Stephany Writes

Categories: Recurring Series

TGIF (v. 62)

The high of my week was having so much social time. I had a fun movie night with friends on Monday night (we watched The Idea of You, and I really liked it!) and Tuesday night, I went to Topgolf with another friend. I also had a roommate for a night—I mentioned that my mom is getting her bathroom remodeled and because the house was still toilet-less as of Monday, she stayed with me for a night, which was lovely! (Her house was no longer toilet-less by Tuesday, so back home she went!) She also came over Wednesday night after our workout class so we could watch our shows (Survivor and The Amazing Race) and she could take a shower. I love having weeks where I don’t have any plans and can just be a lump in the evenings, but balancing that with busy social weeks is good for my soul.

The low of my week was an itchy scalp. My scalp psoriasis has been horrible this week, so damn itchy and uncomfortable. I’ve been slathering on steroid gel along with an OTC cream, and the itchiness seems to be improving. This latest flare seems different than normal flares, and I think I’ve pinpointed the cause: hair dye. I had the same type of flare the last time couple of times I got my hair colored, but never connected the flare with the source. Well, at least now I know! I either need to see if there’s a different type of formula my hair stylist can use when creating my hair dye or just accept that I’m going to have a flare after a hair appointment.

One nagging task I marked off my to-do list was mopping the floors. Why is this task so arduous? I’m not going to tell you guys the last time I mopped because it would be too embarrassing, but I hate doing it and it’s one of those chores that constantly falls off my to-do list. The floors get vacuumed regularly thanks to Ruby the Robot, but they also need a good scrubbing every once in a while, and that finally happened this week. Freshly mopped floors make me so happy!

I’m currently reading two books. On audio, I’m listening to Not a Happy Family by Shari Lapena, which my friend Lynn highly recommended. I’m a few hours in and loving it! I also just started Anita Kelly’s new queer romance, How You Get the Girl. She’s one of my auto-buy authors who hasn’t written a bad romance yet, and this one is no different (so far)!

A blog post I loved was A Day in Maggie’s Life by knit read cats hockey, where she took us through a random day in her cat, Maggie’s, life. How cute, right? I am stealing this idea so please be prepared for a day in the life of Ellie and Lila very soon. It will involve a lot of sleeping, begging for treats, and belly rubs.

The best money I spent was $12 on a new iPhone case. I was hoping the iPhone case I’ve been using would fit on my new phone (I upgraded from the iPhone 13 Pro to the iPhone 15 Pro), but alas, the 15 is just a smidge bigger so I needed a new case and I needed it to get here fast. (I hate using my phone without a case!) So I bought a cheap one from Amazon that arrived the next day. It’s a bit boring (plain purple) and I’m someone who likes a fun iPhone case, but it serves its purpose. The question now is… do I upgrade to a case that expresses my style more? I have my eye on this cat-themed case or this colorful case. Decisions, decisions!

My plans this weekend include a girl’s night in tonight at Bri’s house where we’ll enjoy pizza, pool time, and games. Tomorrow, I have a writing date with Mikaela and then I’m going to the Tampa CATstravaganza with my mom. (!!!) To say I am excited is an understatement! I think we might also have game night with my brother on Saturday evening, so it will be a very busy day. And Sunday, I’ll have a low-key day at home. My mom and I are thinking of trying out a Zumba class Sunday morning, but that’s all my plans for the day.

What was the high of your week? Do you have any fun weekend plans?

Categories: Recurring Series

A Monday Morning Coffee Date

Let’s sit down for a coffee date on this Monday morning. I’ll be sipping on an iced vanilla latte, mmm!

If we were having coffee today, you might be a little surprised by my appearance. I was brave at the hair salon on Friday afternoon and got bangs! I also did a full balayage, so I spent a pretty penny at my appointment. But it isn’t something I’ll have to do regularly, so there’s that. I’m happy with the way everything turned out and it’s so fun to have bangs again!

If we were having coffee today, I might excitedly pull up my blog on my phone because it got an update! During my writing date on Saturday, I finally finished my blog recategorization project by cleaning up all of my tags and then decided to launch my new blog theme right then and there. I had already “favorited” a bunch of WordPress templates on Etsy and played around with some fonts I liked on Canva, so it wasn’t quite a spontaneous decision, but I did think I would wait longer than a few minutes to install the new theme. Alas, I decided it was time and I am so excited about a fresh, new look for this blog of mine.

