Loving… my new bedtime. I’m trying to focus on getting into bed by 9 p.m. every night, something I haven’t been doing for a really long time. (At least since I’ve been working from home.) A lot of times, I don’t even start my nighttime routine until 9:30 or 10:00 and then I’m rushing around trying to get everything done so I can get to bed before 11. It’s really unpleasant. To make my new bedtime, I have a cut-off time for TV and computer work by 8:30 so I can get through my nighttime routine and be in bed by 9 p.m. Then, I spend an hour or so reading and 15-20 minutes watching ASMR videos on YouTube, with lights out by 10:30. It’s been amazing so far! It gives me lots of time to read and wind down at the end of the day, without feeling like I’m rushing around like a crazy person.

Loathing… that there are still way too many weeks between now and when my mom gets Lucy (my new baby fur-sister). Her official adoption date is May 24th and I’m taking time off work so I can go with my mom to pick her up and then play with her for the rest of the day! I’m so ready to meet her!

Watching… season two of The Crown and season four of Schitt’s Creek. I’m loving both! This is my second time around with Schitt’s Creek (I love that show so much, and it’s even better the second time). The Crown has been fascinating, especially since there was so much I didn’t know about Queen Elizabeth II. It’s not always a super-exciting show to watch, but it’s teaching me so much and the acting is phenomenal.

Listening to… Confronting OJ Simpson. This podcast is produced by Kim Goldman, whose brother Ron was killed along with Nicole Brown Simpson in 1994 by (allegedly?) OJ Simpson. Kim talks to everyone involved in the case—prosecutors, journalists, witnesses, and even jury members—to get to the bottom of how OJ was acquitted. I was way too young to follow this trial when it happened and I only know loose details, so I’m learning a lot. It’s a difficult, heavy podcast at times as Kim grapples with this tragedy that happened when she was just 22 (and as close as I am with my brother, her loss hits me hard). But it’s been fascinating, too, especially considering the OJ Simpson trial was dubbed the “Trial of the Century” and so many people watched it live.

Grateful for… getting vaccinated. I got my second Pfizer shot yesterday, and the more I think about being fully vaccinated two weeks from now, the more emotional I get. I will admit that the pandemic didn’t hit me nearly as hard as it did for other people. In many ways, it improved my life because I got to start working from home full-time and my social anxiety was at an all-time low. Of course, I was nervous about getting Covid but I tried to be proactive about doing what I could to limit my exposure. It helped that my county has had a mask mandate since the beginning of the pandemic, even if the rest of Florida is doing whatever the hell it wants. But even still, I am so grateful that I was able to get my vaccinations, and much, much sooner than I anticipated. I am grateful to have avoided getting Covid (that I know of). I am grateful for every high-risk person who doesn’t have to live in fear of Covid anymore. We’re almost through this.

Anticipating… a three-day staycation in May! My mom and stepdad are going away on vacation in May and need me to watch Chip, so I decided to give myself a little break, too. April was a really insane month of work (enough that I worked all weekend for the past two weekends, ugh) and I need the time off. Plus, the logistics of watching Chip while taking care of my cats can get a little crazy since I stay at my mom’s when I’m watching him. Maybe one day he can peacefully coexist with the cats, but he’s way too much of a wild man for them right now! So it gets a little nuts traveling back and forth between homes, and it will be much easier to do that if I don’t also have to think about work. I’ve planned something to do each day: a massage, a hair appointment, and an eye appointment, and will try my best not to turn on my work computer AT ALL during my time off. I just want to sleep and read and swim and play with Chip. 🙂

Thinking about… how different our bodies can feel from day to day. Ever notice how something that felt easy one day suddenly feels like the biggest challenge the next day? This has been happening to me a lot this week, and it’s frustrating. I know I’m not a robot, so things are bound to feel different from one day to the next, but it’s hard not to think that it says something about me and my internal motivations. I’m trying to give myself more grace to take it easy on those days when I’m in a funk and everything seems hard. It doesn’t have to mean anything. It’s just my body’s way of telling me to slow down for a bit.

Wishing… for a cruise vacation. Man, I miss cruising so much! But I don’t know if I’m quite ready for that just yet. Maybe in 2022. But I do miss traveling and airports and hotels and sightseeing and being out of my normal routine. I can’t wait to reintroduce travel into my life!

Buying… supplies to organize my little “office.” I bought a new desk chair (it arrived yesterday!) that I will put together this weekend. And I bought some cord organizers to try to tidy up my cord situation. I have SO MANY cords for my work computer and it looks so messy. It’s been driving me crazy for a while, so I finally found some solutions to tidy everything up that I hope work. (I bought this cable management box and these cord wrapping bands.)

