Loving… how Christmassy my apartment is! Right now, as I write this post, my living room is awash in pretty Christmas lights. My tree is lit up and filled with ornaments, and waiting for presents to be stacked neatly underneath it. I’ve got garland and lights strung up over my sliding glass doors. My TV stand is filled with Christmassy decorations, a Christmas countdown, garland, and lights. And my door has a pretty wreath and a “Merry Christmas” welcome mat. In short, I am full-on the Christmas crazy train! I’m interested to see how my Christmas decorations will hold up once I have kittens next year. 😉

Loathing… the fact that I’m getting sick. Womp! I’ve had a scratchy throat all week and yesterday, I started having some chest congestion and sniffles. After work, I went right to the grocery store to pick up medicine (Mucinex, which usually works quickly and wonderfully for me!), soup, and ice cream. Fingers crossed I can nip this in the bud and it doesn’t morph into a full-blown sickness.

Watching… season seven of Friends. Ah, this show. It is exactly what I need right now. I’m nearly done with my rewatch, and I think I may just restart the series when I finish it. I just love it so much!

Listening to… How I Built This with Guy Raz. It’s all about the origin stories of big companies – I’m talking Spanx, Airbnb, Southwest Airlines, etc. He interviews the founders of these companies to learn how they got their ideas for it, all the times they failed, and how they became a success. It’s so interesting to learn how much these people had to hustle and be creative with new ideas and learn from their failures.

Anticipating… a Christmas cookie bake-off at work! We’ve been asked to wear ugly Christmas sweaters and bring in a batch of cookies for everyone to taste. I am excited to participate! I’ll be honest: I haven’t been the best at attending work things this past year. I’ve hidden behind my social anxiety to avoid things like potlucks and happy hours, which isn’t something I want to do. I recognize my social anxiety for what it is, but I don’t like for it to hold me back from things. I’ve also been really bummed about all my friends resigning and so I think I feel a little lost in my office right now. But I’ve made a decision to cut that out and be a more active participant in my company. I know I’m happier when I do so!

Grateful… that I was able to do another “Day of Stephany” for my birthday. Since my work graciously gives us our birthdays off, I made sure to make the most of it. I documented the entire day on Instagram (saved in a highlight!), but the best moments of my day were getting a massage, strolling through a bookstore, having lunch and also dinner with my mom, and taking a wonderful two-hour nap in the middle of the day. Next year, my birthday falls on Thanksgiving, so I may have to do my “Day of Stephany” the day before. 😉 I just adore my birthday so much and it’s really important to me to make it special. We all deserve a special day like that, and I feel grateful that it’s something I can do for myself.

Needing… to watch a sweet Christmas movie this weekend. I know some people were watching Christmas movies throughout November, but I’m a strict “no Christmas anything until after Thanksgiving.” No Christmas music, no shopping… none of that. But now the season is most definitely upon us and it’s time to get in my delightful Christmas movies. I am debating getting a Hallmark Movies Now subscription if only to have copious Hallmark holiday movies to indulge in over the month. Anybody invest in that? Thoughts?

What are you currently loving, anticipating, and grateful for?

Loving… that I finally sold my sectional! I listed my sectional for sale the first weekend in September and I heard crickets for weeks. I kept lowering my asking price, took some better photos, but still, nothing. Until last weekend, when all of a sudden, I received a flurry of messages inquiring about it! I finally sold it to a woman on Saturday, and she and a few friends came by to pick it up. And, just like that, no more sectional! I’m really glad it’s finally gone – my apartment feels so much bigger now! I’ve ordered a new couch, but it’s going to take six weeks to get here. Womp!

Loathing… the heat. Oy vey, September is always a fairly miserable month in Florida because the heat is always so intense. We’re regularly seeing heat indexes over 100 degrees with UV levels in the high to extreme range. And forget about the humidity. It’s not fun. Very thankful for air conditioning, both in my car and in my apartment. (I always seem to forget that AC isn’t a given in every part of the country. You’d never rent/buy in Florida without central AC!)

Watching… not much lately. Wednesday was the Big Brother season finale, and I was really, really happy with the person who won. But I’m not really sure to do with my time now that I’m not watching Big Brother three nights a week and scouring Reddit forums for theories. Maybe I’ll be able to finish season three of Mad Men before the end of the year, heh.