If we were having coffee today, I’d probably talk about my chiropractor appointments. I have graduated to weekly appointments, but y’all, I gotta say, I’m not seeing much of a difference. I am still waking up every morning with pain and I still cannot walk around for longer than 10 minutes without pain. My Chiropractor in Collinsville, IL tells me that this is all part of the recovery process and things are getting better… but I am unconvinced. My plan is to finish out these chiropractor appointments (my last one will be in early June) and if the pain has still not gone away, then I want to try physical therapy. A friend gave me a referral to an orthopedist who worked wonders on her lower back pain, so I think that may be my next step.

If we were having coffee today, I’d discuss how I added my mom to “Find My Friends” and now can track her whenever I want! I don’t know if my mom is thrilled about this development, but I am! We’ve both shared our locations with each other indefinitely, which means now if I’m feeling anxious about her, I can just look up her location on the app and know she’s safe at home (or work, or wherever). It has done wonders for my mental health, I’ll tell you that! Sometimes I get anxious about something happening to her on the way home from dinner or a hair appointment, and now I can just check the app and see where she is! Technology can be a beautiful mental health resource for sure.

If we were having coffee today, I’d tell you about the most enneagram 9 thing I did at Target this weekend. I went to Target after my hair appointment to pick up a Mother’s Day card for my mom and see if there was anything else I could add to her gift. And I left with a new phone plan. ????? As I was walking down one of the main aisles to get to the book section, I passed by an AT&T rep who first complimented me on my tattoos and then asked how much I was paying for my phone plan. When he told me it was outrageous to spend $135 a month for one person and that he could get me a brand-new iPhone 15 Pro and a new plan for $85 a month, I started listening. And thirty minutes later, I had signed up for the new plan and walked away in a daze because I wasn’t sure what had come over me. I mean, how do I turn down spending $40 less a month on my phone plan?! And I get to upgrade my phone for free?! It was a no brainer, but it was also very enneagram 9 of me to do this because I was drawn in by the salesperson’s demeanor and wanted to help him make a sale. LOLZ.

If we were having coffee today, I might moan and groan about how hard it is to get everything I want to get done in a day. And I feel really silly about complaining about this when I am single, childless, and have a fairly flexible work schedule. And still! I am struggling to find time for chores and errands and exercise and blogging and reading blogs and reading books and podcast work and maintaining my friendships and dating and playing with the cats and goals I set for myself each month and and and. Things would be a lot easier if I wasn’t a napper (and I’m hoping my need for extra sleep will dissipate somewhat once I’m using a CPAP for my sleep apnea), but alas, I lose out on a lot of hours on the weekends because I just want to be unconscious. I’ve tried schedules. I’ve tried cleaning charts. I’ve tried time blocking. None of it works. I guess we’re all just trying to do the best we can? But ugh. Life.

If we were having coffee today, I’d want to know what’s going on in your life! What would you talk about with me?

Categories: Recurring Series

Five for Friday (v. 103)

1) Lila turns 6!

My sweet darling Lila Bear turned 6 years old on Wednesday. Unfortunately, I spent almost the entire day away from her so I felt like a bad cat mom, but thankfully, she’s a cat and doesn’t understand the concept of birthdays. 😉 I made sure to give her extra treats and extra love on Wednesday night, and on Thursday, I got out some of her favorite toys for playtime. There is so much to say about this baby girl of mine. She is sweet and snuggly and adorable. She’s insanely photogenic and has a squeaky meow that gets me every time. She is shy and skittish, and hides from people when they come over, but trusts me completely. There’s something sweet about being her person! I wish she were more cooperative about being picked up, but alas, she is who she is! She was rescued from the streets when she was around 8 months old so who knows what her life was like during those first few months of her life? At least she’s now in a safe, warm, peaceful environment. <3

I have a special song for her and her ears twitch every time I sing it to her:

Lila Bear, Lila Bear
She’s my Lila, Lila Bear
She’s so little and so cute
She’s my Lila, Lila Bear

Creative, I know. Taylor Swift will be calling me any day to help with songwriting for her next album.