Feeling… both excitement and dread about re-entering the dating world once I’m fully vaccinated. I’m excited to see what’s out there, but I also know how demoralizing online dating is. I’m trying to remind myself of all the fun things about dating: trying new restaurants, conversating with someone totally new, first kisses, and that overwhelming feeling of possibility.

What are you currently watching, anticipating, and grateful for?

Loving… my spin bike! Of course! I have really enjoyed doing the beginner spin workouts on the Peloton app and I’ve already seen a difference in my performance. (The first few rides, my elbows, forearms, and wrists hurt from holding my upper body up, and now they don’t bother me at all!) I want to get a cadence sensor for my bike since the instructors seem to really focus on it in the classes and my non-Peloton bike doesn’t have a way to measure cadence. (I’ve just been working at a speed/resistance that feels good to me.) I think I can “graduate” from the beginner workouts, though, so that’s exciting!

Loathing… how hot it is already! Ugh, Florida. We’re already seeing temps in the 90s and it’s not even April! Thankfully, we’re getting these little temperature dips every now and then (this weekend, the highs are in the low to mid-70s!) so it’s not so bad, but I am not ready for summer weather just yet.

Watching… the current season of Nailed It! I was so surprised when I logged into Netflix and saw that a new season was released. I’m not a TV binger by any means, but I consumed the entire season over the weekend. It was perfection! Nicole Byer can do no wrong in my eyes.

Listening to… Nothing Much Happens, a podcast that gives you a bedtime story to fall asleep to. I’ve only recently started listening to this podcast (typically, I listen to ASMR videos on YouTube to fall asleep), but it’s really lovely and relaxing. It sends me to a soothing, happy place to fall asleep.

Grateful… that I was able to schedule my COVID-19 vaccine appointment! Florida is opening up vaccines to everyone over age 18 on April 5th, and I secured an appointment for April 8th. I’m so thrilled! This means I will be fully vaccinated by mid-May. I don’t know if this will change my day-to-day life much, but I’m just excited to see more and more people get vaccinated. We’re only at 14% of fully vaccinated Americans, but hopefully, by the end of May, that number will be dramatically higher.

Anticipating… potentially a tropical vacation this summer. With my mom and I soon to be vaccinated, we can start thinking about how we want to use our flight credit from the trip we had to cancel in 2020. It’s been fun to look up flights and hotels and to daydream about getting away. Planning vacations is one of my most favorite things, and I’ve missed it so!

Thinking about… investing in a few Olive & June products to start doing my nails again. I don’t paint my nails, ever, but I was influenced by a Bookstagrammer who was raving about Olive & June so I went to their site and started playing around. I could have easily dropped $50+ on new nail polish and dry drops and a special polish brush… thank goodness for the March spending limit I have myself on! I do miss having pretty colors on my nails but I probably need to take it slow (maybe just get a new color and topcoat?) to see if this is something I actually want. Hmm… perhaps I can reward myself with new Olive & June products every time I go a week without chipping my nail polish? Ha.

Inspired by… conversations about marriage with a friend. I have a friend who is so honest and open with me about her marriage, even discussing their disagreements and the way they work through them. It’s so eye-opening to me! I think there is so much about marriage that is hidden behind closed doors—like it’s taboo to talk about it. This friend has a really strong and stable marriage, but of course, she and her partner fight from time to time because that’s what couples do! I love hearing about the ins and outs of her marriage, mostly because it reminds me of how important it is to communicate in a marriage and be truly vulnerable about what you need since nobody is a mind reader. Anyway, it’s been inspiring and I’m glad she feels that she can share the realities of marriage with me.

Researching… how to get rid of the dark spots on my face (caused by acne). I’ve been meticulously keeping a multistep skincare routine for a few months now, and I’ve seen marked improvements from it. Even my esthetician is impressed with my clear pores and soft skin! But what hasn’t improved are all the dark spots dotting my chin and jawline from acne (I’m a serial popper + picker, sigh). I don’t necessarily want to try a chemical peel or microdermabrasion just yet, so I’ve been researching other skincare remedies I can try, like a dark spot serum. It’s something my esthetician recommended for me and I think I’m going to buy Murad’s Rapid Dark Spot Correcting Serum. I’ve had great luck with Murad’s products in the past so I’m crossing my fingers this one will work just as well. (And for the price, it better—whew!)

What are you currently loving, watching, and grateful for?