Listening to… the Presidential podcast. Has anyone listened to this? It’s a documentary-style podcast about our presidents – going chronologically, each episode explores a president, how he got into office, and the legacy he made. It starts with George Washington and ends with… well, you know who it ends with. It’s fascinating and I love that it’s not too dense and is easy to digest. However, it’s not a podcast I can put on in the background while I’m working. It requires active listening, so I typically listen to episodes while I’m on a walk. The podcast was originally published in 2016, so I’m a little late to the game, but wanted to throw it out there for anyone looking for an interesting podcast to listen to!

Anticipating… finally getting a kitten! I think I am ready to start making serious preparations to welcome a new kitty into my life. I’ve been emailing back and forth with a catpert (I trust you to figure out the portmanteau) to figure out exactly what I need and what I should expect. As someone who has never owned a cat, I am flying blind, so it’s nice to have a catpert to help me figure this all out! I am planning on placing a big order on Chewy.com today and maybe even visiting a shelter to scope it out this weekend. Maybe. (Also, my catpert has brought up the idea of welcoming two kitties into my life, instead of one. Please leave your argument for or against this decision in the comments.)

Grateful… for all the time I get to spend with my mom. Lately, I’ve been realizing how special our relationship is and how lucky I am to have her as my mom. I’ve always known that we have a one-of-a-kind relationship and that not many women get to have this type of closeness with their mothers, but it’s just been hitting me at different moments about how amazing our friendship is. She’s always been my favorite person to be with, and I feel like our bond is just growing stronger as the years pass. It’s a beautiful thing.

Needing… to upgrade my workout clothes. Most of my workout clothes I’ve had for years and years (I won’t even tell you how long I’ve had one of my sports bras…), and it’s just time to start replacing the clothes and buying stuff that makes me feel really good. I’m not talking about dropping a ton of money at Lululemon (I doubt they have my size anyway, sigh) (that sigh is towards Lululemon’s terrible sizing standards, not towards my own size), but just finding shorts and tanks that make me feel comfortable and confident when I wear them.

Tell me something you’re anticipating right now!

Loving… my new goal of walking 10,000 steps every day. I officially sent in my cancellation notice to my gym, which meant I needed to figure out what I was going to do for exercise. Okay, that’s a lie because I haven’t even been using the gym, but making that decision to quit the gym prompted me to think about what I wanted to do for exercise. And I decided to dust off my FitBit and commit to walking 10,000 steps every day. It is a HARD goal and requires getting in a 30-45 minute walk every day. And also, it forces me to get up from my desk and take short walks outside throughout the day. But I am really enjoying this new challenge. It’s great for my mental health (fresh air! exercise! vitamin d!) and great for sleep because my body is so ready to rest after being in motion all day.

Loathing… SI joint pain. The unpleasant side effect of moving my body to the tune of 10,000 steps a day is that I’m experiencing some soreness and pain in my tailbone. I think it might be my SI joint (that’s what Dr. Google tells me), so I’m trying to do some light stretching after I take a long walk. It seems to be helping, but I also think it may be time for me to visit a chiropractor. I’ve wanted to visit a chiropractor for a really long time because I’m pretty sure my spine is all sorts of jacked up after spending almost a decade at a desk job, even though I’m kinda terrified it will be super painful. But this SI joint pain is also pretty damn painful, so if a chiro can figure it out for me and allow me to friggin walk without pain, it’s worth it.

Watching… the last season of The Office. Y’all. It’s been a struggle to get through this season. The writing is just not at the level I expect from this show, and I kinda hate all of the plotlines. I even stopped it around episode 8 or 9 to watch four seasons of Friends back to back. But I am determined to finish this series at long last! Only a few more episodes to go, and I’m pretty sure I’ll cry like a baby at the series finale. I’m also slowwwwly making my way through season 3 of Mad Men. There’s just something about this show that doesn’t have me on the edge of my seat to watch the next episode, but I also enjoy it when I’m watching it. It’s weird.

Listening to… Dirty John. I know, I know. I’m wayyyy behind on this true crime podcast, but I was a little wary to listen to it because true crime can be a little too much for me. As I suspected, this podcast has been a bit triggering for me, but in a way I didn’t expect. It’s not triggering because of the scary content, but because Dirty John is eerily reminiscent of my dad, right down to the threatening phone messages, blaming his failures on everyone else, and manipulating women. At this point, I’m over halfway done so I think I’ll power through and finish it, but ugh. Why are men so terrible?!