2) I spent $300 on shoes this weekend

I’ve known for a while that I needed to spend a good amount of money on new shoes. I have high-maintenance feet (plantar fasciitis, high arches, weak ankles, etc.) so I need shoes that are supportive and well-made. I went to the outlet mall with my mom this weekend and bought myself my first pair of Birkenstocks—for the past few years, I’ve been wearing a fake pair of Birks that I got from Target and they have held up well, but they are very quickly wearing down. The Birkenstocks I bought on Saturday were just over $100. And then I went to the Asics store to finally buy myself a new pair of running shoes. Asics is a great shoe brand for me and my feet love them, so it’s a no-brainer to continue with Asics going forward. I tried on at least 8 different shoes in the store and ended up buying two pairs because I truly couldn’t decide which one I liked better, and one of the pairs was on sale for $90. The other pair was around $140 but I got it for right around $100 due to a few discounts. So, honestly, $300 for three pairs of good shoes is not that much money, especially measuring the cost per wear. I knew this purchase was coming, and while it broke my brain a bit to spend so much money on shoes, I am really happy I did it. (Now comes the fun part of breaking in my new Birkenstocks, ahhh.)

3) A Wednesday day off

My mom is currently getting her bathroom remodeled and it all kicked off this week, so she’s staying at a cute VRBO house with the dogs until Monday while the big work gets done (mainly because the house is toilet-less during the demo and flooring installation). On Wednesday, I took the day off to hang with her at the VRBO and got to have oodles of cuddle time with the dogs, which is always my favorite! We went out for lunch and then, since we were close to the place where I got my nose pierced, we also went there so I could change out my nose piercing. Yay! I finally have a hoop piercing and I love it so much.

4) CPAP titration study

I was able to get my CPAP titration sleep study scheduled… for August 3rd. Can you believe that?! They are fully booked out for four months! I asked to be put on a cancellation list, but this was really troubling news for me. I just want to get this sleep study over with so I can finally start using a CPAP machine and sleeping better. Ugh. I need to call the sleep center again to find out if there are appointments available sooner at any of the other sleep centers around the area—it slipped my mind to ask when I was scheduling the study originally. Even if I have to drive an hour out of my way, it would be worth it!

5) Weekend plans

It’s going to be a good weekend over here! Today, I have a hair appointment where I’m making a big change to both the color and cut of my hair. I’m doing a full balayage (I’ve just been doing all-over color for the past year-ish) and then, if I don’t chicken out, I’m getting bangs! On Saturday, I have my regular writing date with Mikaela and the rest of the day is mine for the taking. Maybe I’ll spend a few hours by the pool? And Sunday is Mother’s Day and I have brunch reservations at a yummy place downtown, so it should be a lovely day of celebrating the best person in my life!

Do you make silly songs for your pets? What are your weekend plans?

Categories: Recurring Series

Currently in April

Loving… my fun beach day at Egmont Key! For someone who lives near so many beaches, it is very rare for me to actually visit them. I find the beach to be a bit unpleasant what with the parking and the people and the sand and the lugging of all the beach necessities. But Bri and I wanted to visit Egmont Key because we learned that it is home to the spookiest area of Florida. We took a ferry to the island where we spent an hour roaming around—Egmont Key used to be a fort used to protect Tampa Bay during the Spanish-American War. It was also a place where the Tocobaga tribe lived until it was taken over by the Spanish. Egmont Key was also used by soldiers and their families during the Spanish-American War and at one time had 300 residents! During our roaming, we saw some ruins and also toured a few of the old batteries (aka, where they would shoot off cannons) that were still standing today. Of course, the main reason people come to Egmont Key is to relax and we for sure made time for that. We had two hours to relax on the beach and enjoy the ocean before we had to get back on the ferry. All in all, it was such a lovely day! (And that post-adventure nap was amazing.) I’ll sprinkle some pictures from the day into this post!

Loathing… feeling out of shape. I know, I know. I’m working on this! Yesterday during our adventure, just walking through sand caused my heart rate to spike into the 160s. Like I was doing a super-intense HIIT workout or something! It’s a reminder that I have lost a lot of my fitness over the past few years, and I know I’m doing exactly what I need to do to get it to a better place. But it’s still hard to realize how far I have to go.