Loving… how Christmassy my apartment is! Right now, as I write this post, my living room is awash in pretty Christmas lights. My tree is lit up and filled with ornaments, and waiting for presents to be stacked neatly underneath it. I’ve got garland and lights strung up over my sliding glass doors. My TV stand is filled with Christmassy decorations, a Christmas countdown, garland, and lights. And my door has a pretty wreath and a “Merry Christmas” welcome mat. In short, I am full-on the Christmas crazy train! I’m interested to see how my Christmas decorations will hold up once I have kittens next year. 😉

Loathing… the fact that I’m getting sick. Womp! I’ve had a scratchy throat all week and yesterday, I started having some chest congestion and sniffles. After work, I went right to the grocery store to pick up medicine (Mucinex, which usually works quickly and wonderfully for me!), soup, and ice cream. Fingers crossed I can nip this in the bud and it doesn’t morph into a full-blown sickness.

Watching… season seven of Friends. Ah, this show. It is exactly what I need right now. I’m nearly done with my rewatch, and I think I may just restart the series when I finish it. I just love it so much!

Listening to… How I Built This with Guy Raz. It’s all about the origin stories of big companies – I’m talking Spanx, Airbnb, Southwest Airlines, etc. He interviews the founders of these companies to learn how they got their ideas for it, all the times they failed, and how they became a success. It’s so interesting to learn how much these people had to hustle and be creative with new ideas and learn from their failures.

Anticipating… a Christmas cookie bake-off at work! We’ve been asked to wear ugly Christmas sweaters and bring in a batch of cookies for everyone to taste. I am excited to participate! I’ll be honest: I haven’t been the best at attending work things this past year. I’ve hidden behind my social anxiety to avoid things like potlucks and happy hours, which isn’t something I want to do. I recognize my social anxiety for what it is, but I don’t like for it to hold me back from things. I’ve also been really bummed about all my friends resigning and so I think I feel a little lost in my office right now. But I’ve made a decision to cut that out and be a more active participant in my company. I know I’m happier when I do so!

Grateful… that I was able to do another “Day of Stephany” for my birthday. Since my work graciously gives us our birthdays off, I made sure to make the most of it. I documented the entire day on Instagram (saved in a highlight!), but the best moments of my day were getting a massage, strolling through a bookstore, having lunch and also dinner with my mom, and taking a wonderful two-hour nap in the middle of the day. Next year, my birthday falls on Thanksgiving, so I may have to do my “Day of Stephany” the day before. 😉 I just adore my birthday so much and it’s really important to me to make it special. We all deserve a special day like that, and I feel grateful that it’s something I can do for myself.

Needing… to watch a sweet Christmas movie this weekend. I know some people were watching Christmas movies throughout November, but I’m a strict “no Christmas anything until after Thanksgiving.” No Christmas music, no shopping… none of that. But now the season is most definitely upon us and it’s time to get in my delightful Christmas movies. I am debating getting a Hallmark Movies Now subscription if only to have copious Hallmark holiday movies to indulge in over the month. Anybody invest in that? Thoughts?

What are you currently loving, anticipating, and grateful for?

Loving… that I finally sold my sectional! I listed my sectional for sale the first weekend in September and I heard crickets for weeks. I kept lowering my asking price, took some better photos, but still, nothing. Until last weekend, when all of a sudden, I received a flurry of messages inquiring about it! I finally sold it to a woman on Saturday, and she and a few friends came by to pick it up. And, just like that, no more sectional! I’m really glad it’s finally gone – my apartment feels so much bigger now! I’ve ordered a new couch, but it’s going to take six weeks to get here. Womp!

Loathing… the heat. Oy vey, September is always a fairly miserable month in Florida because the heat is always so intense. We’re regularly seeing heat indexes over 100 degrees with UV levels in the high to extreme range. And forget about the humidity. It’s not fun. Very thankful for air conditioning, both in my car and in my apartment. (I always seem to forget that AC isn’t a given in every part of the country. You’d never rent/buy in Florida without central AC!)

Watching… not much lately. Wednesday was the Big Brother season finale, and I was really, really happy with the person who won. But I’m not really sure to do with my time now that I’m not watching Big Brother three nights a week and scouring Reddit forums for theories. Maybe I’ll be able to finish season three of Mad Men before the end of the year, heh.

Listening to… the Presidential podcast. Has anyone listened to this? It’s a documentary-style podcast about our presidents – going chronologically, each episode explores a president, how he got into office, and the legacy he made. It starts with George Washington and ends with… well, you know who it ends with. It’s fascinating and I love that it’s not too dense and is easy to digest. However, it’s not a podcast I can put on in the background while I’m working. It requires active listening, so I typically listen to episodes while I’m on a walk. The podcast was originally published in 2016, so I’m a little late to the game, but wanted to throw it out there for anyone looking for an interesting podcast to listen to!

Anticipating… finally getting a kitten! I think I am ready to start making serious preparations to welcome a new kitty into my life. I’ve been emailing back and forth with a catpert (I trust you to figure out the portmanteau) to figure out exactly what I need and what I should expect. As someone who has never owned a cat, I am flying blind, so it’s nice to have a catpert to help me figure this all out! I am planning on placing a big order on Chewy.com today and maybe even visiting a shelter to scope it out this weekend. Maybe. (Also, my catpert has brought up the idea of welcoming two kitties into my life, instead of one. Please leave your argument for or against this decision in the comments.)