Anticipating… the start of football season. I am so ready for the new NFL season and to spend my Sundays at my mom’s watching the games with my brother. There’s truly nothing better than that!

Grateful… to be feeling the best I’ve felt in a really long time. I would say that this is probably the best I’ve felt in maybe a year? Life has just been hard in a lot of different ways since October, which is when my vet told me it was time to start seriously monitoring Dutch for quality of life. From October – February, I was in a constant state of stress because taking care of a geriatric, blind, deaf dog who had dementia was a lot of work, especially for one person. Not to mention, I was constantly worried about Dutch and trying to make every day as comfortable and happy for him as possible. Then, I had to let Dutch go, and, well, my grief process has been very well documented on this blog. It’s been rough learning to live without him, but I feel like I’m finally beginning to see the light and find my way out. It feels really good.

Needing… to put a ban on Amazon. It’s actually gotten worse and not better since canceling Prime because now I just buy enough to qualify for free shipping (which usually means I add a book to my cart because why not?) and then order. I’ve placed five separate orders in August alone (totaling at least $30 each time…), so I think it’s time for me to tackle a shopping ban in September. My credit card needs a break.

What are you watching and anticipating?

Loving… my mechanic. I’ve been hearing a funny noise when I’m driving, and it’s been happening for over a month now. I finally had the time to take it to my mechanic to get it looked at, and it was diagnosed with bad wheel bearing. It was just under $300 to get it fixed, which is a hit to my budget, but not an unexpected expense. And now my car doesn’t make a funny noise! What makes this my “love” for July is just having a trustworthy mechanic who doesn’t upcharge me. When my mechanic told me it was probably a bad wheel bearing that was causing the noise, but he needed to look at it more closely to diagnose it, I did some Googling and was dismayed to find out the cost would be anywhere from $350-$500. (Double that if it was both front and rear wheel bearings that were bad.) I wasn’t sure if I wanted to put $1,000 in repairs into my car. Thankfully, it was only my rear wheel bearing that was shot and he charged me nearly $100 less than what my research told me. Having a good, honest mechanic is something I’ll never take for granted. (Also, funny story, I told my mechanic that my car had over 110,000 miles on it and he scoffed at that number. “Mine has 245,000.” I’d love for my car to last me another 100,000+ miles! Who knows!)

Loathing… buyer’s remorse. Ugh, it’s the worst. Here’s the story: I’ve had a $10 credit on ThredUp for years after sending in a bag of clothes and I finally decided to cash it in. (For those not aware, ThredUp is an online consignment shop, filled with gently used and like-new clothes, usually from top brands.) I spent $50 and got four shirts and two cardigans, which is a pretty darn good deal considering some of those shirts were from stores like Banana Republic and Loft. And yet… I’m not overly thrilled with my purchases. Not everything fits me like I want it to, which is the main reason I don’t love online shopping. I need to try things on! I could return some of the items (some of it was final sale), and I probably will, but I’m annoyed that ThredUp charges a $9 processing fee for refunds. However, I have wanted to see how the ThredUp buying/returning process worked to see if they were a viable option for finding new clothes and now I can see it’s not worth the hassle. Ya win some, ya lose some.

Watching… Friends. Can’t stop, won’t stop. I’m nearly finished with season three. I’ve put Mad Men on a complete halt while I rewatch Friends. I need the hilarity of this show in my life right now. I’m definitely planning to go back to Mad Men in the future because I do enjoy that show, but it’s a much different viewing experience and requires more of my attention. Friends is such a feel-good, comfort show and I’m leaning into that right now.

Listening to… Hysteria, which is the newest Crooked Media podcast. It’s a female-centric podcast, hosted by Erin Ryan. Every week, she and a group of women talk about stories that affect women’s lives through the lens of politics and culture. I’ve listened to the first three episodes so far and have loved every single one. It’s the kind of podcast that brings me a lot of hope, even in the midst of frustrating news.