Reading… The Mostly True Story of Tanner and Louise by Colleen Oakley. I am usually pretty good about reading our book club book early in the month, but since we had to move our April book club to the first Friday of May due to scheduling issues, I put off reading the book until I realized late last week that I still hadn’t gotten it from the library. Oops! I quickly ordered it and picked it up on Saturday, and now have just under a week to finish it. It will be a quick read so that shouldn’t be a problem, but I’m usually better than this!

Watching… Mr. and Mrs. Smith, still. Why is it taking me so long to watch this show? It only has eight episodes and every time I sit down to watch one, I’m immediately drawn in! It’s not the fault of the show. Maybe my attention span for watching anything that’s not a 30-minute sitcom or a reality TV show is just trash now. IDK.

Listening to… “Cowboy Carter” by Beyonce. This was my album for April, and I thought it was pretty good. I’ve never actually listened to Beyonce, but wanted to give this album a shot. I have a few faves from the album but the majority of it was a miss for me. (Sorry!) I liked Texas Hold ‘Em, 16 Carriages, Daughter, and Ya Ya the most.

Anticipating… all my fun summer travel plans. Next month, I’m going to New Orleans for a few days. In June, I’m going to Chicago (where I’ll get to meet Kim’s cats, squeeeee). And I’m hoping to also do a long weekend in Deerfield Beach. Let’s go, summertime!

Thinking about… getting bangs. I have been thinking about this for quite a while now. I had bangs for a long time but grew them out during the pandemic. And now I think I want to bring them back to add a little softness to my face. Then again, I do enjoy how much easier life is without bangs. Bangs are a lot of work. There’s the upkeep (I learned how to cut my own bangs when I had them, so I’m not too worried about that), and then there’s just the knowledge that it’s a separate part of my hair I’ll have to deal with every morning. But I think the bangs are happening! My hair appointment is next Friday so stay tuned.

Buying… a breakfast sandwich maker! I was talking to my dietician a few appointments ago about my penchant for sausage egg McMuffins from McDonalds and we were working through all the steps required to make a breakfast sandwich at home… and that’s when I remembered the genius of a breakfast sandwich maker! The story behind this particular one starts years and years ago when Bri and I were working at the same company, and she was gifted this breakfast sandwich maker in a White Elephant gift exchange. She loved it so much that she bought a second one for the office! It makes it so easy to make a delicious breakfast sandwich in the morning, and I have very much been enjoying my new gadget.

Grateful… to myself for pushing to have a sleep study done. I had to ask for this sleep study and, at first, my doctor seemed a little apprehensive about putting in the order. I don’t think it came from a bad place; I think she knew that most health insurances needed a stronger reason to approve a sleep study other than snoring. So she asked me a lot of questions about why I wanted it done, and it made me start to question if I even needed it. But my thought was to get the sleep study done and see what the results were. Hopefully, they would come back negative for sleep apnea. Of course, we know now that’s not what happened. I was diagnosed with a severe case of sleep apnea, and it made me even more grateful to myself for pushing for this sleep study. You really do have to be your own advocate sometimes!

What are you currently watching and anticipating? 

Categories: Recurring Series

Five for Friday (v. 102)

1) Bad news first

On Wednesday, my doctor’s office called me with the bad news: I have severe obstructive sleep apnea. This means that I’m having more than 30 apneas/hypopneas per hour while I’m sleeping. (Apneas are episodes where I stop breathing; hypopneas are episodes when I have shallow breathing due to partially blocked airways). I’ve been trying to process this news this week because while I was fairly confident I’d receive a sleep apnea diagnosis, I did not realize that my condition was this bad. It puts a lot of things into perspective, including why I’m so tired all the time. I’m not just a lazy person! It’s because I’m barely getting the good deep sleep I need and I’m not delivering enough oxygen to my cells and through my bloodstream!

The next step for me is to do a CPAP titration sleep study, which will take place in a sleep lab. (Ugh.) I need to do this study to get properly fitted for a CPAP machine and make sure it’s delivering the desired airflow I need to not have these apneas/hypopneas throughout the night. And then I’ll start my new life of sleeping with a CPAP machine. I know it will take some getting used to, but I’m also looking forward to seeing how this improves my quality of life. Will I finally understand what it means to be well-rested? Will I not need to take a nap almost every day to keep going? Stay tuned!