Grateful… for all the time I get to spend with my mom. Lately, I’ve been realizing how special our relationship is and how lucky I am to have her as my mom. I’ve always known that we have a one-of-a-kind relationship and that not many women get to have this type of closeness with their mothers, but it’s just been hitting me at different moments about how amazing our friendship is. She’s always been my favorite person to be with, and I feel like our bond is just growing stronger as the years pass. It’s a beautiful thing.

Needing… to upgrade my workout clothes. Most of my workout clothes I’ve had for years and years (I won’t even tell you how long I’ve had one of my sports bras…), and it’s just time to start replacing the clothes and buying stuff that makes me feel really good. I’m not talking about dropping a ton of money at Lululemon (I doubt they have my size anyway, sigh) (that sigh is towards Lululemon’s terrible sizing standards, not towards my own size), but just finding shorts and tanks that make me feel comfortable and confident when I wear them.

Tell me something you’re anticipating right now!

Loving… my new goal of walking 10,000 steps every day. I officially sent in my cancellation notice to my gym, which meant I needed to figure out what I was going to do for exercise. Okay, that’s a lie because I haven’t even been using the gym, but making that decision to quit the gym prompted me to think about what I wanted to do for exercise. And I decided to dust off my FitBit and commit to walking 10,000 steps every day. It is a HARD goal and requires getting in a 30-45 minute walk every day. And also, it forces me to get up from my desk and take short walks outside throughout the day. But I am really enjoying this new challenge. It’s great for my mental health (fresh air! exercise! vitamin d!) and great for sleep because my body is so ready to rest after being in motion all day.

Loathing… SI joint pain. The unpleasant side effect of moving my body to the tune of 10,000 steps a day is that I’m experiencing some soreness and pain in my tailbone. I think it might be my SI joint (that’s what Dr. Google tells me), so I’m trying to do some light stretching after I take a long walk. It seems to be helping, but I also think it may be time for me to visit a chiropractor. I’ve wanted to visit a chiropractor for a really long time because I’m pretty sure my spine is all sorts of jacked up after spending almost a decade at a desk job, even though I’m kinda terrified it will be super painful. But this SI joint pain is also pretty damn painful, so if a chiro can figure it out for me and allow me to friggin walk without pain, it’s worth it.

Watching… the last season of The Office. Y’all. It’s been a struggle to get through this season. The writing is just not at the level I expect from this show, and I kinda hate all of the plotlines. I even stopped it around episode 8 or 9 to watch four seasons of Friends back to back. But I am determined to finish this series at long last! Only a few more episodes to go, and I’m pretty sure I’ll cry like a baby at the series finale. I’m also slowwwwly making my way through season 3 of Mad Men. There’s just something about this show that doesn’t have me on the edge of my seat to watch the next episode, but I also enjoy it when I’m watching it. It’s weird.

Listening to… Dirty John. I know, I know. I’m wayyyy behind on this true crime podcast, but I was a little wary to listen to it because true crime can be a little too much for me. As I suspected, this podcast has been a bit triggering for me, but in a way I didn’t expect. It’s not triggering because of the scary content, but because Dirty John is eerily reminiscent of my dad, right down to the threatening phone messages, blaming his failures on everyone else, and manipulating women. At this point, I’m over halfway done so I think I’ll power through and finish it, but ugh. Why are men so terrible?!

Anticipating… the start of football season. I am so ready for the new NFL season and to spend my Sundays at my mom’s watching the games with my brother. There’s truly nothing better than that!

Grateful… to be feeling the best I’ve felt in a really long time. I would say that this is probably the best I’ve felt in maybe a year? Life has just been hard in a lot of different ways since October, which is when my vet told me it was time to start seriously monitoring Dutch for quality of life. From October – February, I was in a constant state of stress because taking care of a geriatric, blind, deaf dog who had dementia was a lot of work, especially for one person. Not to mention, I was constantly worried about Dutch and trying to make every day as comfortable and happy for him as possible. Then, I had to let Dutch go, and, well, my grief process has been very well documented on this blog. It’s been rough learning to live without him, but I feel like I’m finally beginning to see the light and find my way out. It feels really good.

Needing… to put a ban on Amazon. It’s actually gotten worse and not better since canceling Prime because now I just buy enough to qualify for free shipping (which usually means I add a book to my cart because why not?) and then order. I’ve placed five separate orders in August alone (totaling at least $30 each time…), so I think it’s time for me to tackle a shopping ban in September. My credit card needs a break.

What are you watching and anticipating?