Anticipating… my upcoming vision appointment. Am I the only one who actually looks forward to seeing the eye doctor? I love getting my eyes checked! It’s fun to play the “1 or 2” game and find out how my vision has changed from year to year. I’m planning on getting new glasses (somehow, it’s been five years since I got a new pair of glasses, oops) as well as finally purchasing prescription sunglasses. Can you believe I’ve never had prescription sunglasses? One of the main reasons I wear contacts is that I need to wear sunglasses whenever I’m outside (my eyes are super sensitive to light). While I don’t think I’ll ever give up contacts entirely, it’ll be nice to have a choice if I want to wear them or not.

Grateful for… a three-paycheck month and extra income. There are few things more exciting to me than when that three-paycheck month rolls around. And with some extra income coming in through freelance writing, it means I’ll really be able to attack my credit card in August. If I can manage to cut my balance in half, I’ll be one happy camper.

Needing… to make a decision about my gym membership. I’m basically paying my gym $35 a month and not getting anything out of it. I haven’t been in months. I want to keep my gym membership because I like having access to spin classes, but it’s been really hard to motivate myself to attend. Thankfully, they just switched instructors for the Monday and Wednesday morning classes (the instructor they had before was pretty awful and I never felt like I got a good workout when she taught), so I might try to make it to one of those classes to see how I like the new instructor. I know I feel better when I’m consistent with spin classes, but if this new instructor is no good, I might have to cancel my gym membership and figure something else out.

What are you currently loving, loathing, and watching?

Loving… melatonin. I started having insomnia early in June, around the time I was experiencing a particularly brutal depressive episode. Sleep usually comes easily for me, so this insomnia was a very unpleasant visitor! I decided to take matters into my own hands and picked up a bottle of melatonin at the grocery store. I take a 3mg dose and it works wonders for me. I fall asleep easily, stay asleep, and wake up feeling good. God bless you, melatonin.

Loathing… the news, so I’m not paying attention to it right now. Can I do that because I’m in a privileged position? Yup. But the news has been so depressing and so heartbreaking lately that I had to protect my mental health. So, I decided to take a month off. A month off from episodes of Pod Save America, a month off from the news-y email newsletters I get, a month off from constantly reading the news and getting defeated. I had to, or I was going to go crazy. It’s too much for me right now. This administration is sickening. And I needed to step away. I am so glad I did.

Watching… Big Brother! The summer is upon us, friends, and with that comes the only show I watch in real-time. Big Brother is completely ridiculous and I recognize that, but I just can’t quit it. I love that it’s on three days a week and that I can get completely consumed by the people and the backstabbing and the competitions. Bring it on!

Listening to… Jen Gotch is OK Sometimes. I’ve been following Jen Gotch for a while, and I love how open and honest she is about her mental illness. I mean, I started following her the day she was filming herself through a panic attack at an airport! There was something refreshing about it. Not too many people are taking you on the day-to-day journey of what it’s like to struggle with mental illness. So, of course, once Jen said she was starting a podcast, I immediately subscribed. I am really, really loving it. It’s not a polished, perfect thing, but that’s the beauty in it. It’s real. It’s honest. It’s a must-listen for anyone who struggles with mental illness, or for people who want to better understand mental illness.

Anticipating… a weekend trip to Anna Maria Island. I’m taking the trip with my girlfriends, and we rented a house right by the beach. It’ll be a fun, relaxing weekend full of books, silly games, inside jokes, and plenty of naps. 🙂 We know how to travel well together.

Grateful for… a new freelancing assignment. Woo, boy, did it come at the right time. I’ve been a little stressy about money lately because I’ve had several expensive car repairs and have to come up with money for my upcoming vacation ($200 for the rental house, and who knows how much for food and activities). Argh! It feels like I can never get ahead with my finances, sometimes. Thankfully, my car will be paid off next month and that will free up over $200 in my budget. Thank the Lord.

Needing… to make another appointment to get my vehicle inspected. The service center I took it to last week told me my car was fine and no repairs or replacements were necessary. And I find that really hard to believe, especially with the way it’s been driving lately. Honestly, I think they only checked the battery, brakes, and tires – all of which have been replaced within the last six months. I wish I would have clarified with the service center but hello, social anxiety. I couldn’t get the words out. Sigh. I think I need to get a second opinion about the car, and I’m going to take her to a local mechanic to get a real inspection and make sure I clarify what parts of my car I want inspected (i.e., the belts, the fluids, spark plugs, etc.) Also, I realize what a boring paragraph this is. You’re welcome?

What are you currently watching and anticipating?