2) Weight loss

It is time to think about weight loss. First, there are the concerning bloodwork numbers: high cholesterol, high glucose, high A1C. Then, there’s this sleep apnea diagnosis. Now, I know that sleep apnea can be caused by a lot of factors, not solely weight, but I have a strong suspicion that my weight is causing it for me. If I can reverse the condition by losing weight, I want to at least try. If I was healthy at the weight I am at today, then I’d continue doing what I’ve been doing. But the truth is that I am not and I need to figure out what a healthy weight is for me. I am nervous about making this statement, and super nervous about figuring out how I’m going to actually lose weight, because I am still firmly anti-diet culture. I am not joining WW or Noom or any of those programs. I’ve already talked to my dietician about this diagnosis and we have an appointment next week to discuss what to do next. All I know is that I want to figure out a way to lose weight in a healthy way, in a way that doesn’t feel like deprivation, and in a way that leads me to living the healthier lifestyle I need to not have dozens of health problems down the road.

3) Eloise is 6!

Let’s move on to better subjects: Eloise’s birthday! She turned 6 years old on Wednesday, which I’ve learned means she turned the big 4-0 in human years. I didn’t do anything wild and crazy for her birthday because, well, she had no idea it wasn’t just a normal day in her world. I gave her lots of love and sang Happy Birthday to her throughout the day, and she got to have a full Meaty Stick as a special treat (I usually break them in half and give one to each cat; yes, Lila also got a full Meaty Stick, I’m not a monster). I haven’t figured out exactly what I want to buy her for her birthday, but I’m taking a trip to PetSmart this weekend so hopefully I will be inspired.

I’ve written many posts about these cats of mine, but let’s talk about Ellie for a second. Also known as Ellie-Bellie or just Bellie, she is my soul-cat. I feel connected to her on a deep, personal level. When I had to evacuate to Fort Lauderdale during a hurricane in 2022, I lost Ellie for a few hours. We had just gotten to an Airbnb with me, the cats, my mom, my stepdad, and the dogs, and I had closed the girls up in the bedroom I was staying in. When I went back into that bedroom to check on them, I was able to see Lila hiding under the bedside table, but Ellie was nowhere to be found. I searched everywhere for her in that room and throughout the house. My mom and I even went outside to look for her, calling her name. I was in panic mode and so frustrated with myself for losing her. I couldn’t eat dinner, couldn’t read, couldn’t do anything but think about Ellie being outside in the rain and scared. I felt like the worst cat mom ever! I went back to my bedroom and was just laying on the bed, contemplating life without Eloise (I’m super dramatic, yes)… and then who prances her little tuxedo self from behind Lila and meowing at me, like, “Oh, were you looking for me? My b!” Yes, this means Lila hid a full-sized cat with her body. I really thought I had looked under the bedside table, but I guess she got lost in the shadows. I was so grateful she was safe and here and warm and I could give her all the kisses I wanted. Every time I think about that night and how scared I was when I thought I had lost her, it reminds me how damn much this sassy, silly cat means to me.

4) TTPD

Should we talk about The Tortured Poet’s Department? Yes, we should. I wasn’t sure how I was going to feel about this album, and I was very overwhelmed when I realized there were THIRTY-ONE songs to listen to. (How does she find the time?!) During my first listen, I was not sure if this was going to be the album for me. It’s very depressing at times, all about the ins and outs of heartbreak, of being a public figure, of having to put on a brave face in the midst of hard things happening. It made me feel really sad for Taylor! But during my second listen, I was suddenly hooked. This is generally how it goes for me with Taylor, though. I need at least two or three listens to get a feel for the album. I have a lot of skips on this album, but that’s to be expected with so many songs! It’s hard to name my favorites but I’ll try:

  • My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys
  • Down Bad
  • So Long, London
  • Who’s Afraid of Little Old Me?
  • I Can Do It With a Broken Heart
  • So High School

5) Weekend plans

I have a really fun weekend ahead of me! I don’t have anything going on tonight, which is good because I need to build up the battery reserves for Saturday and Sunday. On Saturday, I have a writing date with Mikaela in the morning, a podcast recording date with Bri in the afternoon, and then game night with the fam in the evening. I’m also going to try to slip in some shopping with my mom between podcasting and game night. And on Sunday, Bri and I have an adventure day planned! We’re going to spend the day at Egmont Key State Park, exploring the ruins and lighthouse and then relaxing on the beach. I can’t wait!

Your thoughts on TTPD? What are your weekend plans?