage membership. I’m not fully convinced I want to take the plunge, but I’m about 70% of the way there.

Buying… lots of fun stuff:

A new cat tower – The cats love their new tower! Eloise is particularly fond of sleeping on the top platform while Lila loves curling up in one of the caves. I’m hoping Lila starts using the hammocks soon, since that’s the reason I bought this particular tower, but she’s a slow adopter of new things so it may just take some time.
A Roomba – I am so damn happy with my decision to get a Roomba! On Monday, I let it vacuum my entire apartment and it spend nearly 90 minutes scooting around my 700ish-square-foot space while I worked. It does a much better job of vacuuming than I could ever do on my own!
A new phone – It was a no-brainer to upgrade my phone, especially since the lease price for an iPhone 13 Pro is only going to cost me $4 a month! I’m really happy with my decision.

Loving… my new glasses! I finally ordered new Warby Parker glasses (from this post, I went with option 2!) and received them on Sunday. I’m still getting used to them but they honestly don’t feel too different (size-wise) from my previous glasses. It’s fun to have something new to wear around, though!

What’s something fun you bought this month?